Single mother of 6 mo twins ; father not interested

Marisa - posted on 12/30/2011

It is almost midnight. Owen is sick, Ericka is sleeping in he bouncy seat. Deadbeat dad called and I was so hoping he could help me out for a few hours this weekend, but he was drunk and hung up on me. Why do I continue to allow myself this humilation? I am really concerned- having no help and no money with a sore back I don't know how I will make it alone until Tuesday. Any suggestions. And yes I have contacterd local mutliples group. Thanks everyone for your comments. This is like the only outlet I have

Michelle - posted on 12/30/2011

Marisa, first of all, you're doing an amazing thing! You really are.

My local Twins association used their Christmas party to collect diapers, formula and food for parents of multiples in financial need. They also keep a small stock of baby clothes on hand. Theyve mentioned they waive membership fees for those in difficulty as well. Try checking with your local association to see if they have a similar plan. There are other multiples moms out there who will totally understand and sympathize!

Best of luck to you, keep us up to date.

Sunny - posted on 12/28/2011

Marisa...hang in there! You are #1 a strong woman for leaving him and #2 a wonderful mother to your twin boy and girl! I just had my twin boy and girl 2 weeks ago but they're in the NICU till March. Although your husband is not supportive just be thankful for having your babies healthy and with you to hold! This is when family and friends will become your support.

Renee - posted on 12/28/2011

i agree with amy, you did what was right, and i can tell you that it does get better. i was in your place about 3 years ago. i had twin sons and i left the abusive drunk father of my kids and they were 4 months old. i was still breast feeding. i did find local communities to help me, sometimes food pantries also have diapers. i kept telling myself that living dirt cheap was better then watching my kids grow up and be like their dad. i still work very hard and my sons are happy and healthy. they do not see their dad at all and he has never given me a dime, but now wants to fight me in court, do yourself a favor and file for child support right away, and try to get a lawyer. i dont know what legal aid is like there, but sometimes there are other places that can find you a lawyer based on him being abusive. i really hope you do not get sick, but i use to keep little toys and big books in a closet and when i couldn't get out of bed i would pull that stuff out and they would stay entertained while i stayed in bed most the day. you are already smart and strong enough to stand up for your family, you can get through anything now.

Amy - posted on 12/26/2011

I would contact local government, and or religious associations in your area. There is a lot of help out there for those who need it and you might be able to even stay in a shelter where you will be safe, warm and fed. You did whats best for your LO's and you should be so proud about that. In my opinion I wouldn't even be in contact with the father if he is abusive. Do you have any support near by like friends or family? Try calling around and keep us updated.