7 year olds who don't listen

Nicole - posted on 01/01/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I have a 7 year old daughter and an 8 month old daughter, when it comes to my two girlies playing together, my 7 uear old is really mean to her, she takes the babys toys and makes her cry she also smacks her and tries to carry her around everywhere. When I tell her to stop she will roll her eyes and sigh, then tell me I am no fun, any advice will help....my 8 month now old is breast fed, my 7 year old was also breast fed....couls there be some sort of jealousy thing going on?

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Dove - posted on 01/02/2016

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My girls were 6.25 when their brother was born and yes... by the time he was 8 months they were certainly carrying him around quite a bit. They were also 'teasing' him... but to play w/ him, not to make him cry (even though sometimes him whining would be the result of their play... and I'd get them to settle down some). They didn't hit him though.

It is possible that she just wants to 'play' w/ the baby, but doesn't really know how. Maybe the three of you can play together and you can help her w/ activities that WON'T make the baby cry. If she continues to hit him though... she needs to lose all privileges for 24 hours every time she hits. If she still persists in hitting him she can lose the TV and DVD player permanently (no 8 year old needs to own their own devices like this and certainly not in their own room). Instead of taking away the tablet when she is mean... maybe she can earn time on the tablet when she plays nicely w/ her sister.

Jodi - posted on 01/01/2016

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You didn't mention the older children in your OP. But maybe she doesn't like no longer being the baby of the family? How much older are her sisters? And what is her relationship like with her father?

If the TV and DVD player are in her room, maybe you take it away entirely and she has to earn it back.

Edited to Add: Just another thought - Is she trying to play at being mummy to the baby?

Nicole - posted on 01/01/2016

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She has privileges taken away, ( I take her tablet, also send her to her room and take her tv privileges away, she has a tv and dvd player in her room), she also gets grounded.

As to being an only child before the baby came along she wasn't, she has 2 older sisters from both her fathers and my previous marriages

Jodi - posted on 01/01/2016

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What consequences are in place for when she rolls her eyes, smacks the baby, takes the toys or tells you that you are no fun (attitude)?

I highly doubt it is jealousy over breastfeeding - more likely just to be a little jealousy that she is not the only child any more. But that doesn't mean that this behaviour is okay.

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