Being only a stepmother to disrespectful kids

Neveramomalwaysastepmom - posted on 07/29/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I don't have any biological children of my own I'm 39 years old and been married to a man for 2 years that have two children of his own by his ex-wife... the wife told the children to be ignorant and disrespectful to me to break us up.. the children told me that that is their goal when they are around me to cause conflict between me and my husband to break us up because their mother said they do not want to see their father happy. So I told them they are no longer allowed in our home until they could be respectful and apologize am I wrong for taking it out on the children even though they are 14 and 20 years old by not allowing them in our house until they could be respectful and apologize.. please help me out

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 07/29/2016

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I think that is an awful thing for all of them to do. Not really acceptable to not allow his kids in the home in my eyes though. What has your husband said or done about this?

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Neveramomalwaysastepmom - posted on 07/31/2016

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That's what his ex wife & kids want for us to be apart to break us up and exclude me. .so we should let his ex wife and kids get what they want. . Isn't that rewarding bad behavior. . Shouldn't my husband stick by my side and let them know it's not acceptable..

~♥Little Miss - posted on 07/30/2016

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YOU should stay away. He needs to see his children. Sorry, but right now, that is how it might need to be until he addresses these issues.

Neveramomalwaysastepmom - posted on 07/29/2016

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We don't know what is the right thing to do.Before we got married the youngest child was always with me. I signed her up for basketball took her to ever practice went to ever game. She stayed with us and I took her to school and picked her up from school.. I would take her places to volunteer, we painted her bedroom crazy colors like a 11 yr would love, sparkly purple and green paint and a wall of calk board paint.. We did everything together. UNTIL, one day we took her skiing we picked her up from her mothers house and she came to the truck in PJs..no clothes on under them just PJs and a jackets..She said her mother said this is what she is wearing and it will be fine. She didn't want to change out of them and her mother said she didn't have to. She said she didn't have to listen to me I'm not her mother . I told her no I'm not your mother but the public looks at me and judges because I am the adult that is with you not your mother... After the long day of skiing in PJs she went home to her mothers. The next day we went to his mothers house and the youngest one told his mother(her grandmother) that I told I wish she and her sister were never born..She lied.. I never said anything like that.. Never even came close to something like that.. Never would have thought of that ...Well my mother in law took her( youngest) side. My husband her dad was with us the whole time. The oldest was there and she told me to shut up and that she hates me. I couldn't even say anything.. All the oldest kept saying is shut up and she hates me. The youngest one said she was told to make up lies and to break me and her father up. She was told to make up lies to cause a fight.. She said she know if she makes up a lie it will get me in trouble and it will break up me and her father.. She said her mother told her to keep lying about things and say things I did to her so I will get arrested. My husband had several conversations with her and she said she can do what ever she wants to me.. she doesn't care... Her mother doesn't to c you happy..I have a federal job.I can not be accused of false things.I feel terrible for my husband. He is afraid that she will do something to get me thrown in jail or get arrested...Should we stay away ..They are seeing a therpist

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