Breaking up with my daughters father, MY DAUGHTERS TAKING IT BAD!!! HELP PLEASE!!?!?!

Patricia - posted on 12/10/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hello everyone,



Here i go, my ex and I broke up in aug. bc he was not a nice person to me at all. Very controlling of what i was allowed to do and who to talk to and i didnt want my daughter to think thats how every man is suppose to treat you. The only reason why i stayed with him was because i didnt want her to have a broken family. Well that thought ended bc now it been months since we have been together and i havent been more happy except my daughter is very different. Which i understand from seeing mommy and daddy toegther everyday in the same house to only seeing her father on weekends. Its ruff for her, (she is 3 by the way). She is very moody, doesnt listen to me anymore, if i dont give into something for her she throws herself on the floor crying for her father. I get down to her level and sit with her and tell her that its okay daddy is working and you will see him soon. But on the other side my ex (her father ) is making it very hard on her. He tells her that he doesnt love mommy and no one does and also that im always an angry person. Which to be honest i could ask anyone, im a very friendly person i never judge anyone. I just dont know i how i could help my daughter with this. anytime she crys for him or says mommy i love daddy, i tell her i know baby your suppose to love daddy and he loves you! i never ever speak negative about him to her or around her, bc i dont want her to ever think negative about her father. I want my daughter to have her own opions about him and if she loves him more then earth so be it, she should. But how do i control the temper with her and the additude im getting!!! Please help someone!!!!

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Patricia - posted on 12/13/2012

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Thank you, i will def. try to reassure her, she can be the sweetest little thing sometimes,but other times she can be so deavous. But i guess i just have to give it time!

Tor Akil - posted on 12/10/2012

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Try the universal language of fun. You don't have to worry about what he says or does, if you make it very plain that you love her with your actions. You don't have to buy her anything (sheesh that is what we all do wrong). Take her to a park, an aquarium, a zoo, the toy section of walmart, or toys r' us and have a ball. Watch a kids movie with her and do girl stuff like paint nails. Start watching the movie and invite her into the room as if you just happend to be doing it on your own. I might add that a funny kids movie might be most effective. Or her favorite one. Puppet shows and arts and crafts. The beauty of parenting is that kids have short attention spans for certain key things. Even a child can tell honesty from the opposite. Also, talk to her after those times. Give lots of hugs when her guard is down, and kisses. As much contact as possible so she will be reassured.

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