Lisamarie - posted on 07/12/2012 ( no moms have responded yet )
I am having problems with my 5yo daughter at school. She (her name is Destiny) is currently in Reception at school (the year after nursery but before year 1; we live in England) but she will be starting year 1 in September and my 3 year old will be starting nursery.
OK, so, background; Destiny started nursery at 3 and a half, I never had any problems with her, she loved it! Hardly any wet accidents, she's very outgoing so she made lot's of friends very quickly. But then she started Reception. The nursery is a part of the school but you can apply for other schools after nursery, my daughter stayed at the same school but most of her friends went to different ones. I had problems with her from day 1 at reception, every single day and it's nearly the end of the year.
At first she would try to follow me out the door when I left after dropping her off, she'd cry, scream, cling to my leg. She even, unintentionally, kicked a teacher as she was trying to stop Destiny from running after me. There have been many mornings when I have walked home crying because I could hear her screaming from the school gates and I felt terrible.
She settled down slightly but even now she spends a lot of time in the nursery classes with her old teachers and now when I take her to school as soon as we walk through those doors it's like a switch, she pouts at me and looks at her teacher, she tells me she doesn't want me to go or she doesn't want to stay. I have to take her to her teacher and sit her with the teacher so I can leave. She always comes home happy and says she has had a good day so I'm starting to think it's more of a habit now and she's playing up to it.
I've tried loads of different techniques, from being soft and caring to assertive but this just makes her worse.
Right, back to the problem at hand...
As I stated Destiny starts year 1 in September and at school they have been having transition days and meeting their new teachers; for the last two weeks Destiny has been wetting herself at home, quite regularly, and when I picked her up from school on Monday her teacher informed me that Destiny had wet herself at school. She also told me that when asking the children about whether they were excited and looking forward to going to year 1 the whole class yes except Destiny. She is quite stressed by the whole situation, she tells me she is scared of going but will not specify as to why. I have reassured her that her friends are still going to be in Year 1 with her and not too much is going change. Her reception teacher is also going up to year one but I have been told that Destiny will not be in her class because Destiny has grown too attached to that particular teacher and they believe it would be better for her to get to know other teachers.
I really don't know what to do about the situation or how to reassure her (I was always one of those weird kids that actually liked school) She has never been a clingy child (I have a very clingy son so I know what that's like), she's always been so independent and confident but the school run is now a dreaded experience.
Sorry it's so long winded and I hope it makes sense