Amanda - posted on 07/08/2013 ( no moms have responded yet )
First of all I say " bonus" instead of "step" but whatever the word it is a fact that I have been a full time mom to him and his sister. I treat all four of my kids like they are biologically mine even though only two are. My bonus girl is going to be adopted soon and I am so excited. My bonus son is at the Sweetzer program because he has tried to kill my seven year old twice, tried killing our animals, and has purposely made our family sick. I took responsibility for him three years ago when he and his sister came to live with us full time. I quit the job I loved because I knew there was sonething terribly wrong..there is so so much that has happened and I even have been strongly considering divorce because my husband and this kiddos biomom have not helped and have been a HUGE contributing factor. He has been diagnosed with conduct disorder, ptsd, and antisocial personality disorder. To those of you who do not know what these diagnosis are I encourage you to look it up. His bio-mom thinks he has abandonment issues. His dad thinks he is just like he was as a kid. Either case I was told in a meeting with Sweetzer, Wings, his bio-mom and dad, guardian-ad- litem, that the kids both want to be with me and should because they feel the safest with me. I can no longer take care of him and I feel sad and angry about it. His dad is dismissive and his mother has been accused of sexually abusing him. My brother came up from Mass to build a closed kitchen because ours was so open so my bonus son could know his boundaries about not entering the kitchen. He cannot enter the kitchen and needs to be watched 24/7 because he pits his fingers in his rectum and paws through food and everything else. He told the counselor he feels good when he does this and refuses to stop. He sticks socks on the wall that he has put semen and feces on and the list goes on. I am lost and have been living in hell for three years. My bonus girl has been told that her brother is a walking trauma trigger and my bio- girl who is only 21 days older hates what has happened and really resents my husband. My youngest son is scared when his brother is around and on and on that goes...He has been to counseling, therapy, psycho-therapy, seen a psychologist, crisis at acadia, new day, soujourn, and been down to portland at sperwink...i have got him theHelp....not his mother or father. I have no parents to help me..noone really because noone wants to be around him ..Ive been told to get a divorce, take my two bio-kids and move on before this kills me. Oh yeah I have a major heart condition with a risk of sudden cardiac death so I have a defibrillor/ pacer implant. please help!