1st trip away from the kids.

Kealani - posted on 05/03/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My husband of 10 years and I are going to be going on a trip to celebrate our anniversary in a few weeks. We will be gone for 9 days. My 19 month old and 3 year old will be staying with my dad and stepmom during the trip. They live just 5 minutes away, and see my kids on a weekly basis (at least). THey have been having sleepovers once a week for the last few months to get used to sleeping over at grandma and grandpas. We will also be hiring a babysitter to help out my stepmom with the kids (as my children are her first experience with kids and isn't 100% comfortable with having both of them on her own during the day). I have been trying to "tee up" my 3 year old, about "mommy and daddy's trip", letting her know that she and her brother will be spending a week at grandma and grandpas house, and that we will be back with surprises. She hasn't had any negative responses at all whenever I bring it up. However, I have noticed that over the last few days, she must be starting to dwell on the fact that the trip is coming up, because she has been a lot more clingy to me and has had some tears when I have taken her to grandparents house (they don't last long as they immediately distract her with something else). I am trying to decide what will be the best strategy on departure day to make it as easy as possible on the kids (and mama!) to minimize the tears, and is it wise or not to keep in touch every day, either with phone calls or skype. Or would that just make it more hard for them when they realize that we are not with them?

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Amber - posted on 05/03/2011

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We're getting ready to do the same thing. We leave in 2 weeks for six days.
We're going to call and chat or skype with our son, but he's 4 years old and is comfortable with staying at grandma's.

Dad has been away with the military. From that experience I've learned that my son relaxed and felt better when he could see him. So, that's what we'll be doing.
Sometimes he doesn't want to, and we don't make him. I just kind of take his cues and go with the flow.

Honestly though, I went on a long weekend with one of my girlfriends when my son was 3-1/2 and he didn't even miss me. He was home with dad and grandma...he was having fun. His only complaint was that daddy's mashed potatoes were yucky and grandma cut his sandwich the wrong way lol.

Karli - posted on 05/03/2011

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It is never easy to leave our kids behind, but you are obviously very busy with 2 young kids and I'm going to assume not much alone grown up time for you and your hubby. I would have to say that your little one has no idea that you'll be gone for that long. Your 3 old will miss you and you will miss them. I would say that you should call them maybe every 2 days and ask them how their "vacation" is going. Tell them that you miss them terribly and you think about them all the time..etc, but you are taking this trip for a reason and I think that you should let your hair down and put your feet up, have some serious grown up time and enjoy the trip with just the 2 of you to the fullest. They are obviously close to Grandma and Grandpa, so they will be well taken care of. It's okay to take your Mommy hat off for a few days and enjoy being on vacation with the hubby:)

Allana - posted on 05/03/2011

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its not easy to leave them behind!

my suggestion would be to reassure them you will call (or skype) every day and keep to that, and reassure them that you WILL come back! with the 3 year old, put more emphasis on the fun she will have! there is a childrens book that you might still be able to find, called "Bearnstien Bears A Week At Grandma's" something like that, where the characters are actually dealing with the same thing! read it to her and point out that the bears are feeling the same as she is, and they do have plenty of fun! (thats the book my mom got for me the first time they went away)
maybe you could even get gramma and grampa to let her call you when she gets a little worried about you, so she can rest a little easier
hope this helps :)

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