Nicole - posted on 09/14/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )
I am a stepmom. Long story short, biomom is in the picture but does not assume any of the responsibilities of a parent. My husband and I do. My step son has visitation with his mom every other weekend and it has been that way for 5 years. The relationship between the BM, myself, and my husband is VERY strained. The BM has always had a problem with me, she has attacked me on numerous occasions, verbally and physically, and it is no secret that we all do not get along. My SS is now 7 and plays soccer. the BM is not able to drive and depends very heavily on her father and my husband to get from point A to point B. This Saturday my SS has a soccer game at 9am, with team pictures before at a different park. My husband reached out to the BM to ask if we may pick up my SS at 7:30am for pictures and his game. The BM said that she will only allow it if she comes with us. Idk how I feel about this. Clearly I will be there, as I always have been (and always will be - whereas she rarely makes these events at all). My husband suggested that she meet us at his game later that morning to keep tensions at bay, but she will not have it. Idk if I am being selfish or if I have every right to feel this irritated by the situation. Even my SS says how his mom hates me and he gets stressed out by the situation, too. Everyone does, not just me. How should I handle this? I really don't feel like I should have to stay home for the sake of her immaturity. But at the same time I know it will be nothing but problems if she comes with us, and I don't want that kind of drama around, especially for my SS just before his soccer game. And when I say drama, I mean I could sit there and not say a word and she will have some kind of remark about my hair, my weight, my car, the way I talk... pretty much anything. Its inevitable that she will start something with me. What do you ladies recommend I do? Should I grin and bear it, or stay home? Or something else? I'm really upset about this. I want to do what's right for my stepson but I know this will cause more harm than good.