Melissa - posted on 09/27/2009
dont know, but i had it as a married woman due to infertility issues and noone complained. not that i went around announcing it. who cares what they think, if you are in a position to care for a child and dont have a partner currently, you go for it
Shonda - posted on 09/26/2009
hi kelly...i think its great...i think everyone ,if at all possible, should have at least one child because a person will never know real true love till u hold that baby in your arms...oh it was amazing all 3 times i gave birth...well the baby , not the pain..lol...i had my tubes ed cause my son had a very rare genetic disorder that took his life when he was 8 yrs old...the tuves were tied before my son died but i regretted it as soon as i was done...cause now i want another baby more then anything...i miss the sound of kids ..no , another child wouldn t take my dead son's place but i think it would help me heal...if that makes sence
Kathy - posted on 09/26/2009
I think single women should have every legal right to get inseminated, but at what point did you ask yourself if it was better for the baby? Frankly, I think the word should be spelled "pair"ent, because that's what's best for baby. If your dream is to be a mom, then how can you give your child anything less than 100% of your time until they are school-age when you have the option of waiting for a husband? You really think it will be better for your child to go through the first 3 or 4 years in daycare, or even at a relative's, than to have you or dad home at all times (other than date nights)? Don't get me wrong, I think IVF and all that is fine for people who have problems conceiving, but just because you want one? No thanks. Start saving your money instead so when Mr. Right happens you can raise your baby yourself, without any financial stress.
Eve - posted on 09/26/2009
I did notice some negativity when I tried at age 23 as a single young woman. I already had a child, which I think made the doctor take me somewhat more seriously. I think 25 is kinda their cut off for when they start treating people more seriously. They do want young women because it improves their success rate, so you've got that going in your favor. I don't know about actual discrimination, but some negativity was expressed. It helps to be calm, upbeat and positive and let it all roll off. Also, shop around different providers have very different attitudes and styles.
Laura - posted on 09/26/2009
Jo Molloy!!! I feel embarassed and ashamed of you, for your blanket statement for no regard to the individual situation.!!! I had terrible endemitriosis that left my tubes so scarred that I can not conceive with my husband on our own. We have a 2 year old from IVF and just had 2 of our embryos implanted yesterday and I am now on bedrest hoping I can bring another miracle into this world. Motherhood is the most beautiful thing I have ever done and I'm good at it. My husband and I are both educated professionals and there is no reason that we should be cheated out of parenthood because of an unfortunate condition or disease. Modern technology, research and discovery gives us the benefit to overcome these obstacles with treatments.
Think about this hypothetical: Your mom is diagnosed with cancer that can be treated so she can live a longer, fuller, more satisfying life. Someone tells you if she’s got it she's meant to have it and should just let it destroy her life and not seek any medical help to correct it - just go ahead and live with her condition; or in this case die with it. Does that sound smart to you? I am guessing you live a sad small life if you go around making statements such as this one in your everyday life. GET SOME HELP SISTER, REALLY! I am above name calling so I will not stoop there for you - you do not deserve it. Wake up, open your eyes and join us here in the 21st century. And for the record you would be eaten alive on the fertility forum of which I am a member. Your parents should be ashamed of you and someone should have taught you better. God bless my 2 embryos,that they make it and grow up into wonderful citizens in this world that never make someone feel as you have made me feel after reading your post. I vow right now to raise them better than that!
P.S. Kellie , please pardon me from distracting from your original post, but this woman’s comment needed addressed.
Helen - posted on 09/26/2009
It is no worse than people who get pregnant through a one night stand but it is always better with a daddy around. you are only young so why not wait a few years. I fel the same way but was glad i waited as i met my husband at 26 and now have a lovely little boy
Tasnim - posted on 09/24/2009
hey kellie..no..v shuld follow our heart nd evry thng ll fall in place..its good..as long as u r prepard to wait for as long as it takes...coz i know a few who r trying 4 past few years nd still not successfl..i m married but i also concvd thru ai...it took 5 mnths 4 me...i ve 5yrs old daughter..all d best to u...
Julie - posted on 09/24/2009
Why not adopt! Im sure there are some Dr.s who discriminate against single womern. Most seem ok with anything people want as long as they get paid. To me you are kind of young to be starting a family.What I meant to say is that at 23 you have alot of years of fertility. Why not wait for awhile to see if you find the perfect partner for you.Its hard raising kids in a 2 parent family much less as a single women or man.
Kathryn - posted on 09/24/2009
Just to throw a loop into this... if you have a donor, you don't actually have to go through a clinical insemination. I was a surrogate twice, and both times it was self-insemination.
Of course, it's probably better to make sure you don't have the crazy before committing to having a kid, but if you're determined, all you REALLY need is a willing donor and a working uterus.
Susan - posted on 09/23/2009
hey there Kelly , never get up on your dreams. If its children you want, then you just do not take no for an answer. Keep looking and prove that you are capable of raising children and see no reason why you should be denied. I truly don't think that the fertility clinics discriminate. I myself was artificial inseminated and was blesses with a son in 2002. Okay I was not 23, I was 39. However, I am a lesbian. And yes you will probably be asked to see a counsellor. I seen the counsellor once. I think it took about twenty minutes. Few question like what if ... and how would... and what about male role models... and that's it, you start shopping for the donor you want to use. I was not as fortunate the second time. . . due to age therefore I started the process of adoption and there too I have no reason to believe that I have been discriminated against. Hopefully soon I will have my second son. Mc Master Hospital in Hamilton is where I went. But there are other places in Hamilton area. The other option is to have you doctor refer you to an OB. There are many OB's now that can provide the same service.
Good luck to you.
Sherry - posted on 09/23/2009
Kellie, when my husband and I went to our local reproductive specialist we saw quite a lot of single women undergoing treatment. We tried artificial insemination several times, but it did not work for us. We did, however have success with in-vitro and were blessed with triplets. Our local specialists were amazing and did require us to undergo two therapy sessions so that we understood everything that 'could' happen. In our area, they do not descriminate because of marital status. I certainly hope this is true for you, as well. If you are like I was, you will be thrilled to conceive; your heart will be full. Good luck to you. Motherhood is amazing.
Martine - posted on 09/23/2009
I'm a single twinmom and I got my sons thanx to artificial insemination with donor sperm. I live in Belgium (Europe) and I only know how things work over here. I know that there are hospitals who refuse to help single women, but in other hospitals they will help you. I had to see a counselor 3 times before I got accepted. Most hospitals over here work with a minimum age, but I know someone who got accepted at the age of 25 while another hospital thinks you're still to young at the age of 32, but once you get started they even quit helping you after a few tries and you're still not pregnant. I went to a great hospital in Brussels and I got pregnant right away with twins. This was in 1993 and my boys will be 16 in November. If you're thinking about becoming a single mom I wish you lots of good luck and I hope you find a hospital that will help you.
Cathy - posted on 09/23/2009
I work in an infertiltiy office in Indianpolis IN, women coming through our office that would like to get pregnant using donor sperm have to go see one of our couselors, not to se if they hare crazy (haha) but just to make sure they are prepared and understand what is involved in using donor sperm and they can handle the process. It does not matter how old you are (as long as you are of legal age). Good Luck!
Cindy - posted on 09/22/2009
That's a great question. I think it really depends on the specialist doing the procedure. Some base their work ethics on moral beliefs and believe women should be married.
Call your local reproductive specialist. Take Octomom as an example and you'll find they didn't discriminate the fact that she was a single woman.
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