4 year old is having anger issues

Lydia - posted on 03/02/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Hi all! I am new here; this is my first post! I have two daughters, a 16 month old and a soon-to-be-four-year-old. My older daughter is really sweet most of the time, but sometimes when something small happens, like she bumps her foot on something, she'll get really angry and kick or throw the offending object. She also gets really mad at her sister for crying (which she does a lot right now because she is getting her one year molars). And perhaps on a related note, she gets really scared of seemingly arbitrary things. Like a cd that skips: she used to be fine with it, but now she starts crying and wants me standing by the cd player to be ready to skip the song that skips. Anyway, I guess I just want to know if these things are normal for a child her age. Thanks!

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Lydia - posted on 03/03/2016

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Thanks for the replies! As far as the CD skipping, it really does seem to scare her, as in screaming and crying at the thought of me not skipping it. But she gets that way about different things, and only for a time. I'm glad to hear her aggression seems fairly average. I figured it was, but it is encouraging to hear it now and then.

Lori Ann - posted on 03/02/2016

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hi I'm new also, I have a daughter soon to be 4 as well, and she is very aggressive towards her 1 year old brother

Sarah - posted on 03/02/2016

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At 4 kids can't always express frustration well. You can try to channel her frustration into a different behavior; like rather than kick or throw the object, she can jump up and down, clap her hands. Patience with a crying sibling is tough, it is hard even for adults. So reassure her that her feelings are valid, "I know it is hard to hear her fuss and cry but she is little so we gotta try to be patient" Maybe headphones could be an option for in the car or when she is confined to the same space. The CD skipping; does it really frighten her or is it annoying? Rather than jump up to skip over the song, you could suggest she count the skips, or if she knows when the skip is coming cover her ears? All of her behavior seems pretty typical, at 4 she can control many things so thing that are out of her control may really bug her.

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