5 day suspension...Really?!

HASNAIN - posted on 04/30/2013 ( 13 moms have responded )

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my son is 16 and in his final year in school he has been suspended becasue basically he was sent out from the class from which he had acknwledged and went out without saying anything, then he had cme in to the class and sat down and began doing hes work everyone in the class was talking but when he looked up and smiled to one of his friends the teacher told him to get out, know he didnt know wat he had did so he had asked him why are you sending me out then the teacher kept on saying get out and tried to grab my sons belongings and work so my son said get off them my son said t him tell me why then ill go ,i havent really done anything, the teacher had then kept saying get out which then provoked him to get angryso my soon pushed the table got up and nudged the teacher as he went past know he has a 5 day suspension, what are your views on this?

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/30/2013

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Soooo.....Let me get this straight.
1) Your son was removed from class, but came back in without permission from the teacher ( quote: basically he was sent out from the class from which he had acknwledged and went out without saying anything, then he had cme in to the class and sat down and began doing hes work)

That's one strike!

2) After re-entering the classroom (after being told to leave) without permission, he brings attention to himself by "smiling" at a classmate and is firmly told to leave again (quote: the teacher told him to get out, know he didnt know wat he had did so he had asked him why are you sending me out then the teacher kept on saying get out)

Let's see...HE RE-ENTERED THE CLASSROOM AFTER BEING TOLD TO LEAVE! If he couldn't figure that out...

3) After continually arguing with the teacher and YOUR SON escalating the situation (not the teacher, your son), your son's final actions are to physically shove furniture in a temper tantrum, and then shove a teacher?

NO, I seriously doubt it was a "shoulder barge" as you put it. Your kid physically put his hands on a person in authority. And you and he are confused about why he was suspended?

As a parent of 2 kids (one older than yours), one of whom was suspended in school, and having worked in the school district, and now at a university, I have to say that, first, if this was a "first offense", some talking would have happened before a 5 day suspension. You'd have been notified of questionable behaviour. Since they "arbitrarily suspended" him, I'd have to say that the school most likely has a file on him, and after multiple offenses, have deemed him a danger to other students and faculty.

And, if he'd complied, not argued, and been respectful, you'd not be having this convo anyway.

If he's not showing remorse (sounds like NOT), and he can't get through his thick skull that it isn't HIS agenda that must be followed, and he has to follow the school rules, this is NOT going to be his first experience with suspension (if it is his first...)

Sit your kid down and find out why he has no respect for authority, and why he feels that his decisions trump the authorities. And then, start working on changing his attitude. Sounds like you've got 5 days to make a fresh start

When my son was suspended, HE CALLED ME from the principal's office. He said "mom, I messed up, I admitted to my mistake, and i'll be spending the rest of the week on suspension. The principal would like to speak to you, if you have a minute"

I talked to the principal, he said "Your kid brought himself into the office, he explained the entire situation, and was backed up by his classmates, and technically, I'd have to say he handled the situation well. HOWEVER, because he violated school policy, I have no choice here".

The difference? My kid showed remorse. HE TURNED HIMSELF IN. He took responsibilities for his actions, and he was truly remorseful and apologetic.

Jodi - posted on 04/30/2013

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Oh, your sons says. Sorry, but firstly, your son was in the wrong in the first place, and secondly, whether provoked or not, your son should not be physically pushing furniture or pushing teachers out of the way. Violence is never acceptable. It makes the classroom environment unsafe for others. Stop making excuses for his behaviour.

I can tell you why he got 5 days suspension. Because clearly he has no remorse. Perhaps if he had been remorseful about his behaviour, he may not have received 5 days.

Jodi - posted on 04/30/2013

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Is this his description? That he "nudged" the teacher? Or is this what the school told you? I highly doubt it was a "nudge". Sorry, but as a school teacher, I can tell you that kids are prone to downplay their behaviour in class. Firstly, your son was in the wrong to just walk out of class anyway. It is highly disruptive to the rest of the class and shows total disrespect. I would generally ask a student who did this to go outside the classroom now and wait while I got the rest of the class onto something and could go and talk to them privately about their behaviour. It isn't appropriate for him to be arguing back to the teacher. Sorry, but the teacher didn't provoke this situation. I highly doubt it is the first time he has done this. It is just the first time you know about. If your son got angry and pushed furniture and pushed the teacher out of the way, then yes, he would get a suspension. Someone could have been hurt. Did you talk to the school about it?

Dove - posted on 04/30/2013

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He argued with the teacher and acted aggressively in class and all he got was a 5 day suspension? He should count himself lucky. I get that he wanted to know why he was getting sent out of class, but you leave the class like the teacher says and THEN deal with the reason/reasons why... outside of the classroom and away from the other students. Chalk it up to a lesson, hopefully, learned.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/01/2013

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He should never have come back into the room without the teachers permission. My question is, why was he sent out in the first place? Really it doesn't matter because he PUSHED the teacher.

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/01/2013

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I don't give a shit what led up to it. He pushed the teacher. He is lucky he did not get expelled. Take the 5 day suspension.

Jodi - posted on 05/01/2013

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"basically he was sent out from the class from which he had acknwledged and went out without saying anything, then he had cme in to the class......."

No, I definitely misinterpreted it now that a reread it. It was just really bad English.

Dove - posted on 05/01/2013

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I think Shawnn misread it... Only cuz I thought the same thing, Jodi. ;)

Who knows though... that's what happens when OP's have no punctuation or proper sentence structure.

Jodi - posted on 05/01/2013

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I missed that Shawnn, that he'd been sent from the room in the first place. I misread it and thought he had walked out of the room without permission. Wow, so he had been sent FROM the room already for some reason and was completely non-compliant!

Amy - posted on 05/01/2013

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Stop defending him, would it be acceptable for him to shoulder barge you if you told him to do something multiple times and he refused??? Honestly he was being openly defiant to a teacher someone he should respect. He was told to leave once, came back into the classroom without permission, OF COURSE he was told to leave a second time even if he decided he would finally do the work, the teacher never gave him permission to come back in!!

He was disrupting other students, he was openly defiant and disrespectful to his teacher, and then he got physical with the teacher. Stop minimizing the fact that he physically was aggressive with the teacher! Honestly even if this was a first offense I think the punishment absolutely fits the crime.

Jodi - posted on 04/30/2013

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Owning up and being remorseful are two different things. Clearly he is not OWNING his behaviour (as opposed to owning UP). It should never have resulted in this in the first place. If the teacher asked him to leave the room, he should have left the room.

HASNAIN - posted on 04/30/2013

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he has owned up to what he has done but he is still saying if he never told me to leave the class for no reason then it wouldn't have resulted to this.

HASNAIN - posted on 04/30/2013

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we are going tomorrow for a meeting but my son says the teacher provoked the situaton as he sent him out for no reason at all, for smiling and yes he "nnudged" him meaning in his way shoulder barged

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