being polite

[deleted account] ( 7 moms have responded )

my 15 yr old son has problems sometimes when my bf is present about being polite with both of us, How can I correct this?

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Raye - posted on 04/09/2015

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Yes, well, assurances from the BF are all well and good. But your son needs it to be proven that the BF won't leave, and that will take time. Some people have a hard time trusting after they've been hurt so badly. Make sure your son knows that he needs to be respectful, and show him some understanding about the issues he's going through. Try to keep communication open so you can help him through these transitions.

[deleted account]

I have been dating this guy since June-July 2014. I pursued him but we have been good friends since 1996. We attend the same church.

[deleted account]

I have been assured by my boyfriend that he won't leave. I know my BF will not treat me the way my former husband did. I want to be with him and my BF does try to include my son in conversations at the dinner table and other times too asking him about his day at school and so on. I want my son to have a relationship with his father. Since his father has been away since december last year my son has been given the runaround on when he is returning. My BF does not have children so it makes it difficult for him to talk with my son sometimes. I love both of them equally.

Raye - posted on 04/08/2015

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Maybe your son doesn't want to get close to someone new because he's afraid that person would leave too? Don't know. Just guessing.

[deleted account]

His father is of muslim faith and left the country to marry a muslim woman and has yet to return to the US. His father has not made it very clear when he is returning and he should be a part of his son's life and is not at this time.

Raye - posted on 04/08/2015

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Well, the obvious answer is teach him manners. But, let me stop being an ass for a moment. Your post makes it sound like the issue is just when your BF is present? How long have you been dating this guy? Would your son be jealous of the time you're spending your BF instead of spending it with him? Are there other lifestyle choices you've made that your son may not agree with? You should sit down and talk to him about it. Let him know he is expected to be respectful, and what the consequences would be if he isn't. Then follow through with the promised consequences if necessary.

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