Am I being Selfish?

Sharon - posted on 07/17/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Ladies, I have had a very emotional break up, he has been on and off with me 4 times now, by just saying he is not ready to commit to a relationship. Now I am an emotional wreck and blame myself for having taken him back after he dropped me so many times especially everytime we argued. He was not supporting his son financially when we dated because i wanted him to try to settle his debts for us to get a place, etc. However since he has been ill treating me everytime he wants out, I pleaded with him to support me financially and he is, even though i have to remind him all the time,its not even half what it costs to support our son, but he is at a very bad financial state. He lives by borrowing money at loan sharks (one of the reasons we fought constantly). He sometimes makes promises to spend time with our son and just never pitches, so I have had it with dealing with his inconsistency and empty promises, sometimes when he does come he is always in a company of friends. I have stopped answering his phone calls, I am really torn and tired with his behavior. Does my action of taking time out make me a bad person in this case?

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Kristi - posted on 07/18/2013

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Good lord, no! It means you found your backbone and realized WELCOME was not actually tattooed on your ass to be a doormat anymore! ; )

Finding your way out of an abusive (be it physical, psychological, emotional) relationship is no easy task. It's a viscous cycle. If you are able to set yourself apart from that then go for it. Gather all your resources for support. Friends to chat with or have play dates with, hobbies, any kind of positive distraction that will keep your mind off of your ex and focused on what good you have right in front of your face. It's hard, of course. But, it can be done.

Your original question-- Does my action of taking time out make me a bad person in this case?

It makes you brave. It makes you courageous. It makes you amazing.

I hope that answers your question. ; )

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