4yr old started getting in bed with us

Rebecca - posted on 06/20/2011 ( 10 moms have responded )

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my 4yr old has only just started getting into bed with and my husband. she cries and wakes up my 3yr old and they both come which is kind of a squeeze as im 6.5month pregnant with twins and our bed feels like a single after they have got in and my husband needs his sleep as he has to get up at 6.30 for work.wot can i do to stop my chidren coming to us.

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Pam - posted on 06/21/2011

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This can be a really touchy subject for parents. I would not let my kids in bed at night. I would take them back to theit beds and sing to them or lay with them. That way they know theit bed is a safe place to be and it is where they belong at night. If you get into the habit of having them in your bed or in your room at night you can have a REALLY hard time getting them out. If you are getting up and putting them back to bed then your husband can get his sleep for work, your kids will learn to stay in their rooms, and soon there will be peace in the house again and you can catch up on your sleep.

Rebecca - posted on 06/21/2011

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thank you. she tells my husband but not me she cant get the words out in english but can in arabic so its wait till morning to find out wot she dreamt about she always been close to her father so always goes to him unless he not around but i dont want to wake him up to deal with it or he may end up hurting himself at work as it is construction and he 7 floors up at the moment. but i will try taking her back for a few days and see wot happns.thanks again

Kellie - posted on 06/21/2011

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I had a feeling it might be nightmares. What are the nightmares about? Can she tell you about them and what they entail?

If she can tell you what they're about once again that'll arm you better to fight them. You can work with them much better if you know what they're about.

All I can suggest is to just reassure her over and over that you're there and close by if she needs you. So when she wakes from a dream and comes to you take her back to her own bed and cuddle her or sing to her, whatever it is that you do to comfort your child until she either falls asleep are says she's feeling better. I know this isn't ideal sleep wise for you, but once she's feeling safe again they should stop.

Rebecca - posted on 06/21/2011

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my husband just talked to her in his lunch break and we now know she is having nightmares i have no idea wot to do about nightmares or if you can stop them.

Kellie - posted on 06/21/2011

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Have you talked to your 4 Year old? Talk to her and ask her what her problem is. It'll help you to better asses the situation and find a fitting solution.

Jessica - posted on 06/20/2011

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Sounds like they just want to near you, try walkie talkies... one in your room one in theirs... It will be annoying the first few nights but once the novelty wears off it will make them feel connected even when they aren't in the same room.

Rebecca - posted on 06/20/2011

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that would be a good idea if there was room but we already have the cot ready and set up fo when the twins arrive and also i dont want my kids getting used to sleeping with us otherwise wen the twins wake up it will wake them up as well. any other advice. :)

Kate CP - posted on 06/20/2011

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Try putting a mattress on the floor next to your bed and let them sleep there. Things are changing for them and it's stressful. Sounds like they just want to be near Mommy and Daddy.

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