After reading and responding to some post on here I was wondering am I wrong to feel the way I feel about my daughter's other side of the family. I have been the sole provider all of her life and after things happened that broke me and her dad up while I was pregnant, I'm not very trusting when it comes to his decisions. I know my rights and I also know he has none but the right to visit. After going back and forth to court, I'm embarrassed because every judge wonders why we have to get the smallest things put in the order. Everything from any meds perscribed must be given, who house she had to be at, no smoking around her, etc...

Crystal - posted on 07/26/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Well I have had sole legal and physical custody of my daughter for years now but that was due to her dad filing for sole custody and wanting me to pay child support. He has done nothing but cause headache. After been awarded everything he has done nothing but tried to be on get back mode since. We have gone through so much but my daughter has gone through much more. I have read comments on different post about step parents and absent parents on what different people say and feel about the topic. I can't help but wonder am I wrong because when my daughter's about to be step mom came into the picture, I didn't trust her one bit. I had no clue who she even was until one day I get to the daycare and there is a female who I knew didn't work there holding her with a phone to her ear. I asked who she was but she ignored me. I went the hell off cause I couldn't believe the daycare would let a stranger just come in and interact with people's children. Then after my she was 4 she came home saying this woman slapped her in the face. Her dad lied and said he didn't know what my daughter was even talking about. Another time she said the woman's son and his friends beat her up and she was told not to tell me. So I was about to go to jail cause I was tired about hearing about how something was wrong when she was suppose to be with her dad.... The woman confirmed everything was true but said that her dad gave her permission to dicipline our daughter. Now there is a new woman and within a month felt like she should be added to pick up list, have access to medical info, be able to meet with teachers, etc... I'm going crazy cause I'm like I don't know you and if her dad doesn't have access to all of this than I sure as hell wouldn't even give her this access. When I tried to talk to him about it, this fool says it doesn't matter what I say when she is with him. I had to remind him that I am the one held responsible for her period. Ever since she was 2 and he let some dude watch her and she came home with blood coming from her vagina says "he touched my coo coo"... You already know a sista was bout to go to jail for shooting up her dad's house. Having something always wrong when she comes back home. We were always in the hospital from him smoking around her and not giving her her asthma meds... Meds to keep her fever down, watching who is sick when he has her cause she always seems to come back sick... I mean she is 6 now and has gone through much more than the average. We were never married and we broke up because he decided he wanted to go back to selling drugs and smoking them as well. I do know this because he thinks its cool to put up pictures of him doin this with my daughter in the back round. Now I'm stuck cause I know she loves her dad but I'm not trying to keep him from her but I really think supervised visits would be safe for her considering he will not change. With him going through women that seemed to think that because they get engaged it gives them rights to THINK they can do things or make decisions when it comes to my child. We have at least 12 more years of her being a minor, how the heck am I suppose to get her through this????

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Crystal - posted on 07/26/2012

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I have had sole legal custody since she was 1. The daycare did assure me that it would never happen again, he had her put her children in the daycare so she was there to pick up her son... I just told them that no one is to be interacting with my daughter that I don't know to put an end to it. Her school knows now but I have sent certified letter to the Prince George's County school legal team letting them know I will personally hold them responsible if anything happens or if she is taken out of school. We had an issue last sept cause his mother felt the need to take her out of class often. Because his visitation is every other weekend starting sat night at 7 to tues morning and mon morning to tues evening which I have tried to change now that she has been in school for 3yrs. The legal team sent me an email saying that he can legally have anyone pick her up on HIS days. I talked with a lawyer at the courthouse who called the school up saying if they couldn't read or something cause it clearly states in the order that I have sole legal and physical custody. He did make them aware if they allowed this to happen that I would have a lawsuit against the county. Thats how I feel, I have run out of options at this point other than to ask for supervised visits again. I was told something else had to happen for the court to take me serious. Which I think is ridiculous. She has already been molested, in an accident with one of his ex's who didnt even have a license, weed being found on her by the police but her dad said she must have pick it up off the ground and none was found on him so that charge was dropped, etc... I mean what else do they think will happen if this keeps going on...

Dove - posted on 07/26/2012

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What kind of visitation IS he allowed? If you have full legal custody then the school needs to be aware of this and ONLY people you allow to pick up your daughter can get her. If you had full legal custody back then you could've gotten the daycare in a whole lot of trouble.

I'm sorry. I'm trying to think of anything I can to help, but I'm really out of ideas at the moment.

I guess you just keep being a strong mom and not letting your daughter know how much her father bothers you.

Crystal - posted on 07/26/2012

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We haven't been since that issue though, I do have pictures now. I just got them recently within the past 2weeks but when I talked with so many attorneys they said that because it could be fake or he could as he had done in the past and say he got it off the internet and cropped him and my daughter in it.....

Crystal - posted on 07/26/2012

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I tried but the judge denied it. He said I needed the doctor to come to court with me. I did have a lawyer when I got custody but because I drained all money I had saved I couldn't afford one after that. We have been to court so many times that most of the judges know us by name.

Dove - posted on 07/26/2012

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Why didn't you go for supervised visits when she was 2? Or did you and some stupid judge denied it? If you have proof of all the things you are claiming has happened to your child, the photos, etc.... I can't believe a judge would not grant supervised visits.

Do you have a lawyer?

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