Am I doing something wrong?

Amber - posted on 01/30/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )




Hi all! I am the mother of a 2 1/2 year old boy...we started potty training at 2 and it seems like we have gotten no where! I'm not sure what to do. I have tried getting him his own potty, I got a seat that sits on the "big" potty, I have tried stickers,I have taken him potty with and with daddy, letting him pick his own underwear and offering toys and movies if he goes...all with no results. I think he understand the idea of the potty because he will go sit but he never goes. I have caught him a couple times but only because I saw his "pooping face" as we call it and got him to potty just in time. I have noticed recently that he pulls on himself and when I ask if he has to go he says no. I take him anyways...but nothing happens. I got him up this morning, we went to sit on the potty and I noticed he was completely dry!! So I know he had to go, he sat for about 10 minutes and did nothing so I took him off, not 5 minutes later I heard him say pee pee potty so I went to sit him back down but he had already gone!! So I think he gets what he is supposed to do but he just won't do it. He wont even tell me when he has to go. I have seen a lot of moms who let their child be naked all day but that is something I am not okay with. So I am hoping for some advice that doesn't involve that. Any help would be appreciated!!!


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Ariana - posted on 01/30/2013




My son pretty much 'knew' how to go potty but wouldn't actually use it. It's best to just leave him with the diaper and drop the issue for a month or so. After a month if he's showing more signs that he's ready try again. I know a bunch of parents who said their boys didn't potty train until they were 3. My son didn't start actually using it until he was 3 so just give him a break and try again in a month or so.

Denikka - posted on 01/30/2013




I'm with Michelle. He just doesn't seem ready yet.

Keep encouraging. Take him in with you when you go. Encourage him to sit then. If he says he needs to go potty, take him and let him sit, even if he's already just gone.
Control can be a huge issue for kids at that age. He may not actually know he has to go until he's literally going. It's also confusing for him because going outside his diaper has always been a big *no no* and now that's what you want him to do. Potty training is not just about training a kid to go on the potty, it's also about UNtraining them from going in the diaper.

I started what I call *potty training* as soon as my kids could walk (about 9mo). I would take them into the bathroom with me, let them throw a piece of TP into the toilet and then let them flush. Get them used to the potty (those flushes can be pretty scary at times :P) Then, at 18mo, I got them a potty (I also switched to pull ups to make it easier for them to pull up and down for themselves. I encouraged my kids to change themselves when they were just wet). I would encourage them to sit on it whenever we were in the bathroom, for any reason. When I was in there, just before a bath, etc. No pressure. Just go sit on the potty for a couple minutes.
At about 2 years, I started calling attention to the sensations. Asking if they needed to go potty. Letting them know that I knew their *pooping face* XD (Are you pooping? Yes, I think you are. Let's go sit on the potty) Still sat on the potty any time we were in the bathroom.
And any time they did happen to go on the potty, it was a big deal. For the first while, they even got to call daddy at work to tell him (they LOVED the phone and a call to dad was about the biggest thing ever, even though we live with him :P). Lots of clapping, high fives, praise, etc.

My son has a set back for about 6 months due to a change in living arrangements, but was fully potty trained (and using the full sized potty) not long after he turned 3 (night trained too). My daughter is currently 2 and well on her way.
I let my kids lead the way. I know lots of people talk about how they potty trained their kid in only a couple weeks or whatever, but that ONLY works if your child is really ready. Otherwise, if you push too hard, you can end up with more setbacks and more problems.

Michelle - posted on 01/30/2013




He's obviously not ready. Stop trying and let him give you the message that he's ready.

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