After a year of inconsistent visits here and there, dad wants him 3 nights a week. Feeling frustrated, confused, and empty.

Andrea - posted on 04/29/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




My son is 14 months now. The first year of his life his dad would come and go as he pleased, getting him maybe 3 or 4 nights a month. During this time he didn't pay support and I was constantly trying to get him to be involved in our son's life bc I wanted my baby to have a father. I finally realized that I can't force someone to be involved so I gave up on that and filed for child support. We got court papers in the mail the beginning of April for a court date of July 30. Every since those came in the mail, he wants him 3 nights a week. My son is my life, he is the reason for everything I do and now I feel like my life has been ripped right out from under me. I have this free time that I haven't had in a longgg time, and I don't even have any motivation to do anything because I've been so down that my baby is gone 3 nights a week. So instead of taking advantage of the alone time, all I want to do is sleep and lay around- and this is not like me at all. Typically I'm a motivated person and get things done, but I've been feeling so empty the past few weeks. It's such a vicious cycle. I don't know what to do? I don't want him gone 3 nights a week. Period. If I bring this up to him, it will be a drug out fight and I know exactly what he'll say, that he is his dad and should have the right to get him that often. Am I going to have to fight him in court? I can't even afford a lawyer and really have no idea what to expect when going into court in July, I didn't think it would come to this. Putting my feelings aside, I know deep down that he is better off with me for the majority of the time, but that having a father in the picture is very important also. I wonder if I should have never filed for child support and I wouldn't be feeling so empty bc I doubt he would be as involved as he is now, but then I would have to deal with the inconsistency, lies and no help financially. I'm so frustrated, confused and tired.


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Medic - posted on 04/29/2012




You do not have to give him that much. He is likely doing it so he can claim 50% and not pay support.

Michelle - posted on 04/29/2012




You do not have to give him 3 nights a week if you feel it is too much for your child my son only saw his dad for a few hours every other Saturday and Sunday with no over nights and 1 night during the week and our visitation was court ordered.

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