i have 1 yr old twin girls, how can i prevent myself from going insane?

Hania - posted on 09/15/2011 ( 9 moms have responded )

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i am a stay at home mom but i am really getting tired of staying home all the time with the girls. i wanna get out , go shopping, have lunch at a resturant , just get up and go out without feeling like im out on a mission. none of my freinds even have 1 child and having 2 limits me from so much. the only thing i feel like i can comfortably do with them is get groceries if i really need to. i would love to take them to the mall but i feel like they would get too fussy and i wouldnt be able to handle them. what can i do to stay sane?
is there anyone in long island , ny area with twins in a similar situation?i would love to get to know other moms with multiples

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Nicole - posted on 09/18/2011

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i have 17 month twin girls and i know how you feel although i am back to work now i was home all summer. i am a teacher. what i did is took them to the play ground on harnesses which i bought at target for 10 each. one is a bear the other a monkey. this allows the girls to play and be safe. i took them to the mall in there stroller and they love it, they love to watch and say hi to people. i can take them out to eat, they like to be in high chairs and eat out cause they are people watchers. mine do not get fussy when out in public they enjoy it and will fall asleep in there stroller.

Kristin - posted on 09/16/2011

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i feel your pain sweetie. I am 21 with 1 1/2 yr old twin gurls AND a 3 yr old. It gets MUCH easier when they can walk i think. I love taking them to parks, i specifially look for ones where the gurls dnt need to b monitored as closely so i can follow one and watch the other. With twins tho everything is gonna be much harder but i find being prepared helps. Bring crackers toys and juice(bottles in they r still on those) i also find if u buy them something while ur out they r occupied. But to keep urself sane i usually only go out for about an hour a day. then later that night ill take them for a walk after dinner. I wont take my gurls out unless im really in the mood otherwise youll make urself insane. Also nick jr helps ALOT with muh baby gurls and its made them super smart. im in ur exact situation so if u need any times dnt hesitate to ask=)

Alda - posted on 09/16/2011

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I'm in the UK and we have playgroups and play centres here (government funded). Even if you just put them in their pushchair and go for a walk, they'll love that and it'll get you out of the house.



What I used to do is drive to the shop, put them both in the trolley (the one with 2 child seats) and just push them round the shop, pointing out stuff to them. People will coo over them, they'll see lots of new people and things and, even if you haven't bought anything, for them it would have been a huge adventure :-).



Lots of restaurants have high chairs for children, so there's not reason you shouldn't go. As for going to the mall - go for it! It will be an adventure for the little ones. If they kick up a fuss every single person with children will understand and emphasise with you - as for the rest - who cares what they think! Don't sell yourself short, practice makes perfect and you'll soon learn to cope with taking them out on your own. Also, what we did from the time they were about a year old is put them in a kindergarten for one morning a week. Did them the world of good and taught them to socialise with other children, and it gave me a morning all to myself! A total luxury, I assure you lol.



Also, the reigns (or harness) is a great invention. You can take them so many places and don't have to worry about a buggy. My two are 3 now and in pre-school 4 mornings a week, but I still try and take them out every afternoon. Good luck and if you need someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on, please feel free to message me x

Kim - posted on 09/15/2011

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I'm not a sahm,but have been working 3rd shift since my 21 month old boys were born. So i'm home ALL day long with them also. I do go out a lot though! Even if it is just by myself. I take them to parks that are safe for them to run around in, or just taking them to the store to walk around and get one thing. It's hard to entertain two babies all day long. And it is also very emotionally exhausting! Like you, I don't have any close friends with children, so I have no one to hang out with. I have gone out on lunch dates and other activities but I always have to bring someone with me to assist me!

One year olds are a difficult stage too, because they are ready to get up and go, but aren't very good at it yet! It will get easier, in some ways, as they get older. You will be able to do more things as they get older. Next summer will be great for you!

Even though I used to think they were bad and parents were horrible for using them, I got my boys harnesses so I can take them out more often by myself. I actually used them twice so far and surprisingly haven't received any dirty looks yet. It's great for going for short walks or running into the store without using a stroller. You should look into them. Maybe when your girls get better at walking around you could run to a mall or store and just let them walk around with you. Sometimes just getting some fresh air is enough to revitalize ones mind :)

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Krista - posted on 09/21/2011

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I completely agree with finding a local twins club. Mine was a life saver when my boys were infants but now that they are 3.5yrs its nice to have playdates and things with moms that are in the same boat.. we help each other coral the kids because we all know what to expect.
I am an older mom and all my friends kids are 18+ so they dont want to be around toddlers especially twin boys! lol So I had to break down and build a new life for myself by making friends and taking time out for me activities. I choose to scrapbook a couple times a month. In the past I have also set up a sitter for no reason other than for me to get out and wander. Some days you just need to get away and it does not reflect on your love of your children. They will actually see that mom respects herself and treats herself good and that will pass on to your girls!
Ask for help and take it when someone offers. Have a list ready for those who do ask! :-)
Good Luck! It gets easier in some ways.. and new ways it keeps getting harder! lol just being honest! :-)

Linda - posted on 09/19/2011

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In the US there are Mothers of Multiples groups nationwide. My daughter joined and got so many helpful hints and a lot of help from the members. Also, if someone offers help take it. I had my 5 year old grandaughters for at least 2 days a week since they were born. They started kindergarten last week and I am having empty nest symdrome. I have already volunteered at their school to keep myself invested in their lives.

Alda - posted on 09/16/2011

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Also try and find out if you have a local twins club. My girls love going to their 'club' and you're with other parents who know exactly what you're going through and it's a great opportunity to make new friends :-)

Jennie - posted on 09/16/2011

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Where is your family? My husband and I separated when my twins were 4 months old my family was able to help as much as they could..I didn't go out much but when I tried, I always had a friend, mom or sister come with me.

Ashley - posted on 09/16/2011

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You know what girl, I think you need good friends that will help you get out. If they don't have any kids, then there's no reason why they shouldn't help you. You have enough to deal with being a mom of twins, but a real friend would watch them for you for a little while you went out to have some 'you' time!! :)
I have twin girls as well! They are 17 months old now, and non stop going everywhere, but I have other people over to keep my mind busy and on adult conversation!!
I hope this helps! :)

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