Any advice for a mom having 2 children only one year and a couple months apart?

Stacey - posted on 12/09/2010 ( 12 moms have responded )

2

16

0

I have a one year old son and I am now 6 months pregnant with my second child. My son is just learning how to walk and he is very busy I am very nervous about how I am going to deal with the arrival of my daughter because my son takes up so much of my energy how am I going to have enough time and energy for both my children and not feel like I am nigglecting either of them? Any advice from moms in a similar sitchuation would be awesome. Thanks.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Deanna - posted on 12/09/2010

56

14

5

I had three boys under the age of 3 when my third was born. Life is crazy but keep them busy and involve your oldest as much as possible. When baby is sleeping do something special with your oldest child. This reduces jealousy and he will be more likely to play on his own when you need to deal with baby care. Be sure to use your support system. My mom would come over on Tuesday and Friday to let me get some sleep. Be sure to get out of the house. It will make your oldest more content and you won't feel stir crazy. Hope this helps. Just be sure to enjoy them while they are young. It only happens once.

Crystel - posted on 12/09/2010

22

49

2

My younger 2 boys are 15 months apart and I did feel like I neglected my middle son. I felt bad because my oldest had almost 2 years by himself and my middle didn't get to be the baby for very long. It was hard in the beginning, but he did bond with his daddy when I had my youngest. Now that they are 8 1/2 and 10, they are pretty much like raising twins. They are always together and are lost without one another. When you have them so close together, you might as well treat it like twins. They will hopefully have a terrific relationship when they get older for being so close. I wish you luck and you will totally survive.

[deleted account]

coffee! lol. my daughter was 15 1/2 months when my son was born, and im just getting used to no sleep... hes 2 months now. let your mom or mil take a kid for a couple hours and just cuddle with the other. forget about housework every day. i clean the kitchen once a day, everything else gets done when i get around to it. sometimes its gross, but the kids are more important. let the older one "help" like getting diapers and small stuff he/she can handle. i have a pack n play in the living room that my son hangs out in, naps in during the day so if i need to do something hes still right there. try not to let yourself get stressed out, it is exhausting, but you can do it. for the first 3 weeks i cried every day just from being so tired and frustrated because the kids were wearing me out. my husband told me not to worry about everything so muh, and as long as the kids are healthy and generally happy, thats all that matters. i cant really think of anything else right now, but you can pm me if you have any questions maybe i can answer. good luck and congratulations!

Sherri - posted on 12/09/2010

9,593

15

391

Mine are 18mo's apart. I just set them as close to possible on the same schedule same feedings such as snack, meals for the older and a feed for the baby. Same nap schedules so I could rest too. Line up for diaper changes so I was only doing things for both once. I did this as much as humanly possible to make life as easy as possible with two babies.

Kimber - posted on 12/09/2010

20

15

3

My kids are 23 months apart ( a little bit more of a difference than yours) and while I was pregnant I was absolutely terrified that they were going to kill me. I wait tables and I had a lady talking to me with older children that were also 23 months apart. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I'm not going to lie, the first year sucks." She was right but you will find you are stronger than you ever imagined possible. Just remember to set up a support system, whether it be your family, friends, or finding programs like "Mommy's day out." You will survive it and maybe your son will be like mine was and absolutely fall in love with his sister. Just remember they do grow up and it is not going to be so hard forever! Good luck!

12 Comments

View replies by

Sherri - posted on 12/09/2010

9,593

15

391

Just wanted to point out I wasn't exhausted. I also worked full time and there were NO jealousy issues with my older son.

Kristen - posted on 12/09/2010

180

18

19

I would also like to point out that my kiddos never had a jealousy issue. Everyone is different so be careful not to compare or expect the same. Like I said, just take it one day at a time and you will be fine.

Christy - posted on 12/09/2010

2,218

41

438

My kids are 14 months apart and the first year was hell. The older one napped, the younger one napped whenever. Older one ate on a schedule, younger one NO. It took a good year to get them on the same schedule (eating, sleeping, etc). I hardly remember the first year of my youngest's life, LOL. Your older one will be jealous at first, but over time he/she will forget that they were ever an "only" child. My kids fight but are always asking about the other when one is gone to school or mother's day out. They are 3 1/2 (son) and 2 yrs 4 months old (daughter). It's a lot better now! You'll be ok!!!!!

Kristen - posted on 12/09/2010

180

18

19

My children are 16 months apart and I wouldnt trade it for anything. I didnt think it was that much more difficult than having 1. Its almost like having twins, you just do everything double. I actually think it helped my little one to speak better and learn faster. (Not that I expected her too) Now that they are (almost) 3 and 4, they do everything together. They always have a playmate which actually helps me to get things done around the house while they entertain each other. I was the opposite of Alison, I would forget that my daughter was only 2 because she developed so much faster and acted like my 4 year old. I have to remember that she is still little and learning. Sometimes I expect to much out of her. The best advice I can give is to just give each of them there own special mommy time and just take it one day at a time. Dont overwhelm yourself with what ifs. There is no point in worrying about something untill you need to.

Alison - posted on 12/09/2010

2,753

20

471

One day at a time. My girls are about 22 months apart and I found the first year very challenging. I even had the oldest in daycare most days.
One thing that is very important is to remember that your son is still a baby and you should treat him that way. There were moments when I expected too much of my oldest and when I shifted my expectations, we were both less stressed.

Krista - posted on 12/09/2010

8

106

0

i just had my third baby 10 weeks ago... i already hav two and they youngests are 10 months and 3 weeks apart.... its not all that bad... i hav to keep him up on the table or in playpen when connor is up... that way he isnt smacking the baby or hurting him... it takes a little to get use to but hey do what works for u... and we kissed sleeping goodbye when we had kids... the kids all adjust themselves so no worries about the time spent with them all cause they do just fine and they let u know when they neeed u the most.... good luck and feel free to msg me anytime

Felicia - posted on 12/09/2010

8

23

1

If u are a stay at home mom set up a daycare system for your kids and dont forget naptime

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms