16 year old out of control

Angelina - posted on 03/09/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I have a 16yr old son who is completely out of control. we have tried everything from taking away all of his electronic devices, taking the door off his bedroom, grounding to my husband actually getting into a physical fight with him. He is a habitual liar, has stolen large amounts of money from us, sneaks out, has been caught smoking Marijuana in our bathroom, and won't participate in any family activities or dinners, nothing. He constantly argues with me about everything when I dont do or give him what he wants. I dont know what to do anymore, someone please hive me some advice. Please know, he is a kid who has always had pretty much everything he has ever needed or wanted. The latest electronic devices, clothes, shoes, money when ever he needed. Allowed to hang out with his friend whenever he wanted. He was a good student, played soccer and had a great relationship with his dad. All this ended little by little in the last year. Now he is out of control and i dont know how to help him.

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Jodi - posted on 03/09/2015

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"Please know, he is a kid who has always had pretty much everything he has ever needed or wanted. The latest electronic devices, clothes, shoes, money when ever he needed. Allowed to hang out with his friend whenever he wanted."

This. What you have raised is a self entitled brat. He needs to work a little harder for what he has. I will absolutely advocate children doing volunteer work or finding a part time job to WORK for the things they have in life. Handing them over on a silver platter will only create entitlement.

Time to pare back on the material things in life for your 16 year old. And it isn't going to be easy now that you've already set the precedent. This is the trouble these days - people think they are being great parents because their kids get everything they ever needed or wanted. That ISN'T a GOOD thing. It really isn't. Kids should NOT get everything they want when they want it. Life just isn't like that and you are setting them up for failure. Time to take back control and turn it around.

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