Anyone else have problems with strangers touching/ kissing your baby?

Cherise - posted on 05/12/2010 ( 19 moms have responded )

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I dont know if anyone else is like me in this department but Im a big germaphobe. With that said, I have this huge issue with people touching or kissing my baby on the face and I dont really know how to address the issue without sounding mean or rude. I have friends that come over to visit the baby and think that they can do the same things that I do with my son such as kissing him on his cheeks or mouth or touching him all in his face. I also have this issue with strangers doing it as well. For instance, today I was put in an EXTREME awkward position. I went to go see this lady for an appointment and I brought my 7 month old son with me. Well, I put my son on his blanket that i layed out on the floor so i didnt have to hold him during my appointment. Well i guess my son had noticed the ladys red toe nail polish And he was trying to go over there to touch them. I saw what he was about to do and i pulled him back onto his blanket. Well she decides that she wants to play with my son while conducting my appointment by taking her foot out of her sandle and starts to nudge my son on his leg with her feet! On the inside i felt like screaming! But I tried to be nice and move my son further away from her. But she didnt get the hint and began to do it again while saying "its ok, i dont mind him touching my feet. I like it!" I was just shocked that she was even doing this. I really didnt know what to say... I just grabbed my son off the ground and held him till the appointment was over.



So my question is, What do you say to people who do these things without being rude about it?

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Krystle - posted on 05/12/2010

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I don't have that problem at all. But if you do not feel comfortable with anyone kissing and touching your child constantly. Just ask them not to but in a loving way some still might get offended but just explain that they are still young and they have not had all there shots. Its a new mother thing so dont ever feel bad that you ask somone that. I had a sign that i stuck on my child car seat when they were first born it said please wash your hands before touching me. I believe you can find that sign in target,walmart or any baby shop. That helped me out a great deal and i prevented alot of people touching my baby. Also too many ppl in the baby's face can cause them to develop cholic cause too much air can be between the baby and the person who is holding he/she. So just explain that u are a new mom and you don't want the baby being kissed on by every especially those who wear perfume it can cause the baby's face to break out so just look at it in that perspective. Look for that sign it helped me tons. Good luck!

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Brooke - posted on 09/27/2011

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ok lol I didn't read the whole thing... why would some one think its ok to touch a baby with there foot lol thats an act you do with a dog! but as far as the germs go again I dont have a problem..

Brooke - posted on 09/27/2011

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I don't actually have a real problem.. my daughter who is 2 1/2 is a very healthy little girl and I believe it's because we havn't sheltered her. Starting from a young age humans have to adapt to survive.
Also did you know that in one drop of saliva there are millions of bacteria, all it takes is 1 of those to make a person sick. So if someone sneezes near you there is a chance if they are carrying germs that you will get them!! The body gradually builds a barrier.. only if it is given the chance to be close to sch germs.

Monica - posted on 09/27/2011

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OMG! I have the same problem with that. People need to respect what the parents likes or dislikes but they dont and I have an issue on approching them also, so I totally understand what you are saying.

Jasmine - posted on 11/04/2010

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If a stranger came up to you and kissed and held your hand ......would you allow this or would smack him on the cheek! hmmmmmmm same with babies... its rude to touch a baby that you dont know...say hi to baby but dont touch.

Rozetta - posted on 05/16/2010

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That is just gross! I like feet, but I don't want people playing with my child with them! I am not a germaphobe, and I heard from my doctor and other places that some germs are good for your baby. They help to build up their immune systems. I would tell whoever is about to or has kissed or touched that you don't want them to touch or kiss your child. Good luck!

Rozetta - posted on 05/16/2010

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That is just gross! I like feet, but I don't want people playing with my child with them! I am not a germaphobe, and I heard from my doctor and other places that some germs are good for your baby. They help to build up their immune systems. I would tell whoever is about to or has kissed or touched that you don't want them to touch or kiss your child. Good luck!

Sarah - posted on 05/16/2010

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i personally dont have that kind of problem my kids read my body language if me and my kids are around strangers they waite for me to give the okay to talk but . i really dont put off the vibe that its okay to even touch my children if i dont know who they are? no i would be the one to decide who touches who , and most people tend to keep their distance from a momma bear and her cubs it should only go as far as a freindly hi how are you, then go on about your biz

Rebecca - posted on 05/12/2010

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iv never had someone try to kiss my baby but i would be very creeped out if they did unless it was close family i think that a stranger doing it is stepping over the boundries but when it comes to people touching her it doesnt bother me as its always been playful and within boundries theyev always been nice people to i thik if some one creepy and dirty was to id just move away i like the fact my daughters not scared of people as i think it can hinder them in a way of confidence i only look at things in this way as i can remember when i was lil and i was always scared of people and very shy because i never had the chance to interact within reason but that was onli because we lived in a very small town and there wasnt day care or playgroup so u could imagine me going to kindy for the first time and being scared of everyone

Michelle - posted on 05/12/2010

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My 4 year old just loves babies and wants to kiss everyone she meets! I have taught her to ask mommy first then kiss baby on the back of the head, that way we don't share mouth germs. This has been much appreciated by other moms that I meet and myself. I'm not worried about strangers touching her because I don't give them the opportunity.

Lisa - posted on 05/12/2010

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I have the same problem with people I dont know tuching my child. Even just her hand I hate it. I tell them point blank not to tuch her. Its your child who cares what a stranger thinks of you. If someone says something to me I tell them I dont want her growing up thinking its ok to talk to/tuch strangers

Becky - posted on 05/12/2010

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I was in the hospital once and my husband and daughter came to visit me. The old lady in the bed next to me just walked up and kissed my daughter on the lips.. I couldnt believe that just happened! Ever since than I just tell you can look but not touch and I will sometimes let them play with her feet.. Never her hands because she puts them in her mouth and I dont know what kind of germs other people have.

Jennifer - posted on 05/12/2010

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My friends touch my baby girl and I have no problem with it.They are your friends after all.If there is a reason why you don`t want them to touch the baby you may have so kind of problem.And I don`t want to be mean when saying this.But they are your friends. There maybe is a reason why and you should try to find out.You could just ask everyone to wash their hands before touching the baby.

Strangers are a different thing.I do not allow to touch my girl.Well they can touch her hand but that is it.I would just tell them to not touch you baby and I would not care being rude to them.They could at least respect that choice and ask if they can touch the baby.But I would certainly not allow strangers to kiss my baby.You do not know where the strangers mouth was before the kiss.They might have some kind of desease.

I hope I helped a little!

Nichole - posted on 05/12/2010

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Ew her feet?!! I just tell people not to touch my baby. He gets sick alot, I don't need him getting sick anymore. I absolutely do not let anybody but me & his daddy kiss his face. And only family may kiss his head. I'm very germaphobic with him. Strangers are NOT to touch him at all, so when I see them reaching I pull him away, and ask them not to. Usually they are offended but I don't care, I don't want them touching him.

Katie - posted on 05/12/2010

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I would just try and tell them outright. People need to understand that you shouldn't just go up to a baby and start to hug them if you don't know that baby. My daughter (18 months) walks up to strangers all the time and wants them to pick her up, all women though. It makes me really uncomfortable and I am so shocked that these women actually pick her up and they don't know me or her. I've learned to just grab my daughters attention and keep it off of women around us so she doesn't run up to them and ask up. But still if a strange baby comes up to you and asks for up then you shouldn't pick them up you could just bend down and say hello or something.

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I don't have that problem. But if I feel a stranger is violating my space & my child's space I'm not polite or shy to just put them in their place.
After she said she didn't mind him touching her feet, I would have said very plainly "well I do". It's that easy. Or when someone is approuching my baby & I can tell they want to touch, I just say "don't touch the baby, please." People are usually offended, but so what, that's their issue, not yours.
As far as friends go, I don't know what to tell you. I really don't mind friends loving on my baby.

Blackwood - posted on 05/12/2010

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I have no idea what too say, there are certain people that it doesn't bother me like his Aunts and Uncles (our sister and bro in laws), his grandparents, but other then that it bothers me too. I HATE it when people put thier fingers anywhere near his face and especially his mouth. The feet thing would have drove me nuts. You could just simply say, I know this sound silly to you and I really don't mean to offend you but I'm a bit of a germaphobe and it makes me uncomfortable when you do that. Or what I've done in the past, is when I notice someone close that I see on a regular basis do it, I tell a "story" of how I hate it when people put there hands near my son's face with all the stuff going around these days. Also try to remember these people arenot doing it too be mean and depending on the age of the person, things might have been different when they had little ones. I'm trying too work past this issue and relieze he may get a cold and that in the end, it's not life threating, but it's hard when something gross like someones elses feet come into play, lol. best of luck

*Lisa* - posted on 05/12/2010

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Ewwwwwwwww! Seriously! Ewwwwww!!!

I'm not a germaphobe but I don't like strangers kissing or touching my baby either. I don't want to offend them but I just kind of smile and slowly pull him out of reach.

Again. Ewwwww!!!!! (I HATE FEET)

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Ahhh.No way thats not right,i would of lost it.You have to say it out right,thats the only way,you dont have to be rude but tell them no.Your son should of bit her lol only joking she wouldnt of done that again though.



On my first i had people kiss my child,family it was okay to me,strangers no way.My second kid i gave my look lol it worked i gave my look and the backed off.I dont know what to say other than say it out right respectfully.You have the right to.I didnt have the balls to do it on my first and i had to live with it but second time i meant business and my look is enough to back them off from kissing her.

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