Being a Grandparent and Having A Boyfriend that wants all of your time

Patty - posted on 06/24/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )




Hi - I have been dating someone for over a year and he's a great guy. He knew that I had grown children and 3 grand kids.The only thing he didn't realize is that I love to spend time with my grand kids.

So what has happened is that I have had time out from spending with my grand kids as he says I spend to much time with them. So it started with around 3 times a week down to 1 day a week and some week-ends if I'm lucky. I have a very close relationship with them so its very hard not seeing them.

I've talked to my boyfriend about it and told him he needs to understand that he can't have ALL of my time. I feel like he's taking me away from the thing that brings me so much joy - my grand kids.

Any advise on how to deal with this? I've told him that he and I can work around this so that there is plenty of time with HIM and w/the grand kids but every time I schedule something with the grand kids I get a sour face (boyfriend) - I told him he doesn't have to be around them that I can spend the time I want to with them and he can come with me whenever he 'wants' to.

By the way, I am a pretty young grandma - I'm 44 years old. :)

If it was the old me - I would have dumped him a long time ago but as you age - you become more patient and are more willing to work out deals with your spouse so it's a win/win situation.


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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/24/2014




I'm sorry, but any man who cannot realize that you have a family and they are important to you is not worth your time.

You've tried to compromise, and from the sounds of it he's still a spoilt child about the whole thing. Personally? I'd kick him to the curb and look for a better match. One that values family as much as you do.

Once you start letting him dictate your moves, it will only get worse. Giving in to him on this will only lead to him being more controlling about your time in another way. You've offered a compromise, and he responds like a 3 year that really a 'man' that you want to spend time with? Even if the sex is awesomely over the moon, its not worth your family.

Amy - posted on 06/24/2014




I don't think at any age you should allow someone to dictate the amount of time they find acceptable doing the things you want to do. If he can't accept that he's not the only one in your life then you should probably move on.

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