19yr old daughter, freshman in college- pregnant

Deana - posted on 10/06/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My heart is broken. One of those stories--"she had it all" or " she was getting out of here & going places" or " she is MORE than this place".....yea, that was my Gracie! She is going to school for Music Theatre & with the voice of an Angel she would no doubt be wherever she wanted to be! EVERYONE recognizes the amazing gift she has as a singer! It will send chills up your spine any & EVERYTIME you hear her sing. She has told me many times that she doesn't even like kids OR their bodily functions! haha She was always good with children, but never really wanted any @ least not in the near future!........well, that has obviously changed. Now this is a child that has had it pretty easy most of her life, maybe not in the sense of having lots of material things, easy. Things came easy...She is terrified of the dentist, she refused an exam at the doctors office when she went on birth control AND she HATES needles!!! '-' Now I have to say I told her & it's true, I am behind her & support her 110% with whatever she decides to do. We talked about the options, she was uncertain but leaning towards the " i don't even like kids"....Next thing I know it's I am going to have the baby. Ok..... I have been supportive, I have been REAL! She thinks I am being negative, but I truly am not! I just don't think she gets it! Not really. It's as if she is floating around in a "bubble"...lalala I told her I am just worried about her- that's what a "MOM" does! I just want to really be positive & I am struggling....

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Deana - posted on 10/07/2013

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Thank you Jodi! I do believe in her- I know she CAN do it, and I have told her that...also that it will just be twice as hard but it is all possible! I guess as a mother, I just know the struggles & hardships of being a single mom....At least for the last 10yrs....I just wanted things to be easy for her, to live & go & do! But, I BELIEVE in her, she is a smart, talented & (can be) very determined when she wants to be! I just want to be able to STAY POSITIVE :) Bring on the margaritas!!! lol

Jodi - posted on 10/07/2013

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I hear your disappointment and can totally understand it. It is okay to feel that. I think, I'd be concerned if my step-daughter got pregnant now (she is 21 in her 3rd year at Uni, still one year to go). But, at the same time, I also have total faith in her that if it did happen, she is the type of person who would just make it work. She has a great job, she works hard, she is a sensible girl, great student, and so on. I think she'd still "have it all", she really would. This doesn't have to be the end of her dreams, it will just make them that little bit more difficult to attain. Believe in her. That's what she needs from you right now. She will figure it all out in the long run, and whatever happens for her, I am sure she will make it work.

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