Are there any over 40 mothers with advice on surprise pregnancies?

User - posted on 05/02/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




In May of 2009 when I was preparing for my DH's 45th surprise birthday party, I got a little surprise of my own! I was either pregnant or going through menopause, wasn't sure which - what a situation, huh! We have two older children, then 15 and 13, and I was 41. We were pretty content with our little family, though I did have a miscarriage in 2000 in my second trimester which was devastating and I never truly got over. It wasn't that I didn't want more children, but I was always afraid to try because I didn't think I could survive losing another baby. Both hubby and I were shocked to find ourselves expecting again, and terrified. The first six months were so scary because several times I thought I was miscarrying again. Now my amazing little boy is here, in his "trying" twos, and I adore him. His siblings adore him too and often say "What did we ever do without him!" But I just do not have anyone to talk to about the not so "great" things about having a baby at this stage in my life because if I do, people are so quick to point out "oh, but what a blessing you have!" Yes, I do have a blessing - I absolutely would never change having my little boy, I just wish I had him five years ago. I mourn that my two older kids will be out of the house before he remembers having them here - he won't really remember what it's like to have a brother and sister growing up. I mourn that I may embarrass him at his first day of preschool and his high school graduation because I will be the same age as most grandparents of his friends in his class. I also never have felt so old, because people never commented on my age before I had him. Now its "HOW old are you?" And, yes, I have twice had the dreaded "Is this your grandson?" Before I had him I was still under the delusion that I was a younger mother - now I have the clear perception that people have of me when they think it is so odd that I have a baby now! I know all about being positive and appreciating that I have him, which definitely makes any negative worth it and makes things EASIER, but not necessarily always EASY. Anyone else in this situation and can understand what I'm going through?


Sherri - posted on 05/02/2012




I am 40 and just had my 4th son 9wks ago. I also have a 15, 13 & 5yr old so I can totally relate 100% to exactly what you are going through. I am already the oldest mom out of all the other Kindergarten moms this year. I can't even imagine in 5yrs when my newborn starts school.

1 Comment

View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms