Baby turning 1!

Sydney - posted on 10/16/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )




My daughters 1st birthday is around the corner. And I am so excited to have a somewhat small birthday party for her. Although, I come from a divorced family and my mother is re-married and doesn't feel comfortable around my father's family. I don't want my daughter to have to always have the burden of divorce and not being able to have all of her family together at events, but I don't know what else to do other then to have 2 birthday parties. I am also scared that if I have 2 parties my husband's family may want their own party with her so they don't feel obligated to travel. I find this very hard and frustrating, Any help would be greatly appreciated!


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Barbara - posted on 10/23/2012




The family should all attend the 1st birthday party and be happy to be invited for the great event. If you are worry that the adults can not get along for 1 evening or afternoon then on the invitations you should note they will be asked to leave and never attend your daughter's events in the future. This may seem harsh but your daughter does not need to be around anyone who cannot put her first. This should be a happy day for your daughter and all adults should keep this in mind.

Michelle - posted on 10/17/2012




I agree with the other ladies. They are adults and if they want to see their Granddaughter then they can put aside their differences for a few hours. It's your daughters' day, not theirs.

My family has always got along. My Mum is onto husband #3, I am remarried to #2 and we all get along for the children. Just this last Sunday when I dropped my boys off with their Dad there was myself (ex wife), my current husband, the ex's ex girlfriend, his current girlfriend with all our kids (6 in total). We had a great night and my ex and current girlfriend put on a BBQ for all of us.

I believe that the adults have to behave their age and get along (at least in front of the children) because it's not the children's fault that the parents split.

Amy - posted on 10/17/2012




I would just tell your family that you aren't going to be holding separate parties so for the sake of their grandchild they better find a way to get along or else they are going to miss out on a lot of precious moments because whoever starts the trouble will be the one that gets excluded the next time around. My daughters first birthday consisted of my husbands parents, her brother, and her uncle, we had a separate party for my parents because they live 4 hours away. Typically it's on one day with both sets of grandparents, and brother.

Kristin - posted on 10/16/2012




When I think small party for a one year old, I think of the child's parents, siblings , and grand parents and your and your husbands siblings and maybe a neighbor or two. did u plan on inviting it uncles and aunts? Is that who your mom would feel uncomfortable around?

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My parents are divorced as well. My mom strongly dislikes my dad. I basically told everyone that they had to be at least civil with each other at parties. Or they could just not come and miss out entirely.

Thus far I've had my baby shower, my daughter's 1st and 2nd birthdays, with everyone there. They are civil and polite to each other. In the end it is more important for them to see their grandchildren than to bicker about 12 year old issues.

For my daughter's 3rd birthday there is a split party but it is because we don't have the room to host a large party anymore.

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