11 year old starting her peroid and is in deniel

Madlene - posted on 08/22/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )




She refuses to talk about it, (she is very strong willed) and refuses to wear protection, I do not know how to handle this situation. She would not go to school todaybecause she will not wear her pad. She is so upset about being a woman and refuses to do anything I suggest. Please help ---I can't imagine this happening every month. Yes. she has had several loved ones discuss this prior to her starting--she just states "I do not want to talk about it".


~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/23/2016




Totally agree with Dove.
Have you given her any books to read in private about this? That may help. Her period is not going to go away as we all know, but maybe reading about her body, and what is happening will help. Knowing that it is normal, and every other women goes through this will help. Eventually she will come to recognize this, but please do not ever shame her. You never said you were, but I had to say it.


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His - posted on 08/24/2016




This brings me back to that moment in my life. My mother never spoke to me about my period or why I would have one. I was so embarrassed about girl stuff that I purposely missed the film that was shown at school in my Health class. She will get on board soon enough with what she needs to do once she gets over the initial shock. A book is a good idea. But also let her know that she can talk to you anytime and ask questions. The Care and Keeping of You 2 by Cara Natterson has rave reviews and it's sold on Amazon. You may want to check the book store so you can get it quicker.

Jodi - posted on 08/23/2016




At this age, it is a scary thing, and kids can be a little grossed out by it. Denial isn't unusual. However, it also isn't an option. But I totally understand - my own 11 year old has just started her period and while she is not in denial and is reasonably open about it, she needs reminders around her hygiene and we are still working on those aspects (in particular diposal of her pads, etc). But she also started wearing a pad constantly because she was terrified of getting a period any time.

Gentle reminders with acknowledgement that you understand this is new and sometimes a little confusing and scary is ok.

Does she have a school nurse who can engage her at some point to try to help determine the block in discussing it? Sometimes talking to someone else can help.

I also agree with the having a book to read in private.

Dove - posted on 08/22/2016




Poor girl. She may not want to talk about it, but it's here and she has to deal w/ it now whether she wants to or not. That's just life and NOT dealing w/ it isn't an option.

If she is refusing to wear a pad she can be responsible for all her dirty laundry and paying to replace any items that get permanently stained.

I will admit that I, too, was in denial my first month... didn't even tell anyone. I got over it and hopefully she will soon too. If not you might want to consider having her talk to a female therapist if talking w/ you or other female relatives/family friends is not helping her.

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