Bad Attitude

Sherry - posted on 10/31/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My first husband died 9 years ago. I have grown up my daughter for the last 10 years alone. I just got married 3 months ago. My new husband loves us both. My daughter was fine with him before marriage. They played together, talked, laughed and respected each other. Now my daughter has turned 360 degrees against him, saying that she hates my husband. He had scolded her once before the marriage and once after. Since then she has a terrible attitude towards him, saying that she hates him and will never change that. He has set punishment for her, basically taking away all electronics and fun activities at school, such as Halloween fun day. Of course, she is not too receptive towards this and now has an attitude towards me. I don't have a problem with the punishment. How can I help her to understand that respect is due to everyone, even though you do not like the person? Other advice would be helpful. By the way, she is an A student and has no issues with anyone else in authority. Thanks.

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/01/2012

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Well, I would hate him too if he took Halloween from me. That sucks. Most kids cannot do enough to get a special once a year holiday taken away. Just my opinion, maybe that was TOO far.



Maybe he should not be the one passing out punishment just yet. How about he talks with her if he is the one there....then you and him both discuss the consequence in private...and sit down with her as a family and discuss her punishment together. This way no one is made out to be the bad guy.'

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Also, you alone sit down with your daughter and really discuss things and all of her concerns. Listen to what she has to say, I mean really listen to her.

Dove - posted on 10/31/2012

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I, personally, think that the discipline/punishments should come from you... not him directly. I understand taking away electronics, but not a school fun day... unless it's an after school activity. School punishments should be for in school and home punishments should be for outside of school. IMO, at least.



How old is she? Has she said WHY she hates him? Perhaps a few sessions with a family counselor would be of some help. Does she just hate him when she is in trouble for something specific or has this become an all the time issue now?

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Dove - posted on 11/01/2012

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Seems like a petty thing to tell an 11 year old boy to put his shirt back on while he's outside.... I don't think I'd like him much either if I were that kid. lol

Sherry - posted on 11/01/2012

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Thanks, Dove. My daughter is 10 years old. She says that some of her cousins do not like him either and since they told her this she has adopted the same stance. In fact, it's only because one of them was also disciplined - he is 11 years old and was told to put his shirt back on when he was outside. Seems petty but to the children they just don't seem to like to be disciplined by anyone other than their biological parents??? My daughter has just started this hate trip since she was scolded the first time.

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