3 yr old whos screaming when its time to go to preschool

User - posted on 09/10/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My 3 yr old who will be 4 in November just started 3 yr old preschool last week. Everyday he has screamed and cried. It seems to be getting worse to the point I cant even get him in and out of his carseat.... I don't know if I continue to force him or just take him out of preschool for this year. and he can go to 4 yr old preschool next year (Maybe)... I feel like a bad mom when hes screaming and the teacher has to drag him in the door. But then at the end of the day hes happy when I pick him up and talks about his day. But he says he doesn't eat his snack, he wants to sleep there, he doesn't play with anyone.... :( Hes with me (his mom) 24/7 so Im pretty sure its separation anxiety. Idk what to do??? advice please? Today is only day 5 of school and He still isn't any better! getting worse.....

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Dove - posted on 09/10/2014

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My son started preschool at 3.5 (only went 2 days/week) and he screamed hysterically at every drop off for the first 6 weeks. He eventually adjusted.

I also have a friend who's son started at 3... he wasn't screaming, but didn't seem 'happy' so they pulled him and he did just fine the next year.

It's really your call. If you DO decide to pull him.... make sure you spend this next year gradually getting him used to what it will be like next year. Or you can just ride it out for a while and see if he starts to improve.

Chet - posted on 09/10/2014

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It's common for kids to take up to a month to settle into preschool. It would be reasonable to give it another 3 or 4 weeks.

That said, kids don't need to go to preschool. Generally speaking, there are no long term benefits from attending preschool. If you take 100 kids in grade 4 or 5 you won't be able to tell which ones went to preschool and which ones didn't.

At this point, I would talk to the teachers and get an assessment of your son's day. If I understand your message correctly, your son's report is that he doesn't eat snack and doesn't play with anyone. It would be good to get some input from the teacher. Find out how quickly he calms down after you drop him off, how much he is participating, etc.

The thing is, there are lots of things to do with this age besides drop off programs. You son might just be better suited to mom and tot activities, more relaxed playgroups, story time at the library, etc.

Don't stress about this. It's not concerning, and is something kids outgrow in their own time.

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