Lisa - posted on 02/14/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )
My beautiful daughter that I have raised alone has very recently been more to herself. We have been very close up until now. A couple of weeks ago she began to cry in the car. I asked her what the problem was and she said that all of her friends come to her for advise, that she is the "fixer" of problems. I told her that true friends would never place that kind of a burden on her shoulders.
We had a talk and all seemed fine. It made me begin to think of social media. She has been more and more to herself, but still things seemed fine. She has an iphone with SnapChat, Instagram, texting, and recently I found out she had Twitter to follow her favorite band. I caught her in a small lie about going to the part. I asked her and her friend if there were boys there, which I'm not opposed to, and they said no, just girls. I really was torn on finding more info but every parent I spoke to said I should have her passcodes and check out her posts to make sure everything is ok.
I joined TeenSafe and quickly found out that she has a boyfriend. For the most part, everything else was ok. Some inappropriate things on Twitter that I did discuss with her. I approached her about the language between her and her so called boyfriend. Very innocent, yet I disapprove of his wording of "dating". Although most of the kids use code for cussing, he has used the S word and pissed off verbiage that I'm not fond of. Since telling my daughter that I'm monitoring her phone, just is more withdrawn and does not really talk to me. I'm sure it's because I took her device, but also because I told her that she is too young to have a boyfriend. I pulled her Ipad last night at 11:00pm. Put it on the counter and text that the ipad was going up to her crush. Even though she knows that I see her texts, she texted to him "That was my Mom and I don't like her texting my friends.
It's V-Day. Every year my sweet daughter has made me something. This year nothing, no more good night Mom, no more I love You's, no more hugs. She looks at me like she does not care. No tears, no emotion. She has ALWAYS been so loving. I'm a single Mom, have always been passive aggressive, which many dual parent roles have been. I'm definitely the aggressive parent right now laying down ground rules. I'm not proud of blowing up a time or two, I need to work on that! BUT... she is only 12, and I want to protect her and keep her innocent as long as I can. Today's social media is scary. We're heading down a scary path that I'm not sure I'm ready for.