alone after 9 years

Tressa - posted on 03/23/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Was in a relationship for 9 years them recently split up.. Continued to mess around about a month after we went our separate ways and i got pregnant. Instead of trying to work things out and being together he chose to be with a girl he's cheated on me with before... To make matters worse WE STILL KEEP SLEEPING TOGETHER!I think Im trying to hope for us to get together. He won't go to my first Dr appt. Very hurt and depressed.

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Michelle - posted on 03/24/2013

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You can keep the communication open for your children but you can also stop him from sleeping with you!

You have to be strong and set the boundaries. Don't put yourself in a situation where he will sleep with you. Meet in public places for custody changeovers. You have to stand your ground and be strong!

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Onetraeh - posted on 03/24/2013

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Oh no tht makes it more complicated;try to free your mind from him as much as u can anyway & just be cold like ice becuz tht's wht he deserves.show no emotion & definitely never cry in front of him or nothing like tht;make him think tht u really don't gaf.anyway some people r so twisted tht they respond better to tht kind of behaviour so maybe he'll even come around after tht or when he understands tht u aren't going to put up with just anything & u demand respect!honestly he sounds just ruthless leaving his family to be with somebody else anyway so here's to hoping u don't give him another chance but wishing u the best no matter wht happens;just try & decide if he's a friend or foe & if he's a foe then u know wht time it is.all the bestest
Xxx

Tressa - posted on 03/23/2013

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The only bad thing about cutting all communication is that we have a six year Old together so we have to communicate for him. I know out would be 10x easier I'd I didn't have to see or talk to him.

Christine - posted on 03/23/2013

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That's a very tough situation and its heartbreaking that you may not be getting the support u need from him when u need it most. I can completely understand what it would be like to be pregnant and afraid of the future and the responsibility of this baby.
Right now your priority is your baby.. And slowly whether u know it or not, u are becoming this baby's mother. U are going to teach this child by the decisions u make and influence him/her with your values and beliefs about yourself.
I hope that u have your family and friends there to support u because in the end, it's better to not have the stress of an undependable ex boyfriend. Start to build your own self confidence as a mother. Acknowledge the ways u are independent and are capable of taking care of this baby with or without him.
Good luck! And take care

Onetraeh - posted on 03/23/2013

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I kind of know how u feel being attached to somebody after being with him for so long;it kind of happens naturally & it's sooo hard to let go of.but u know wht if he's making u feel bad & hurting your feelings u have to let go especially now if you're going to be a mother u have to take care of yourself & be in a good strong state of mind for your baby.so show him the same respect tht he's showing u which is zero & let him go;the rules aren't different for him just becuz he's a man.gather strength from wherever u can such as friends & family & I would cut off all communication with the guy if for nobody but yourself;change your phone number whtever u have to do to cut your attachment to him becuz right now u may not think it's a big deal but you're going to wake up one day soon & wonder why u have self esteem issues becuz u allowed him to treat u like shit.so save yourself the heartache becuz trust me if he can be with somebody else tht he cheated on u with there's no telling wht he can do & @ the very least he sounds like a mean & ruthless person & u shouldn't have no time for a mean person;there's no excuse.save yourself!& your mind state & oh ya don't dwell on the fact tht he is with somebody else becuz tht's gonna hinder the process & don't think tht she's better or prettier than u!I'm sure we could all go & fuck somebody else but lets leave tht up to these slut men who r obviously aliens from mars with no emotions.I know u would probably rather not be a single mother but get rid of him!keep your heart pure for your baby...try not to be hurt becuz then you're letting him win & he is a loser!ok maybe I was venting a little bit for myself there too but I hope I helped a little bit & be strong & blessed & keep your head up ok
Onnne

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