Adoption

Catherine - posted on 06/08/2010 ( 9 moms have responded )

4

0

1

Everyone preaches about adoption instead of abortion but where are the babies? How does one adopt a baby without getting raped by the adoption profit industry out there? My husband and I want to adopt a baby but can't afford the 30K to 50K that is required.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Debbie - posted on 06/13/2010

10

114

0

My husband and I have two kids, both adopted as newborns....one is 3 and the other is just 4 weeks old!

FOSTERING ONLY ADOPTABLE CHILDREN is an option that is out there. You would only have children placed in your home that have no chance of being reunited with their families (which is the goal of foster parenting).

Go to a reputable adoption agency, tell them you want to start an adoption file and that you would like to have your home study done. You have to do this no matter how you decide to pursue your adoption.....Yes there is a cost, but if you do a little at a time then its a bit easier. Also if you actually have the agency 'look' for or 'keep you on a list' it will be more expensive......because they are doing most of the work...help yourself out as much as you can.

ALSO::: Did you know that you CAN RECLAIM SOME of the cost of your adoption on your taxes?? YES YOU CAN! So you are able to get some of your expenses back, but not all!

We let it be known wherever we were and with everyone we know that we wanted to adopt and BOTH of our kids came to us by someone contacting us because they spoke to someone who knew us. If for instance we had a friend or family member who came across someone that would mention that they knew someone who was expecting and wanted to give the child up for adoption they would take that opportunity to tell them about us....from that point, if someone was seriously wanting to find an adoptive family they would have the information needed to contact us or to contact the agency who would then contact us.

WE NEVER APPROACHED AN EXPECTANT MOTHER OR FAMILY...EVER. WE WERE FORTUNATE TO HAVE FRIENDS AND FAMILY THAT KEPT US IN MIND IF THEY HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO SHARE OUR STORY WITH SOMEONE THEY HAD ENCOUNTERED.....EX: FAMILY MEMBER'S FRIEND HAD A DAUGHTER THAT WAS PREGNANT AND 15 AND THE DAUGHTER WANTED THE CHILD TO BE ADOPTED.

No matter what, you have to have the agency involved, attorney's are involved and it isn't going to be 'cheap' as far as the fee's and things of that sort. Also depending upon the birth mom, you might have to pay hospital bills, doctor bills and things of that nature as well as the cost for providing an attorney for the birth mom....yep be prepared to pay for whatever it might be and then you will have a nice surprise if you DONT have to pay for something!

Our sons adoption was around 15,000, our daughter's will most likely be around the same, and we were able to get 10,000 of that back at tax time.....We were fortunate to have birth moms that were able to continue on their parents insurance which helped on our end for sure!

Don't be afraid to get things started....you never know what the situation might be for any birthmom!

REMEMBER AS WELL.....that many banking institutes offer ways to help out adoptive parents, so be sure to check that out!

Don't give up hope! We are an example of what CAN happen when all is given to GOD!

Wishing you the best!

This conversation has been closed to further comments

9 Comments

View replies by

J M - posted on 12/25/2012

122

0

15

To the original blog.... by Catherine.
I am not sure where you live however as you mention the profit industry, is that America?

Yes even where I live in a small country, 4, 000,000 and because of the numbers every yr being aborted to the size of this country is out of control.... over 18,000 aborted every year, but very few Adoptions, thus we and most who find themselves us, go over seas.

When we adopted there was absolutely NO expected payments to any one person, no way. Simple not Ethical to do so. International Adoptions done all through Government, so is free as to say, no paying for dossier work etc.( translations yes as that par paper work then translated done independent from our won country)

But we also get NO tax breaks as to say , as America seems to get when they Adopt.

In saying this, of corse its cost for rest of Adoptions details, if going over seas. From woe to go including screeds of the normal paper work took about 2- under3 yrs.( and was not baby adoption, rather older child but under 7 yrs old, has worked out very well -:) )

Cost to travel, food and accommodation, clothes for your Child/baby, passports etc, and payment for translations and Lawyers once of fee after Court all normal costs, thats for if adoption is out from own country.

And even if a In country Adoption stil have to pay for very minim court s costs.


( however when it comes to Adoption get NO Government $ help either) So very sad a lot may never get to be parents just because of initial cost of such a expense process, but could afford to continue the expected costs later ben a parent.

They is always $$ for when families are in a hard place and need assistance.

So although children need the very best, it should not seem only accessible to those who may be fortunate to cough up, and those who cannot "initially for process costs, but could afford to for the rest of a child life be great parents in all cares love protection etc..

We also have free Hospital care, but also Private care where you pay.

Catherine - posted on 03/07/2011

29

15

1

We adopted domestically and was very fortunante with our process. The whole process was under 20k and you get a tax credit then of 12K. We mainly saved up and paid it all back after tax time. Our BM was a homeless, drunk, prostitue and she chose to give her baby an excellant home with endless opportunties. I do agree that adoption is not for everyone but with today's society and how family treat children I strongly agree that those children should be given the right to be happy and well taken care of.

Abbie - posted on 06/13/2010

1,140

42

203

Catherine, thank you so much for posting this, I was actually thinking of posting something like this myself. WE have a 2 year old son, but chances look slim for us to conceive on our own again. So I have been considering adoption. So thank you for posting this, and I wish you all the luck in being abiel to adopt. I believe there are grants also out there to help parents in the adoption process

Becky - posted on 06/10/2010

288

9

38

There are THOUSANDS of kids in foster care that need to be adopted. Don't foster the kids that their parents still have rights to. Foster the ones that parents have already lost alllt their rights to and waiting to be adopted. If you contact your state foster care system they will help you. Just type in google. foster adoption in (your state) and it will help you learn more. This is what my husband and I are doing through the state of michigan.

Louise - posted on 06/09/2010

5,429

69

2321

Wow where in the world do you live? In England the process is long and alot of paperwork but the adoption is free. If you want a baby and not an older child you will have to wait a long time. There are lots of children out there that need a loving home. If you widen the age range you are likely to be successful. I can understand the lady that does not want to foster as it would break my heart to, to have to give back a child I have become attached to. You can foster on a short term basis for no longer than a couple of nights as well. This may give you the opportunity to see if you could find room in your heart for an older child. Good Luck with the adoption process!

Kelina - posted on 06/08/2010

2,018

9

235

My husband and I have been looking into it as well but we are in Canada and they might do things differently here. Here if you adopt a child through the government it's almost free except for the criminal record checks and doctor forms but if you go through an adoption agency it can cost up to 50 grand. Could you look into adopting a young child through your government? It might be cheaper adn that way you wouldn't have to deal with the heartbreak of possibly having to send a child home again. Here there are children as young as 1 1/2 or 2 years old that are up for adoption. Good luck!

Catherine - posted on 06/08/2010

4

0

1

My husband and I have a four year old but have been unable to have another child. We were kind of hoping to adopt a child younger. I have heard so many heartaches about fostering. I don't think that I can survive having a child in my home for 18 months and having then to give them back to the mother or father who neglected or abused them in the first place. It would kill me. I get attached easy and I am a very protective mother. Most state agencies seem to push foster/adoption only.

User - posted on 06/08/2010

147

25

20

If age isn't a huge issue you can become a foster parent and in many cases the foster relationship can become an adoption. I know many families that have adopted children this way. It is also a bit more affordable than trying to adopt a baby...goggle it for your state. It may be a great alternative for you :)

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms