badly behaved 7 year old her

Angela - posted on 01/08/2014 ( 16 moms have responded )

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can anyone help . My 7 year old Daughter is boxing her sister . she drops books clothes on the floor and looks at me to pick it up , she has a temper her dad , My x husband.( of 2 and half years ) he was verbally abusive to me and i don't want my Daughter to be the same as her dad .but every day i can she she acts more like him , she was at counselling and told the counselor that her dad told her he was going to kill me , after a long chat she know i was going to be ok , can any one tell me how i stop her becoming her dad ,

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Courtney - posted on 01/10/2014

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Yes...yes i do and trust me with our move and all the crazy bs thats going on with my husband and dealing with my son thats ALL i wanna do..lol...and bc we moved to a place where i know no-one around here i to turn to circle of moms just to have a "friend" to speak with ab these very problems i mentioned so i understand...and if i offended u i did not mean to.I just know what your going through from what u posted and im trying to get advice as well from another mom thats dealing w this...This may sound a bit silly but idc what anyone thibks and it doesnt hurt to throw it out there but if u EVER need another mom to speak with ab anything message me! Iv had quite a few ppl "attack" me on here and i sometimes wonder why the hell are we..as mothers..speaking to each other that way..we are ALL here for a reason and that reason isnt being attacked for asking a ? we need advice on...ughhh...lol..ok that was me venting...lol..anyway like i said feel free to message me anytime...if not i still wish u and ur family the best of luck!

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Thatbinnichick - posted on 01/12/2014

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You should diciplin her if your not a physical mom you should take somthing away from her when shes mis behaving make sure you let her know right from wrong if shes crying and screaming act like you dont care it may go on for a while but it will slowly work make sure she apologises for hurting any one ane if she boxes her sister and her sisters older let her sister take stuff away from ger as wll if her sisters younger tell her she will get somthing for that daughter and not the bad one

Angela - posted on 01/10/2014

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do u ever get a day your head is melting and all u want to do is talk to someone ? well that was me on wed

Courtney - posted on 01/10/2014

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Well-thats great he had a chat with her...but when u say everythings ok now it makes me wonder what in the world he said! Please tell me his secret bc i know i said that looking at old happy pics with my son was great bt its far from being at the point id call "ok"...i mean no offense but things like that doesnt just change that quick.Maybe u just found the beginning of helping her bc im sorry i find it a bit hard to believe everythings A OK...

Jonn - posted on 01/09/2014

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First you can't tell her she doesn't have to go if she doesn't what to. Wrong! If you want to end up loosing her to this lunatic keep that up.

Counseling? It also could be that she has inherited her fathers personality disorder. If that's the case; again, counseling? Prove to the courts that the father is abusive is the second step. I hear you all in here thinking its as easy as telling them they don't have to go, or just take visitation away from the day; you have control they don't. People stop thinking like this, it will only get you in trouble.

Michelle - posted on 01/09/2014

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My oldest went through a similar phase. When he wasn't phased losing him things I made him sit and write out lines like "I must not hit my sibling because it hurts" or "I have to listen and respect my Mother at all times while in her house"
He hated that more than losing his things and the behaviour stopped.

Angela - posted on 01/09/2014

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Courtney Stevens
Thank you , i am not the only one . i have done up behaviour charts , and my dad has a chat with her , so thinks should change

Courtney - posted on 01/09/2014

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Hi! Im having a similar situation myself with my 7yr old son...he throws himself on the floor at home and even in public! If i go to grab his hand(even very sweet)he throws himself down and screams i hurt him!!! Iv done ab everything i can think of INCLUDING "giving him more n more n more love" but that actually aggervates him...he gets madder the nicer i am...iv necer spanked him...idc what othera do to their kids in that area but me as a mother i dont spank bt iv taken his fav toys games even time out and nothing works..hell-i even posted on here for help not to long ago and no1 responded....So this has been going on for a very long time and theres nothing in the home that he sees or hears anyway that is doing this and his teachers say he is fine there...BUT the other night i found my old camera and plugged it to charger and foynd some pics of him ab 4-5yrs old...he wanted to see so we sat back on the couch and looked at over 600 pics and he lol and seemed to really enjoy it..meanwhile i looked at him and said "Baby look how happy u are in these pics!...do u remember that?i hope to see u this happy again soon bc mommy is worried" he smiled and said "ok mommy...im going to be better" i told him he wasnt a bad child bt his attitude was nasty and makes me cry bc he wont ever tt me ab whats goin on...Anyway im telling u this bc i to know how u feel and wanted to share my story and maybe u can rekindle ur relationship with her by something like we did that is so little...i believe you and ur girl will be fine and i will have u in my thoughts...Wishing u the very best of luck-Courtney

Angela - posted on 01/09/2014

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i take her netbook off her . her teddy or i send her to her room , and all she says ok i don't want it any way , or she will go to her room ,

Michelle - posted on 01/09/2014

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What consequences does she have when she has these outbursts?
What punishment as the parent do you give her?
All you've told us is what she does and that she's like her Dad, you haven't told us how you deal with it.

Angela - posted on 01/09/2014

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her Dad never see what he does wrong like screaming at her and telling her he is going to kill me , i have told her he is not going to kill me , i have talked to him about him screaming at her , but he said he does not , i have told her she does not have to go and see him if she does not want to , but she said she hopes he will change and not scream at her , she is great with other kids , ,
Thank you foe your help

Ed - posted on 01/08/2014

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so then, the worm in the can is her visits to her Dad? Will a nice chat with her Dad do any good? Perhaps you have already tried this. How does she interact with other kids?

The fact that you spend lots of time with her is great and I commend you for it. Those are moments she'll never forget.

Angela - posted on 01/08/2014

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hi , we spend a lot of time together she is like my shadow :) and i tell her i love her all the time , when we are not running to Karate classes me colour go to the park or to the cinema, when she goes to her dad she ends up coming home to me

Ed - posted on 01/08/2014

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Don't get nor show her frustration. The more love you show her the more she'll see you and the less she'll see of her Dad in herself. Repeat the words "I Love You" to her!

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