at what age should i allow my 15 yo to listen to explicit lyrics?

Lyn - posted on 02/06/2010 ( 9 moms have responded )

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My daughter is at the age where all her friends are listening to "pop music" of today. Some of it is absolutely disgusting, and I feel that it is me against the entire music industry with allowing her to listen to all the references of sex, drugs etc. I'm not a prude, just want to raise a proper young lady and not let these lyrics influence her. She is a great kid, and I don't want to shelter her completely, but what is the limit?

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Katherine - posted on 08/01/2015

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If you keep it from her, she's going to rebel. Take preacher's daughters for example. None of the lyrics are going to "influence" her, I don't think. Depends on how mature she is. My daughter is 13 and likes this band My Chemical Romance. One of My Chemical Romance's songs repeats the words "Mama, we all go to Hell." She loves that song (and every other song by that band), though a song, or a band, isn't going to make her worship Satan.

Tah - posted on 02/06/2010

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when she's 18 and your driving her to college..only because you can't hear what she's listening to in the dorm...my mom used to tell us she didn't give a cat frazzle what our friends were doing we were her chikdren and were gonna do what she said..roger that mom...

Sharon - posted on 02/06/2010

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I have to say, its not that I think my son will talk like that or think like that... not exactly. I worry about this crap getting ingrained via subconciously.

the day my son takes apart a song and explains the lyrics to me and explains why its wrong, why he won't be like that, act like that, talk like that but the beat/music itself is good, is the day I allow him to have 'crap' music despite the lyrics.

He's not there yet.

Lyn - posted on 02/06/2010

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Thank you ladies! Great advice. It seems like I am doing the right thing by monitoring her music, and there are some that she has gotten from friends that are outrageous, and we do talk about that. Her defense is that "just because the song says certain things, doesn't mean she will do it, or should be held responsible for what they are saying in the song"....wow...it makes me stop and think! but she won't repeat what she hears, I just don't want her to think that everyone does that, or that men should expect or treat ladies like that. it makes being a parent these days very difficult.

Krista - posted on 02/06/2010

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Basically it's like any other media -- you wouldn't let your 15 year old daughter rent R-rated movies, right? So it's up to us as parents to know what is out there and decide where we draw the line and to use that line-drawing as a teaching moment. But I think if you DO decide that certain music is not allowed, it's a good idea to talk to your daughter as to WHY you don't approve of that music, instead of just forbidding it without any discussion.

Sharon - posted on 02/06/2010

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If your family is into "sex is on fire" in your livingroom - yeah by all means let her listen to it.

Or if you don't mind "How Low" by ludacris -

She could go lower than i ever really thought she could,
Face down, ass up!
The top of your booty jiggling out your jeans,
Baby pull your pants up,
I like it when i see you do it,
Better then i ever seen it done before,
A lot of women drop it to the ground,
But how low can you go?
Lower then your mama’s ever seen it in her life time,


My 14 yr old isn't allowed to listen to stuff like that. Not even radio edit versions.

I can't control every situation but there is a list of Top 100 songs - not all are dirty. Listening to the radio - I would say less than 15% is explicit - although that 15% is likely to be at the top of the charts at any given time...

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That answer will be different for every family, as every family has different values and or religions. I was not raised in a censored Christian home home. My husband however was. All 5 of them (him and his siblings) were raised in what I termed a bubble. When I got to thinking about it though we are all raised in a bubble. We were all surrounded by different things in our bubbles though. His family turned out excellent. Good looking smart people strong in their faith. Most virgins unto marriage. They also didn't seem to suffer a lot of the trials most teens do. Peer pressure, extreme dislike of body image etc etc. Music does affect mood among other things. A lot of mainstream "artist" are putting out straight trash today. Ex. Brittney Spears song "If you seek Amy" F---YOU---SEE----KAY----ME. I will not bring that filth into my house personally. Personally I don't want my kid listening to anything that would turn her gaze away from Christ. I'm not saying that all that is allowed into my house is Christian music, but I don't want songs that glorify sin in my home. Another set of lyrics in one of her songs is "living in sin is the new thing"...Ultimately its up to you, and what you want around your child, and what you want influencing your child. Personally we don't listen to a lot of mainstream music, simply because their attitude is sex, drugs and killing police sells. Not "values" I want in my home. There are enough negative things in the world that I have had and will have to teach my child about without having her surrounded with with it at every turn.

Rosie - posted on 02/06/2010

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whenever u feel it is right for your daughter. i personally don't censor much of what my kids listen to or watch, i use it as a learning tool to discuss the situations that arise. i listened to music that had vulgar language and i don't believe it influenced me to do anything bad or even to start talking that way. have a talk with her about how she feels about the music. chances are she's like me (you said she's a great kid, i was too-lol!!) and doesn't really take the lyrics to heart, she just likes the beat of the music. i'm usually more moved by slow songs, with heartfelt lyrics than hip hop music, but i still liked listening and dancing to it. hope that helps, good luck!!

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Not sure since my girls are only 8, so I may modify my reaction if the time ever comes.....



I 'think' if I see it or hear it... it is gone. Obviously you can't control what she is listening to when she isn't w/ you, but I would try to have an honest discussion of WHY it bothers you. Good luck!

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