A first time mum to be at 27 and scared!

Eunicintah - posted on 09/07/2015 ( 12 moms have responded )

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Hello mums and mums to be. I am 9 weeks along and I still have never had morning sickness. I at times get cramps but the last time I was at my gyno he didn't seem surprised. I've heard myths that if you do not have morning sicknesses it is a baby boy. Did anyone not have morning sickness and the it turned out to be a girl?



Another thing, we have not told our parents...I am so scared what my parents will say once I tell them since i am not married. What should i do?

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Sarah - posted on 09/10/2015

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The only time I felt sick at all was with my twin pregnancy and I have two girls and two boys. So just enjoy the fact you aren't bent over the commode.
Are you and you boyfriend in a loving committed relationship? If so, that's enough. You can't predict their initial reaction, and be ready for it to be less then thrilled. If you give them a moment to breathe and think it over, I'll bet you'll find they are delighted. So what if you put the cart before the horse? A baby is a blessing! Their grandchild. Maybe show them an ultrasound picture? That will make it real? If you tell them all at once, try to take whatever feedback for what it is....shocked? I'd have told my mom alone, and told her I need her support and I can't wait for her to be part of this journey with me. You do what is right for you and your BF. The GP will come around. I promise.

Suzanne - posted on 09/10/2015

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I do understand what you mean by not the wedding type , my fiance had always told me he was never getting married .
My sisters husband said the same thing ten years of being together they finally got married have been for about 6years now
As for my situation my fiance finally asked after 12years of being together .
I told him I will do a small wedding looking at a cruise ship in san Francisco ...we will be married our 15th anniversary.

Do Your parents know you have been dating this guy ??
They may be sad no wedding , but I bet they will be excited to have a new grandbaby....

Just reassure your parents its what you two want. That you two are happy ,

Just alittle something to think about my fiancee has older children and I think for us and their mom it was harder to accept the second oldest at age 15yr had a baby girl , then when the oldest child had her son at age 21yrs and she had already graduated highschool and CNA training so even though not married either own they have their families and all the parents on both sides are just happy they are happy and successful ..

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Eunicintah - posted on 12/09/2015

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Hi Sarah. Hope you're doing fine. I finally told them and they are so happy for me. We went home over the weekend with my fiancee...it was wonderful!

Eunicintah - posted on 10/07/2015

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Hi Sarah, thank you so much for the concern. I had traveled home over the weekend...I mentioned it to mum but she thought i was bluffing and since i am still scared..i didn't insist.. **sob,sob**

Sarah - posted on 09/16/2015

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You haven't messed up, you made an adult choice. It may upset your parents that your cultural beliefs may not have been followed, but a baby is a miracle. At some point you have to tell them, and when you do you can tell them that you hope they support your choices. If you feel like you need to apologize for having a baby before you married, then apologize. I personally don't think you need to apologize, but every family is different. Be happy for the miracle you've created. If you are spiritual, pray about it and ask for God's help. The answer is there. Your parents love you, they will forgive you and they will rejoice in being grandparents.

Eunicintah - posted on 09/15/2015

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Thank you so much Sarah. I don't stay at home and had traveled home to see my folks but i couldn't tell them...i still don't have the guts to. I am however giving myself some time before i tell them. In African culture it's usually said...a lady dowry has to be in form of cows and goats..and it really makes me feel bad whenever i talk to my parents and they caution to 'take care'. I don't like them telling me that..it makes me feel like crying..since i know i have messed up already.

Eunicintah - posted on 09/10/2015

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Thank you so much Suzanne. I have a good paying job only that i am scared because my parents always tell me to take care and it makes me feel guilty, i stay in a different town. Again they have always wished i get married in a church wedding but now i don't see that happening, my boyfriend is not for the wedding idea at all, he doesn't like weddings at all.

Suzanne - posted on 09/07/2015

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First congrats are in order...two honey not alot of women now a days are married when they have a child or more... you should make it a happy exciting way to tell your family that you are expecting. .. though I can say usually the best time to tell anyone is after 12weeks
I was 25 at the time I had my first my dad looked at me and smiled (I thought he would be mad) I will never forget what he said to me
I'm proud of you ...I looked at him asked why you say that..he said because you waited till you were an adult to have a child...
I have four sisters and all included my mom had baby's by age 20....
I went to college and had a career before concieving and yes I was not and still Not married. .. and we now have a new little Boy..

To answer your questions about morning sickness. .. my first son I had None
My second son was total different I was Sooo Sick I had it almost whole pregnancy taking medicine from dr...
My sister had Three boy's all severe morning sickness. ..
Though my two sister's with daughters both had mild morning sickness. ..

Hey just a fun thought if u find out gender you should do something fun like have the tech write the sex on a paper put in envelope take to cake maker ask to make a frosted cake with
Inside pink for girl or blue for boy that way you can have a party to celebrate finding out the sex..
Again make the most of it telling people of your little blessing on the way....and finding out Boy or Girl

Jodi - posted on 09/07/2015

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I had no morning sickness with any of mine either - and I've had both genders.

Michelle - posted on 09/07/2015

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I've had 2 boys and a girl and have never had morning sickness. Enjoy it because I know women who have suffered terribly with morning sickness.
In regards to your parents, we don't know how they will respond as we don't know them. My only advice is that you are an adult and can make your own choices in life. I think you have done well to get to 27 before having a child. Hopefully they will just be happy that they are going to be grandparents.

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