18 yr old adopted son with R.A.D.

Deanne - posted on 04/26/2013 ( no moms have responded yet )

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A week ago today our son stayed out for 3 nights, didn't call etc. This is an escalation from months (years) of chaos with him. Coming from a background of neglect, abuse and a heroin addicted mother (she later od'ed" when he was 8) we have been the helicopter parents who have hovered over his every move, always excusing his behaviors because of his early life trauma.
Now he's18 and knows everything. So we had the police give him a citation for possession of a small amt of pot. He had to face the charges alone, we told him. However, as of this past weekend his inconsideration and entitlement attitude was the last straw and we told him he could no longer stay at our house.
He left with a family friend and I, as always started working in the background to insure he wouldn't go to the "wrong safehouse or shelter"..so I facilitated that and he went there.
Then he didn't comply with their rules and tonite he will not have any place to go. My husband and I are sick. Always reverting back to his childhood, and poor kid and did we do the right thing. Sleepless nights and guilt and worry.
I know he is doing "his thing", "chillin" finding girls, avoiding discomfort and growing up. And I know he has to go thru this and I keep giving it over to God and then taking it back. I pray for all of us.

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