Advice needed!!! Support welcomed!

Lacey - posted on 12/16/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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When I left my sons dad, I filed for child support immediately. Well the child support was supposed to be in effect August 15, 2012. He has since made 7 payments. He has the option to see him every other weekend, but fails to communicate when he’s coming to get him or if he’s coming at all. 100% of the time he doesn’t show up, or call. I have no contact with him whatsoever. I also don’t have a current address for him, I do know his moms address, and that he currently is in Pleasant Hill, MO.
My son’s dad has a violent past with drug abuse, theft, dealing, and chopping cars. In the 5 years we were together I saw things and lived things that no one should ever have to indure in a lifetime. I never felt safe.
Currently, he was car jacked and shot, before that he fell off a bridge at work, and then was hit by a car( which I later found out was a lie). Also yesterday morning I woke up to a phone call from his ex-girlfriend asking if I knew where my sons dad was. I said “No” and preceeded to ask why. She stated that he had broken into he apartment and stolen a bunch of things. With his past and numerous people looking for him, I do not feel safe with my son around him. He is not a vital part of my sons life, and I firmly believe him showing up every month or two will do more emotional harm and cause long terms psychological effects, then him not being there.
I am married to a wonderful man, who my son calls dad. He is the perfect person and is willing to adopt my son as his own. do you ladies think I have chance at getting sole p & L custody?

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/16/2013

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Well, then present that to your attorney.

However, even a person with a criminal past deserves to see and interact with the child that they helped create.

File for custody and support. Ask for supervised visitation. If you have enough documentation, that may be a good possibility. But as far as your current spouse adopting, I still think it would probably be a no go. That is, unless you can get the child's father to agree to sign his full parental rights away.

Lacey - posted on 12/16/2013

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I have police reports of theft and several witnesses with photographs of drug use.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/16/2013

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2015

Custody, perhaps.

Do you have any proof of what you've posted, or is it allegations and hearsay from others? If you have no proof of drugs, theft, etc, then the courts will allow him access. And, really, he does have a right.

Ask a family attorney about the adoption. I don't think it can happen unless the child's biological father willingly signs away his parental rights.

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