18 year old out of the house

Tracy - posted on 10/01/2016 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Hi,
Someone I know (a friend of my daughter), an 18 year old, has been kicked out of the house by his parents. He claims it is because of school problems (but of course I can not confirm it). However he currently plans to sleep in a car - which sounds terrible to us - and our daughter feeds him. I tried to find resources online to find him a place to stay but was not successful so far. Is there a way to help him? He did not graduate high school, was planning to finish up now, but will be hard for him without a home. Any advice would be appreciated.

5 Comments

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Jodi - posted on 10/02/2016

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I would suggest contacting his family. Chances are they have very valid reasons for having him leave and if you take him in, you will be enabling those issues. He is 18 and old enough that it is now time for him to grow up and take charge of his own life. If your daughter is feeding him, it's time to tell him to get a job and feed himself. Whatever is going wrong is not going to fix itself until he understand that life is not a free ride.

Michelle - posted on 10/01/2016

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Like I said, you can't get involved in his family problems. There is more to it than just school problems for him to be kicked out of home.
I left home of my own choice the day after I turned 18, my parents had prepared me for living on my own though.
He's not your child. I know you want to help but sometimes it's best to stay out of it.
If you really want to try and do something, talk to his parents and find out why he has left home. You may find that he has walked out because he didn't like the rules. Why would you want to help a teen that is having a toddler tantrum?
Just saying that there are 2 sides of the story and it may be best to find out the other side.

Tracy - posted on 10/01/2016

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Thank you. I really appreciate your input. My daughter is one year younger and she is hardly an adult and he does not seem like an adult to me either. I understand the idea of forcing kids to grow but can't imagine where I would be today if anyone kicked me out before I was settled in my path. This is an immediate problem - what does he do? sleep in the streets? He is from an affluent family and hardly has any street skills, nor does it seem it would lead him in a good direction.

Michelle - posted on 10/01/2016

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There would have to be a lot more to the story than you are being told.
There is only so much you can do, he has made his choice and if he can't make up with his parents and sort things out then he is really on his own.
Surely there are homeless shelters around as that's probably his only choice. He is an adult now and he has to live with his choices.

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