How do you deal with a cranky toddler?

Rebecca - posted on 04/16/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My twins are 22 months old and the one is generally in good spirits but the other is horrible. If the tear on her cheek dries up she needs to cry again. It is constant...everyday. The only time that I get 10 minutes of happiness out of her is when it is bath time. She just walks around tearing apart the house and crying. Always needs to be held and always wants to nurse. I only nurse them twice a day (morning and night). They hate drinking regular milk but will drink water from a cup during the day and they eat really good. She is not constipated. She just chases me around the house crying for me to pick her up and then when I do she cries because I won't let her nurse. It has been about 4 months like this and I just want it to stop and for her to be happy. We have had family visiting for the past 2 weeks and they could not believe how difficult a child she is. I think they can't wait to go home and get some quiet! What do I do?

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Khadijah - posted on 04/19/2011

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Ok then, well it sounds like you have a cuddle baby on your hands who happens to be very sensitive. One of my girls is the same. I am thankful that she has just gotten pass the "following me around and crying stage". My nerves would be so frazzled at the end of the day. What I had to do sometime when she would cry non stop is make sure she was dry, fed, and nothing was hurting her. Then I would hold her for a while and rock her, to try and soothe her. After-wards I would try and put her down and if she starts the crying up, I knew that she just wanted me to hold her all day. Realistically we as mothers (especially Moms of multiples or Mom of several different aged children) simply cannot do. So I would put her in her crib until she settled down. That was actually advice her Pediatrician gave me. It was tough at first and I caved several times, but in the end it worked out great. Sometimes I would put her sister with her and put some toys in there with them. This gave her a chance to self-soothe and me a chance to collect my thoughts and get my nerves back in order.



I also seen that on an episode of Supper Nanny when a mother's son would cling to her so much that she couldn't even cook dinner (my little girl did the same). This was also a safety hazard. The Super Nanny had her to pick him up and remove him from the kitchen. He returned four times and eventually he gave up and did what she asked him to do. She said you can also gate off the area which will allow the child to be safe but still have you in their sights.

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Rebecca - posted on 04/18/2011

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I really think she may just be a high needs cuddle baby. I always nurse together and have a huge milk supply. When I give them milk in a cup she takes a few sips and plays with the rest so I really don't think she is thirsty. I even tried flavored milk and they both hated it. They are both growing well. She is the kind of kid that if you look at her the wrong way she will burst into tears. It is just so frustrating. She takes a long time to warm up to people as well. I can't get a new babysitter without making sure they meet her at least 4 or 5 times before I leave her with someone. As for teeth all of them have been in for 2 months now. It is just so draining to listen to it all day long.

Khadijah - posted on 04/18/2011

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There are a few things that could be the issue. It may be that she isn't getting enough milk. I know you said you nurse twice a day but try to make a note of who is nursing first and how long they are nursing. The 2nd child to nurse may not be getting enough. Also, how long are they nursing? My twin girls at 26 months and their Pedi said they should have a minimum of 24oz or milk per day. You may either need to increase her milk intake or try and ween her from the breast. Did you plan to BF beyond 2 years? If not you may want to start weening now. My girls didn't do well with cows milk so I've had them on soy milk since their 1st birthday (when I took their bottles away). You can also try a flavored milk.

If you are going to stay with the breast feeding then you may need to add another feeding to her day.

Also, check to see if her back teeth are cutting through. This could also be a reason for her crankiness. Other than those things you make just have a "cuddle baby" on your hands. That is what I call one of my girls. She LOVES Mommy and loves to sit on my lap, lay on my chest, smell my neck, for me to kiss her imaginary boo-boo's, etc.



I know it can be very frustrating when they get to that point but you have to decide what you can tolerate. You don't want to lose you sanity from listening to all the whining. You have to keep Mommy happy too.

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