An irresponsible father

Elizabeth - posted on 09/27/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I have a daughter of 3.5yrs and l left his father after realizing that he was too unfaithful to me. I tried to talk to him politely and endure too much of his extravagance but worse of all is when l came to learn that he was having an affair with his sister in law and one of his nephew. I could not endure this any more so l decided to leave him that was October last year(2014). I have been taking care of my daughter alone since then and now he wants us to reconcile the issue but worse of all he abuses me sometimes through message. l never want to separate my daughter from his father so l use to allow him to see her sometime but now l feel that l need to divorce him because l don't see the logic of reconcile with him while he doesn't seem to change.

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Lisa - posted on 09/28/2015

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There is a lot of things that need to be dealt with here. First of all, did you mean that he is having an affair with his sister-in-law and niece? How old is the niece? Does he want to reconcile with you or just the fact that he wants to see his daughter? Do you feel that she would be safe with him unsupervised? If he is abusive to you in texts, is he abusive to you when you see him? So many questions need to be answered. Can you seek counseling? Find a third party who can help you sort out your thoughts and feelings? Here is a place you can call for a free counselor call back. http://bit.ly/1DiYyPl

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Michelle - posted on 09/28/2015

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Get yourself a lawyer and file for divorce, custody, visitation and child support.
You don't need someone like that in your life but you need to make sure that you are doing everything you can to encourage a relationship between your daughter and her Father.

Sarah - posted on 09/27/2015

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Why on earth would you tolerate someone having an affair with a male relative ? Divorce him unless he enthusiastically advocates therapy for himself. What good is he to you at this point except your daughter's father? Encourage him to be active in her life but rid him from your life and move on! If his nephew was underage, then he is a predator and should not have access to any child at all!

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