Boyfriend's Baby Mom Pregnant with New Baby

Daina - posted on 08/03/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )




My boyfriend and I have been together 1.5 years and he has two girls (1 and 2) with his ex. He found out today that she is pregnant again with her new boyfriend's baby.

He doesn't care and is not mad or upset, but is actually sad and disappointed for his two girls and how this is going to affect them. He is worried about how they will do when we have them on weekends and the new sibling is not with us, etc.

Anyone in a similar situation? How did you handle it? Any advice and thoughts?


Michelle - posted on 08/04/2016




I agree with Jodi. My Daughter is from my 2nd marriage and all the kids are very well adapted. I do 50/50 shared care with my 2 boys and have done for 11 years.
Yes my daughter misses the boys when they aren't here but it just means that when they are back she showers them with so much love. Quite funny to see a 15yo boy get lots of hugs from a 6yo girl and accept them as well.
I had people trying to tell me that she would be confused having her brothers her and there but when it's all they have even known then why is it confusing.
Your boyfriend's children are still so young, they won't remember a time without the little sibling.

Jodi - posted on 08/03/2016




Exactly what did he expect would end up happening? He can't break up with someone and expect them not to move on in their own life and never to have more children. He is being really unreasonable and his fears are really unfounded. Do you and he have a child together yet? If not, would you expect to never have children because he would be sad or disappointed for his girls? Or are you guys also planning to have a family together?

Kids are resilient. The new baby will be fine when the sisters go to visit dad, and the girls will be fine too. My daughter has been raised with a brother who lives here and visits dad occasionally on weekends and holidays, a brother who lives with his mother and visits us on weekends and holidays, and a sister who also lives with her mother and visits us on weekends. They all just take the arrangements in their stride and while yes, obviously it affects who they are, it has not impacted negatively on them - they are all well adjusted kids (most of whom are adults or heading into adulthood now, with my daughter being 11). I think your boyfriend is overthinking the situation.


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Dove - posted on 08/04/2016




So funny Michelle. We have a similar scenario between my 8 year old son and his 14.5 year old sisters. They all live here w/ me, of course, but the teens are so busy and gone a lot that their brother is like a cling on when they are around. ♥

As for the OP... I agree w/ Michelle and Jodi. The kids will be fine. They are all so young that they won't remember a time when it wasn't like this.

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