My daughter has been extremely difficult as of late - how do I deal with her?

Karen - posted on 04/16/2009 ( 1 mom has responded )

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For the past couple of weeks my 6 year old daughter has been acting out at home. She sometimes flat out refuses to do what is asked of her and she literally just won't move. It gets to the point where I start to yell, at which point she starts crying and nothing that I say will get her to stop. If I ask her to walk (let's say we are outside) she won't do it. She gets what I refer to as jelly legs (she won't even stand up). She even told someone that "Mommy hits me sometimes". I swear that isn't true -one time when she was acting up real bad and walking home along the curb and refusing to walk up the stairs I gave her a whack on the butt, but that's it. I've tried punishing her and taking away things she likes but so far no such luck. Does anyone have any ideas on how to handle this because I'm at the end of my rope - any suggestions would be greatly appreciated - thanks



oh, and on a side note - she's a perfect angel in school. Don't get me wrong - I am thrilled about that but I'm confused. She can behave at school but not at home?

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Lynnette - posted on 10/08/2009

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My daughter is 5 so i'm not sure if we're on the same level or not.

You didnt mention what your home life is like. Is it just the 2 of you? Is this your daughter's first experience at school?...

I am a firm believer that children model what they see. Maybe she sees your partner ignoring you and thinks its ok to not listen to you?...

Or maybe you have been busy lately with other stuff and havent spent as much time with her as usual. It seems that she is only reacting to something else. Talk to her and let her know that she is loved and wanted. Isnt that what we all want?...

Taking things away from her is pointless. It only makes her feel less loved and valued. And it really has nothing to do with her behaviour. If she refuses to walk, you keep on walking. Dont completely abandon her, just let her know that she cant control you by being a whiny, uncooperative brat. And let her know the consequences of telling people that you hit her. Does she want to be taken away from her mom to live in a shelter or with another family? Probably not.

Maybe she just needs a hug. Sounds like you do too.

Best wishes Karen.

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