9 year old PDD-NOS son refusing to go to school, screams about everything, meds hit and miss. Need advice!

Stefanie - posted on 02/26/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My son is 9 years old and has been diagnosed with PDD-NOS. He has been refusing to go to school for several months, and gets very aggressive when the issue is pushed. He has had a couple major meltdowns at school and has been put on home-hospital where the teacher meet with him outside of school for 2 hours a week to give him the academic instruction he needs. The problem is that I'm having a very hard time getting him to get his work done. He screams at me over every little thing. He is extremely constipated and we're working on a bowel cleanse, but it doesn't seem to be working the way it needs to. He still struggles with using the restroom instead of just wetting in his pants. I just don't know what to do. Anyone have any advice?? What has worked in your experience with similar situations?

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Jamie - posted on 02/28/2013

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"I joined a support group and the therapist that runs it told me I should just take things down to the minimum for now. Just love him and spend extra time with him. Not sure how that would work with an IEP, or the school district breathing down my back about him getting his school work done."

I like that therapist's idea. Sometimes constipation has an emotional component as well as physical and maybe reducing his irritation and stress level would help.

Forget the idea of the school district breathing down your back. Just the idea stresses me out, and it seems like it's stressing you out, too.

I know my state has requirements about education and there are ways to meet those requirements outside of public school. Whether that means withdrawing and homeschooling or simply taking a long vacation. I mean, c'mon, surely kids going through traumatic surgeries and chemo aren't hounded by truant officers? There has to be some sort of waiver for medical reasons.

Stefanie - posted on 02/26/2013

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As far at the bowel cleanse he is taking miralax and gartorade. Now we've added Magnesium citrate which produced one bowel movement after the first dose, but nothing since. Not sure what is going on with that, but I'll be calling the GI tomorrow.

He doesn't like his teacher. It's been addressed and is now meeting with his teacher from last year. He is just shutting down, and I think part of it is from the medications he is on. I'm not sure, but something has got to change. He is so irritable. I joined a support group and the therapist that runs it told me I should just take things down to the minimum for now. Just love him and spend extra time with him. Not sure how that would work with an IEP, or the school district breathing down my back about him getting his school work done.

Jamie - posted on 02/26/2013

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Oh Stefanie, you have my sympathy.

My son is 10 with PDD-NOS and is not liking school, but I'm blessed that he's cooperating most of the time. Most of his meltdowns have been at home, thankfully. Mine gets constipated too. Mostly I've been making him really heavy bran muffins that he likes and the extra fiber takes care of it. (Just nosy, you don't have to answer, but what kind of bowel cleanse are you doing?)

Do you know why your son doesn't want to go to school? Or why he doesn't want to do the work?

I know with my son, when he really fought going to school, he was being bullied. But it took him a long time to tell me about it in a way that I really started taking him seriously.

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