43 and pregnant and very afraid

Barbara - posted on 03/12/2015 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Hoping to hear some words of inspiration and encouragement just took test yesterday and positive...all i see so far on internet is scary stuff...how unlikely it is that this baby will make it..i am scared and wonder where to get the strength to be positive...43 seems to be so high risk...

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Barbara - posted on 03/16/2015

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I should not have to feel guilty...and that is how i feel..guilty...like my baby may not make it..or my baby may have problems like downs or other chromosomal abnormalities because my eggs are too old...😥😥😥😥😥 i still feel so young..my boyfriend of close to six years is 7 years younger than me..i feel like he is disappointed because of two prior miscarriages and now here we go again...😥😥😥 so scared

Barbara - posted on 03/16/2015

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And yes i have no interest in all these tests i feel like i need to let nature take its course i would love to have a little baby and it would be such a blessing if we make it but i just dont know and i am not getting any tests 😥😥😥

Barbara - posted on 03/16/2015

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Hi Chana
Thank you for the sweet message
I have not gone to dr yet.....I feel ok...I have had 2 miscarriages already..I do not feel it is safe for me to tell anyone about this bc I am afraid the baby will not make it again...there is nothing I can do but wait but it is scary and lonely feeling 😥😥😥😥

Chana - posted on 03/16/2015

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Hi Barbara I just wanted to check in and see how you are doing. Hopefully you are going to the doctor soon and trying to stay relaxed and positive.

Chana - posted on 03/13/2015

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Yes 43 is considered advanced maternal age(ama) and yes the doctors will tell you all the negatives, that is their job to make you aware. I will tell you the positives, I just turned 41 when my oldest was born and I was 4 months away from 43 when my second was born. I was told all the negatives and almost everything was negative. I am here to tell you that I had 2 very normal pregnancies with normal pregnancy issues. Both of my girls where full term and very healthy. You need to stay positive and take care of yourself. The doctors will try to get you to do addition tests because of your age but that is your decision to make. We opted not to do the additional tests only because we knew it wouldn't make a difference because we would love the babies regardless. It is scary but it is wonderful and you will be truly blessed in the end.

Sarah - posted on 03/12/2015

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You are at higher risk, but that does not mean something will be wrong. There are also babies born to mom's in their 40's that are just fine. Your doctor will just monitor your pregnancy a bit closer. My doctor had her 1st in her 40's and she is perfectly normal. I am 39 with my 4th and so far no major issues and I have 2 months left to go. Some times you just have to have faith. There is a risk of anything happening no matter your age. Focus on the positives.

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