Am I pregnant?

Vanessa - posted on 09/29/2014 ( 19 moms have responded )

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I am 20 years old, I just had my first child about 8 weeks ago and i started having sex at 5 weeks but I wasn't suppose to I've had sex about 5 times since 5 weeks until now 8 weeks, my postpartum check up is on Friday that's when I'll be getting on birth control but those 5 times me and my boyfriend were sexually active we used the pull out method, ca I be pregnant?

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Dove - posted on 09/29/2014

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But Sarah... you are fertile before your first period returns... and by then it's too late. I know people who have done all that... and had their period return as early as 6 weeks (so they were fertile before that time).

For the record... every post that contradicts yours is NOT an attack on you. It's just someone w/ a different view stating that as well.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/29/2014

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of course you can be. You neglected to use contraceptives, and you ignored your physician's orders.

Myths such as "you are unlikely to be pregnant because of the hormones of bf"...are just that, MYTHS. You CAN become pregnant whilst breastfeeding, and it is NOT an approved method of birth control.

You are an adult. tell boyfriend to use his hand, or use a condom. He doesn't have to have sex to 'handle his needs'. If he's an ass, file for support and custody and find a better man.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/30/2014

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To Sarah: (NOW its directed at you ;-) )

You did not cite 3 separate studies, you didn't even really cite 1: " Harvard, Dr. Sears, Planned Parenthood (perhaps the hugest lobbyists for birth control) all recognize LAM" You stated that those 3 entities 'recognize' LAM. Not that a study was done (my apologies for misreading)

You then pronounce that it's 'not likely' that one would be pregnant after having unprotected sex whilst breastfeeding. Honey, it's VERY likely, just as it is at any other time you have unprotected sex...actually, it's been determined to be more likely, because women don't feel they're fertile if they're not menstruating.

No one is attacking you, no one is fussing. Merely pointing out discrepancies, or disagreeing with another poster is not abuse, its discussion. No one has to agree on anything, no one is forced into anything.

OH, one more thing? People responding to a post, telling the OP to stand up for herself when she doesn't want to have sex prematurely after birth is not abuse of any kind, it is women supporting a woman who states that her partner wasn't 'willing' to wait for the prescribed time period. A partner like that...well, no one needs a narcissistic ass around when they're recovering from the birthing experience.

Dove - posted on 09/29/2014

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Sarah... I've known Shawnn for quite a while now and the only one making a fuss here... is you. The back and forth discussion... is what happens here. If you post something that someone disagrees with... they will (many times) dispute it. It has nothing to do with YOU.

And no... sex at 5 weeks PP does not scream abuse. I've seen people 'brag' about having sex the DAY after they gave birth. Quite frankly I think they are bonkers... but I've seen many, many, many people advocate for sex way prior to the 6-8 week PP check up... because they WANTED sex.

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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Vanessa, sorry to get off track. Good luck at your appointment on Friday. Have you done a home test?

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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Ok, this is my last comment on the issue....If you quote what I say, then your comments are directed to me, To clarify: I NEVER said government funded, I never said it was effective birth control, and I don't endorse it as birth control.
Perhaps, I should have brought it up to someone who has newborn and wants to conceive as a reason they are not conceiving.
I didn't have half a brain working after my first but I sure as heck knew how long ago he nursed. I worked so friggin hard to get my baby on the breast that I did not care that at five months he wouldn't take a bottle. I nursed, I did not pump, I never skipped a feeding and my baby was 13 mos when I got my first period. Do I think I could have conceived in that time? NO and I had many opportunities!
Again, I do not endorse this a birth control (my face is turning blue repeating myself) I am just saying that it is a legitimate phenomenon. Vanessa asked if she could be pregnant, I said possibly. The likelihood decreases if her baby is exclusively at the breast. If there is a flaw in that statement, I don't care; it is my opinion. If it isn't yours, fine.
The issue at hand that everyone seems to be dogging this poor girl about is why is she having intercourse, unprotected intercourse at five weeks? That screams abuse!
I am done, feel free to say what you want.....but do your research first.
I did, I never said you can't get pregnant within a few months of giving birth, I site "Irish twins" in my first post. I never said if you are nursing you won't conceive, I just said it was less likely. I sited three legit studies of LAM, and defined the criteria. I don't know what the fuss is about? I am not out on every site advocating not using birth control! I told Vanessa, it was not likely she conceived in the last three weeks. Nothing more!

Dove - posted on 09/29/2014

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Newborns nurse once every 4 hours? Not in my world. Heck, my son didn't go longer than 4 hours w/out nursing til he was a year and a half.... and I STILL got my stupid period back when he was 2.5 months old. I got jipped. lol

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/29/2014

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Sorry, Sarah, never once attributed a statement directly TO YOU.

That being said, did your government funded study bother to actually say how inaccurate the method is, and publish disclaimers as to that? If not, it wasn't a thorough study.

Furthermore, how many women do YOU know that actually are going to be THAT specific with their timing? Especially with a newborn...feeding schedule is all over the place...it may be once every 4 hours...but then again, may be once every 6 because that kid's a great sleeper....or they may get desperate and supplement...

Not to mention the fact that its only ONE study amongst many...and most ahve proved the other way. So, that being said, how many women DO you know that used that method successfully? I know more that have been unsuccessful believing the myth

Cheers!

Dove - posted on 09/29/2014

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Well Sarah... if you knew people that got pregnant w/in 2 months of giving birth you might call it a myth too. ;)

Vanessa - posted on 09/29/2014

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Thanks for your guys is helpful comments, I'll keep every one of them in mind.

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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I get that, but to debunk something valid as a myth isn't fair either. I never once advised someone to rely on nursing as birth control, I just said it was unlikely.
I was one of the first persons to reply to this post, and my response ....Yes, it's possible you could be pregnant.
And, Dove I get it, maybe I take things too seriously but when someone chooses to quote me and then basically say I don't know what I am talking about, I get defensive.

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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Ok, I was hoping to support Vanessa and not enter it this ridiculous debate. I never, to anyone, have endorsed breastfeeding as birth control. However, Harvard, Dr. Sears, Planned Parenthood (perhaps the hugest lobbyists for birth control) all recognize LAM.
Lactation Amenorrhea Method is valid. While I do NOT endorse it as a method of birth control, and I was quite specific in my post, it is not a myth. The criteria: You must nurse every 4 hrs at minimum during the day and 6 hr at night, with not one single drop of supplementation, your baby must exclusively be at the breast, no pumping to bottle, your baby is under six months of age and you do not have a period. IF you meet that criteria, your body secrets gonadotropin releasing hormone (GnRH), which prevents your menstrual cycle from beginning and therefore prevents ovulation.
Please Note: I do not endorse this as contraception. I do recognize the millions of dollars put into these studies and note the validity of each study.
Please don't quote me and tell me what I say is a myth.
Have any of you, thought for one minute that perhaps Vanessa is in a controlling abusive relationship? You all have been very quick to call her childish, and weak and to refuse her partner. Well, from an abused woman; that is not always an option. How about we all put on our thoughtful caps and put ourselves in her shoes?
She's five weeks postpartum, nursing, probably exhausted and sore, don't you think she'd refuse him or demand condoms if she felt she could?
Anyone who wishes to quote me and call what I say a myth; do your homework and read my full post first Like I said LAM is not foolproof, but it is a true phenomenon.

Dove - posted on 09/29/2014

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You could very well be pregnant... and you are also at a good risk of getting an infection by having sex too early. If you don't want to get pregnant... use birth control or don't have sex. Only you can control that.

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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No, I understand that you don't want to get pregnant and you don't seem like you are "trying" too either. You probably can't even fathom managing another right now.
I think it is highly unlikely that you would be pregnant this soon especially with the hormones of bf. You may not get your period back until you wean but like I said, don't count on you not being able to conceive.
I am a little worried for you. Did you want to have sex just 5 weeks out? If you had a vaginal birth, I imagine it might have hurt. Not to mention what your breasts probably feel like these days too! If your boyfriend refuses to use birth control, you will have to and I don't think a diaphragm can be used so soon after delivery. Hormonal bc, like the pill or NuvaRing can affect your milk supply.
Please take care of yourself! Maybe if your boyfriend comes to your follow up with you the doctor can help work out a plan with both of you.

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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That sounds like a child's excuse.....boyfriends acts like he knows it all..... You are an adult and are doing adult actions. If you don't want another then be an adult. You now have an 8 week old that you also have to think about and can't just make decisions on "because he said so". I know that can add complications to your relationship, but if he does not want to be an adult in the situation then you need to be even more so the adult for both you and your child.

Vanessa - posted on 09/29/2014

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No I'm not trying to get pregnant I know it seems like it because I'm not using protection but my boyfriend acts like he knows it all and yes I am breastfeeding. Thank you:)

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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It's possible. How do you think "Irish twins" are created? Irish twins are sibling born within twelve months of each other. I guess you'll find out on Friday. Maybe use condoms until then, unless of course you want to have a baby again. Also, are you nursing? I know it is possible to get pregnant when you are nursing but I think it decreases the odds a bit especially the first few months. I do not advocate bf as a form of birth control! Keep us posted.

Sarah - posted on 09/29/2014

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yes you could very well be pregnant. Sometimes it is best to listen to the doctors. Besides being pregnant having sex too early after birth can damage your body as your body has not healed from the birth.

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