Are the terrible 2s supposed to be this terrible?

Kenya - posted on 06/03/2010 ( 18 moms have responded )




Omg! She listens to noone, has a hissy fit if its not her way, she has to touch everything even after told no or not to touch, she hits and screams. Idk what to do anymore with my lil one??? Really wondering am i the only one thats going thru this and is it natural cause it sure doesnt seem that way???


Sarah - posted on 06/04/2010




let me preface this by saying that i'm an old school mom. while i think that 2-3 year old are sassy by nature, that doesn't mean you have to just take it. this is the time when she is learning boundaries! discipline and consistency will take the edge off that sass until she realizes that it won't be tolerated. i don't believe in distracting or bribing children. i believe in punishment that fits the crime and that the child likes the least combined with simple explanations that they can grasp. One warning, then a punishment every single time. I very rarely deal with bad behavior anymore!

~Jennifer - posted on 06/04/2010




I think they call it the terrible twos because it comes every 2 years.....


It's perfectly normal - just be consistent.

Amy - posted on 06/04/2010




I agree with Julie if you think two is bad three gets worse! Our doctor always told us to pick our battles and that's what we did hitting and biting we had no tolerance for, and if it could cause serious injury or death we stopped, and he wasn't allowed to destroy anyones stuff but his own. Good luck, if it helps my son is now a wonderfully behaved 4 year old, lol!


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Carmen - posted on 02/09/2012




My girl is 2 this month and for the most part she is a good kid but she refuses to do ANYTHING that I ask her to do unless it is on her terms. I also have a 10 month old and he is a pretty placid kid. I've tried asking her very nicely to do things, she refuses and throws a hissy fit, asking her with a bit of bluntness to my voice, same thing.....I can't win with her! Please please tell me that there are other parents out there with the same type of situation.......I'm about ready to tear my hair out!!

Kenya - posted on 06/05/2010




OMG! I think you just discribed Zaire, Patricia! You dont look at lil girls as being bad but now a days it matters not. She hasnt gotten to calling us by our first names which she does know she just goes and does something to something that belongs to you or to someone else?! And who knew that the terrible 2's would be the awful 1's! Having support is the best..Luv ya ladies!!!

[deleted account]

When my girls were little my friends and I came up w/ the theory that it's the 'terrible twos' because it typically lasts 2 years.....

She's normal. Just set the limits and stick to them. Consistancy can be so hard, but it is SO important.... especially in the testing everything stage.

Hang in there! This stage won't last forever. I've found (in my 8.5 years of parenting so far) that every age has its joys and trials.

Isobel - posted on 06/05/2010




I feel your pain! My first daughter was awful - so I thought at the time. My ssecond was so much more so! Number 1 really only had one big tanty - on the footpath outside the daycare centre! But number 2 - I only had to look at her "wrong" and it was on. it felt like she'd been 2 forever, 'cos it started at about 18months. the upside is she was lovely at daycare -they said they'd have 10 of her! Guess she was testing the boundaries, and because I was preg with my son she knew I couldn't get to her quickly! SHe had a look that said she knew she shouldn't be doing it but was going to anyway. My son is now 2 (AAARRRGH!) and having roaring tantys if he can't have what he wants. His speech is delayed so there's prob some frustration there, too (for him and his parents).
No 2 duaghter is slowly growing up (now 4) but there's a way to go! good luck, remember to love her, even if you don't love her behaviour, and enjoy the good bits however few and far between. It's a fascinating time of learning and discovery for them ....

Abbie - posted on 06/05/2010




Have you heard of affirmations? Its what you say will come true. Sounds crazy I know, but I remember once saying my son was going through the terrible 2's and a women that I think highly of, says, look at it as if he was the other way. Just laying there only breathing and not being full of life. I was amazed at the effect and the change in my outlook. I NO longer call it the terrible 2's. And it has made dealing with my son easier. Its what they do they need limitations and boundaries but how we as the parents deal with it makes a huge difference. And by no means am I a patient person but I am finding it more and more, because my son also is a strong willed little guy. I stay stop he runs, I say lets go faster, he drags his feet.

PATRICIA - posted on 06/05/2010




Hey I think my daughter is at your house?? She will be 2 in June and the terrible twos started at one. She is Miss Independent if Ive ever met her and shes got the attitude to match, When shes mad she even calls me Trisha (which is my name) She has gotten a bit better but I have moms who have told me she is like 2 crazy boys wrapped up into a cute little girl. So I feel your pain!

[deleted account]

WOW! Did you borrow my little girl to write this post? You just totally described my situation here. Basically I learned to rotate her time outs with different forms of discipline and I've been ignoring her hissy fits as you call them. Basically I tell her when she's done whining about something silly then mommy will talk to her and I walk off to do something else. If she follows me I pick her up, take her to the bathroom, wet a wash cloth and say It's over and done now. Big girls don't cry over silly things like that so let's wash your face and start all over again shall we. That works 98% of the time to stop them.

Lisa - posted on 06/05/2010




trust me its normal and it is bloody hard im going through the same thing its actually that bad that most of my family has banned me from there houses lol u just need to stay calm i know its easier to say then do i find it pretty difficult the only way i cope is by getting all my anger and tears out on a night time when hes gone to bed, my son can be a complete nightmare he trows tantrums all the time he doesnt do as his told at all even getting him to eat something is really difficult, people keep telling me to take a deep breath and count to 10 but guess what that doesnt work lol

Kelly - posted on 06/05/2010




Yeah im in the same boat. My son is 3yrs and cause he isnt talking asmuch as the others i find he gets frustrated cause he cant communicate with us.... i know it will pass so im trying my best but being 38qweeks preggiers my patience isnt what it normally is.

Kenya - posted on 06/05/2010




Thank you guys for the info and im glad im not alone! I guess that being a new mom and not have siblings can have a huge toll on your mind. I try to stand my ground and will continue to do so!!! Thanks a bunch ladies!!!

Sandra - posted on 06/04/2010




I always named the years. Terrible 2's (because they can't talk alot and get frustrated) Trying 3's ( because they try your patients because they know what they want and they want it their way) Fabulous 4's (because they can speak and are more independant) Forever 5's ( because the 4's continue on) Then there's 12 year olds!! They just lose there brains til they are 21.(parents know nothing, they know it all and they become invinsible.) But that's a whole differnet story. The trick is to be consistant ALWAYS! I always say "What you put into it is what you get out of it" The first 5 years are the most important to mold them. I was consistant, strict, and they got consequences and all mine turned out. Good luck

Jenn - posted on 06/04/2010




I agree with Sarah - they are testing their boundaries and gaining more independence, but that doesn't mean they should be let loose to do as they please. Rules and consistency are very important, and if you say no then mean no, and if you threaten a consequence for their action then follow through with it.

Sandra - posted on 06/03/2010




It's normal. Some kids are worse then others. My son was not that bad but my nephew is 2 and he refuses to do anything. He will tell you NO and cross his arms and give you the stair you give them when your mad. It is horrible but they get threw it. I think it just depends on the child and their own attitude to the intensity. Just be consistent with her and remember she is only 2 for 12 months!

Julie - posted on 06/03/2010




It's natural and sometimes it gets worse at 3. Just stand your ground, do not give in and try to distract as much as possible.

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