Heather - posted on 09/16/2011 ( 12 moms have responded )
I'm new to COM, so forgive me if this is in the wrong place. I'm looking for advice on how to deal with my daughter's dad and his parents. I found out I was pregnant when I was 18 and ended up with a newborn shortly after I turned 19. Her dad called me a few times when I was pregnant and saw me once or twice, but wasn't ready for another baby. He had two girls when he was in high school. So, we just lost contact and I didn't think about how important it would be to stay in touch for our daughter's sake. Sophie, now 6 years old, wants to know her dad and asks about him every single day. I contacted her dad's parents when I was still pregnant and they were very supportive, but after multiple moves, we lost contact until a year ago. I have been talking to them often since they found me and they have been nothing but supportive. I also got in contact with Sophie's dad about 4 months ago, and we talk often, but he isn't ready to tell his older girls, and now 4 year old son, about our daughter.
Here is my dilemma: Sophie's grandparents desperately want to know her, and rightfully so, but what's best for Sophie? They live in another state, but want to talk to her on the phone and visit sometimes. I don't know how to tell Sophie she has another set of grandparents who love her, but a dad that still doesn't want a relationship with her yet. Any advice on what I should do?