blending two families!

Tessy_9 - posted on 07/23/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Hi, im looking for some helpful advice?
my 6 year old son and i recently moved in with my partner. My son and partner get along great and have a strong bond. My son has settled into his new school really well and has made lots of friends, he seems very happy. He has no contact with his real father unfortunately and has recently started calling my partner daddy (which my partner and son discussed first and agreed on) however, my partner has a 9 year old daughter who visits every Wednesday and stays over every other weekend. She is a lovely girl but has been through a lot! She is becoming increasingly jealous of my son and has started bullying him. Im not sure how to help her? I have a good relationship with her and she has a very strong bond with her father. I don't want to be too hard on her as it has all been hard for her but i have to protect my son! (the bullying is verbal) she won't allow my son to play and constantly tells him to be quiet! I suggested her father spend some quality time just the two of them. Is this the right thing to do? I can't sleep the night before she's due to stay for worrying about my son.
please help!

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Jodi - posted on 07/24/2013

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I have a blended family, and all the kids need one-on-one time with their biological parents. It is a challenging transition for the children. They didn't get to choose the situation, so it is our job to help them transition in any way we can. She is probably really missing that one-on-one time she used to get with her dad, and now has to share him with your son, so I'd say this is why she is acting out :) It is certainly worth giving a try.

Jodi - posted on 07/23/2013

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Yes, I would say that dad needs to spend some one-on-one time with his daughter without your son around.

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Tessy_9 - posted on 07/24/2013

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Well thankyou again! I know my situation is not unique but i don't know anyone personally that has been through this to ask, so it means alot that you have replied. Thanks

Tessy_9 - posted on 07/24/2013

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Thankyou! Its good to hear that someone agrees. She really is a lovely girl ordinarily so this must be very hard for her to be behaving like this! Thanks again

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