Being a Stepmother

Ashley - posted on 01/22/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I have been a stepmother to my husband's son since he was 10 months old. His mother has been in an out of the picture since he was 8 months old. She has gone months to a year at a time without having anything to do with him, he doesn't know her at all. He has called me mom since he was two he is now 5. Recently his real mother has been coming around once or twice a month, she has gotten upset at the fact that he calls her by her name and calls me mom. I do understand that I'm not biologically his mother but it is hard when she is around. When and how do I explained to him that I am not really his mom? How do I tell him that someone he knows as a stranger is really his mom?

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Melanie - posted on 01/22/2014

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I am also a step-mother to two children. The youngest is a 5 year old boy. I married their father when my step-son when he was 21 months old. Their mother has always been in the picture but we have the kids half the time and on her days she works I watch the kids instead of them going to day care. They have always called me mom because they chose to which bothers their mother, but that is off the subject. I don't know about when to tell your step son but I think that when you do tell him it won't matter you are not his real mother as long as he knows you love him and will always love him. I heard someone say the other day that the title of mom doesn't mean a thing, it is the actions. If you know anyone who is a psychologist maybe pick their brain on the subject of how to tell him or when is an appropriate time.

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