Anyone out there dealing with their husbands ex wife?

Tina - posted on 07/08/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I stay in the back ground, try to support, help out where I can with my 8 year old step daughter, that is a pleasure to have. 6 years ago, we seem to get on, the ex was always pleasant. Now, it is a nightmare, dictating, demanding. difficult, sends upsetting email, lies about me and things we have said when she phone our house. Yet she has a new man. She is going on holiday, we are having my husbands little girls to stay for nearly 2 weeks, and still she is not happy with us. Last week she called me said some really horrible things about how I am not the childs mum and to stay out of details concerning the holiday, even though I am having her for some of the time, yet she lied to my husband and said she did not call!

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Sarah - posted on 05/08/2014

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Yes oh goodness Yes! I feel for you honestly I know how this feels. My stepdaughter was 1 when I got into a relationship with her father. His ex wife has had it out for me since day one. It has been 13 years now that has passed and it's only gotten worse. We have been in and out of court, counselors you name it. So she decided last year that because we wanted to attend the open house she wasn't having it. She says her and her new boyfriend were going instead. Well my husband said no we will be there.. Then she decided to keep his daughter from us because of it. He recorded all the wknds he went to pick her up and didn't get her. He noted when he went to her school to eat lunch w/ her and she started locking herself in the school bathroom. Didn't help that her mother had been slandering him all over FB when their daughter was on there as her friend. She would make up lies like he's a dead beat.. Or he puts us before his child. Even though it was her that was keeping her from him for no reason whatsoever. His daughter had been separated from him because of all this, and it showed how much the mother talked badly about us in front of her. We finally got her into court, but the judge ordered Co- parenting & counseling. Which isn't going well... We have missed her bday... He only gets her Sat & Sun 10-6 because the counselor says it needs to be a transition. His daughter now says she doesn't want to come over or have a relationship with her half sister her father or me. His ex's boyfriend now husband was just sent to prison for 4 yrs! So this child has no other father figure but her father and because his ex screams cries says she won't make her daughter go.. It's making it worse. I finally decided to go in to see this counselor, and me and his child have a really good relationship.. I thought.. Well his child is saying I'm stealing stuff asking her to put stuff in my purse at stores?!? Also she told the counselor that I looked her in the face and said I love you but I can only love you 50% because I hate your mom?! Lord .. This child is 14 yrs old and knows what's she is saying is lies.. Why would she say these things?! How am I to defend myself against a child's accusations? Do I ask to take a lie detector test?! It's all so much to deal with! We also have been blocked from every social site the child has... She refuses to let us call the child's phone so we got her a phone now it's an issue that we have Findmyiphone on it.. Our ins won't cover it if lost.. His ex isn't going to pay for it?! So his ex says she had her daughter turn it off... It's one thing after another!! Counselor didn't know what to do so she says she will take it to the judge. Ugh I just want all this over with!! I DONT KNOW HOW YOU STEP MOMS DO IT?!?! I love this child as my own.. But the lies about me hurt me.. Now I don't trust his daughter either. : (

Ev - posted on 07/08/2013

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Talk to your husband and tell him what is going on. Tell him to talk to her about leaving you alone. Do not call, text, or email with her anymore. Let him find out the details of the kids and then let him tell you what is going on so you are on the same page as he is. Let him deal with her all the time. This is coming from the ex wife of a man who has married 2x since me.

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