BREASTFEEDING IN PUBLIC IN 2009

Jenn - posted on 01/27/2009 ( 122 moms have responded )

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Can you seriously believe we are even talking about this being an issue in this day and age? It made news today that people are offended by photos of nursing moms breastfeeding their babies on facebook. I personally would not be comfortable posting a pic of me breastfeeding but I can't imagine feeling offended viewing a photo of a nursing child and its mother. The question on CNN was posed to the public was concerning nursing in public at all. C'mon, grow up. It's not a sexual thing or a vile thing. I chose to cover up when I nursed in public and I know that even bothered people. I would hope people could think about what's going on there, a child is being fed, that's all.

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Johnny - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Lauren:

Wouldn't a mother of a boy be humiliated if he whips his junk out in public and starts peeing?


Equating urination with breastfeeding is simply moronic.  Virtually everyone in every society voids in private.  I can not think of a place in which any people practice public urination as a socially accepted activity (aside perhaps from drunken college boys). 



 



However, everyone considers eating a social activity that is acceptable in public at almost all times.  Whether this is adults or babies, the intake of nourishment is considered a publicly acceptable activity.  People (regardless of age) need to eat, and they very often do so in public.  Virtually everywhere on the planet, with the exception of some regions of North America, Britain, & Australia, breastfeeding is considered eating, and therefore, completely publicly accepted. And that is what it is, a baby eating.



 



Bottlefeeding or breast, it does not matter. When it is time for a baby to eat, either on demand or if one chooses, on a schedule, then you FEED.  There is no need to hide it from the world by staying at home or under a blanket, unless that is what works best for the mother and child.   Would you eat your steak only at home because it might offend a vegetarian?

Anne - posted on 01/28/2009

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Some one on here was saying they didnt want to have to explain to thier 5 year old what some one was doing if they saw a mother nursing.        



Well I have a 4 year old and since Im nursing my baby she sees what Im doing and even 'nurses' her dolls :-)      So she doesnt ask me about it if she sees another baby in public being nursed she just tells me that the baby is being fed.        My worry is that the day is approaching when my daughter is going to see these teens and adults that think they have to make out in public.       I find it very offensive to go to the park, or to the beach, or just walking down town I see people getting very passinate with each other.      So, Im going to have to answer a question some day soon about what they are doing.       Personally I think they are exposing poeple to more then the public needs to see just by thier actions.       Also what about the men that feel the urge to urinate in a public place.      Arent they revealing more then the public needs to see?      ARe we allowed to protest about that display in public?      arent they putting out a more privet part of them then we are with nursing?       I guess the argument could be that they just had to go, but then so could it go that the baby just had to eat!



I think the world is made up of lots of people with that comes lots of different thoughts.       So I guess if Im suppose to 'look away' from :



mulitiple body piercings,   tattos,    low cut or revealing clothing,     a guy peeing in public,    young lovers who cant wait till they get home,      



People talk about freedom of speach, freedom to do what they want where they want.......then they too can 'look away' from what we have choosen to do in public.        Feeding our children is by far more important then any of the above stated things.

Anne - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Jenny:





Quoting Christi:

Well, I think Jessica is the only one on here with any class. Babies do get on schedules or they should. So schedule feedings when ever possible. Also, if you see women "hanging" out of clothing or swim suits or walking topless on a beach, they get stares as well. Not acceptable if you have any class at all. Breastfeeding is natural but there is a time and place. Also, there is an appropriate time for weening. Personally, breastfeeding after 6 months is ridiculous. Babies should start eating solids by then. I do take offense when I see a 6 year old breastfeeding IN PUBLIC. My son is 8 months now and I cannot imagine breastfeeding him at this point. He has already become his own little person and wants nothing to do with feeding off of me. He loves sitting down with the family as a normal human being and eating with the rest of us in his own chair. 



So you are saying that before they eat on thier own they arnt human like the rest of us?   Maybe if we could all feel free to nurse our babies while at the table then they would feel more like a part of the family too. 



I know lots of animals that dont eat solids until a year of age,   Why should I make my human baby stop nursing well before that time?








I just want to comment on the "breast feeding past 6 months is rediculous".  I assume most of you commenting are from the USA but here in Canada the Canadian Pediactric Scociety recomends not starting any solids until 6 months so unless your child is going to exclusivly eat rice cereal I think you need to keep nursing.  Also, babies aren't supposed to have cows milk until a year old so why would I stop nursing at 6 months. I am not going to force my child to start using formula when I have perfectly good breast milk already here, free for the taking.   Personally I felt that a year was good for me and my son and will probalby stop nursing my daughter around a year as well.  I  wouldn't feel comfortable nursing a 2 or 3 year old but that is the right of the parent if they choose.  And really, how often does one see a 6 year old nursing in public??




I think here in the usa people are trying to push thier kids to be independent well before they are really ready.



I wish we had Dr's like your  Canadian ones.    Myabe if the Dr's would stop perscribing things to please thier patients things would be a lot healthier and babies would be happier



 






Maybe if we didnt have to hide in fear, or with shame for what we are doing, but being thoughtful and discreet like that majority of us are, then there wouldnt be an issue with breast feeding in public.        I agree I do find it a bit distasteful when a full breast is exposed just to nurse,     But if you cant see anything and from all points of view it looks like the baby is just sleeping in your arms, honestly, why should people even know or care what we are doing?     



I dont think nursing is public is any more offensive then seeing a baby having its diaper changed in a public place.       If nudity is REALLY the issue here I can name a lot more un needed skin exposure then feeding a baby.



Everyone is talking about being organic.......yet they debate about nursing in public??    



Maybe if the bottle companies made all of there bottles to look like a breast for the sake of being organic then mothers who make the choice for them selves to bottle feed would have to hide it under a blanket because it would be offensive to the rest of the public.



I think the point about this whole thread was not really wether or not to nurse, but wether its ok for use to nurse, if we so choose, in public.

Janice - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Jessica:

I am not opposed to the idea of breastfeeding, and I don't expect people that breastfeed to hide. It just seems like people that breastffeed exclusively should be a little more considerate to others. I go through a lot of work so that I don't have to whip out my breast wherever I am, it seems like the attitude that "it's natural" and they shouldn't have to do any work or worry about the people around them.

I didn't think about people not being able to express milk into a bottle. If I couldn't do that, honestly, I would not breastfeed. Koodos to you for sticking with it, but just because you seem to feel you have no other choice (there is always formula) doesn't mean that you have the right to whip out your breast wherever you are without consideration to the other people around you.



I am able to pump, but that pumped milk is saved for use when i'm not around, liek when i'm at work, I'm not goign to waste it if my breasts are avaialble. I dont see any issue with breastfeeding inpublic, this is the only country where anyone wopuld even be having this discussion, but its ok for women to be walking around practically scantially clad and no one say anything.  I do  not usually use a blanke tto cover my child because i wouldnt want to eat under a blanket so why should she! i am discreet to the point where i have been in a restaraunt and waitresses have come up to me to see my baby and they thought she was sleeping then got close and have said, "o'h im sorry i didnt realize u were nursing her, you're good!" haha  As far as using formula...i would NEVER use formula unless i absolutely had to! another reason why i will not use a bottle when i'm with her is because the less she actually nurses the more it can hurt your production and i dont want my production to suffer and more thanit does from working.  I have never had any comments or diry looks when nursing in public..i do try to plan my day accordingly so where always home at feeding time but sometimes you're out all day...the only people i've had an issue with nursing around is actually then men in my own family...they can't handle it.. 50 years olds witht he mentality of a child...my younger male cousins (teenagers) are actually fine with it..those are the ones i'd expect a reaction from!

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Quoting Christi:

Well, I think Jessica is the only one on here with any class. Babies do get on schedules or they should. So schedule feedings when ever possible. Also, if you see women "hanging" out of clothing or swim suits or walking topless on a beach, they get stares as well. Not acceptable if you have any class at all. Breastfeeding is natural but there is a time and place. Also, there is an appropriate time for weening. Personally, breastfeeding after 6 months is ridiculous. Babies should start eating solids by then. I do take offense when I see a 6 year old breastfeeding IN PUBLIC. My son is 8 months now and I cannot imagine breastfeeding him at this point. He has already become his own little person and wants nothing to do with feeding off of me. He loves sitting down with the family as a normal human being and eating with the rest of us in his own chair.


I just want to comment on the "breast feeding past 6 months is rediculous".  I assume most of you commenting are from the USA but here in Canada the Canadian Pediactric Scociety recomends not starting any solids until 6 months so unless your child is going to exclusivly eat rice cereal I think you need to keep nursing.  Also, babies aren't supposed to have cows milk until a year old so why would I stop nursing at 6 months. I am not going to force my child to start using formula when I have perfectly good breast milk already here, free for the taking.   Personally I felt that a year was good for me and my son and will probalby stop nursing my daughter around a year as well.  I  wouldn't feel comfortable nursing a 2 or 3 year old but that is the right of the parent if they choose.  And really, how often does one see a 6 year old nursing in public??



I really am confussed as to why people are so offended by seeing someone breastfeed.  I understand there are some women who may show more than you might want to see in public but the large majority of us nursing mothers do make an effort to conceil our breast and honestly I think most of the time that I have nursed somewhere public, even without a blanket or cover, no body know whay I was doing.  No one looked at me or made comments.  Why should we all be punished and forced to feed alone somewhere away from friends and family because maybe someone might possible be offended.  I really don't understand why everyone is soooo against breast feeding.



 

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122 Comments

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Stacy - posted on 07/14/2011

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Alot of people don't have an issue with breast feeding babbies, it is the age of the child that some have a probm with. My personal opinion is we don't like to see a "child" over the age of 2 with a bottle or sucky, why is a breast different?

Sandy - posted on 01/29/2009

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I use my "hooter hider" (kind of like a breast feeding apron) in public - not just to hide myself so as to not affend, but as the baby got older they wanted to look around at what's going on. Baby fed beter with the hooter hider, and didn't leave me just hanging out there!

Shannon - posted on 01/29/2009

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In the US we have to worry about being sued over every little thing, especially a company like Facebook. I assume this is why they removed photos - so that some over-reactive mother doesn't sue them when they catch their curious teenage boy looking at women's nipples. Of course they won't come out and say "we're scared of being sued", they just say "our policy is 'no nipples'".

That being said in defense of Facebook - I have no problem with public breastfeeding and understand it is not always easy to be discreet. It is not even necessary. I could not breastfeed and have so much respect for everyone who can and chooses to.

Katrina - posted on 01/29/2009

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Im 20 years old i was scared to breastfeed my baby cause people kept givin me dirty looks i used to cry and think i was a bad mum cause i was breastfeeding why should i feel this way you lot eat in public why cant my daughter

Becky - posted on 01/29/2009

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Quoting Brenda:



Ah yes, after looking through here and seeing the "babies need a schedule".  Um, no.  Nature does not have a time clock, and neither will my child.  Let me point you ladies to a link that says otherwise:  aapnews.aappublications.org/cgi/content/...






Scheduling babies is not something intended by nature, in my honest opinion. 






If we're taking offense from breasts in public and pictures of it, lets ban pictures of baby bottles while we're at it!  They have a nipple on them, and that's a sexual symbol!  (I hope I didn't say that already but you know, if I did it deserves repeating).





LOL.....I've all ready said what I had to say about this subject, but I thought the line about banning bottles was hilarious!

Brenda - posted on 01/28/2009

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Ah yes, after looking through here and seeing the "babies need a schedule".  Um, no.  Nature does not have a time clock, and neither will my child.  Let me point you ladies to a link that says otherwise:  http://aapnews.aappublications.org/cgi/c...



Scheduling babies is not something intended by nature, in my honest opinion. 



If we're taking offense from breasts in public and pictures of it, lets ban pictures of baby bottles while we're at it!  They have a nipple on them, and that's a sexual symbol!  (I hope I didn't say that already but you know, if I did it deserves repeating).

Tiffany - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Tiffany:



Quoting Christi:

Well, I think Jessica is the only one on here with any class. Babies do get on schedules or they should. So schedule feedings when ever possible. Also, if you see women "hanging" out of clothing or swim suits or walking topless on a beach, they get stares as well. Not acceptable if you have any class at all. Breastfeeding is natural but there is a time and place. Also, there is an appropriate time for weening. Personally, breastfeeding after 6 months is ridiculous. Babies should start eating solids by then. I do take offense when I see a 6 year old breastfeeding IN PUBLIC. My son is 8 months now and I cannot imagine breastfeeding him at this point. He has already become his own little person and wants nothing to do with feeding off of me. He loves sitting down with the family as a normal human being and eating with the rest of us in his own chair.






 You think Jessica is the only one with any class??? Just because your opinion is different than the majority here does not make us classless women. In fact you made yourself look very unclassy & I certainly take offense. I'm not even sure Jessica would be flattered by your statement as she presented her opinion on the subject in a respectful way. To each their own, but no need for a small minded comment like that.






"I'm not even sure Jessica would be flattered by your statement as she presented her opinion on the subject in a respectful way."-scratch that statement from my last comment..lol..I see she wasn't that respectful in putting her opinion out there.

Jenna - posted on 01/28/2009

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AMEN!! After everything that's ever been aired on TV you would think people would get over it already. It's a natural part of life.

Tiffany - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Christi:

Well, I think Jessica is the only one on here with any class. Babies do get on schedules or they should. So schedule feedings when ever possible. Also, if you see women "hanging" out of clothing or swim suits or walking topless on a beach, they get stares as well. Not acceptable if you have any class at all. Breastfeeding is natural but there is a time and place. Also, there is an appropriate time for weening. Personally, breastfeeding after 6 months is ridiculous. Babies should start eating solids by then. I do take offense when I see a 6 year old breastfeeding IN PUBLIC. My son is 8 months now and I cannot imagine breastfeeding him at this point. He has already become his own little person and wants nothing to do with feeding off of me. He loves sitting down with the family as a normal human being and eating with the rest of us in his own chair.



 You think Jessica is the only one with any class??? Just because your opinion is different than the majority here does not make us classless women. In fact you made yourself look very unclassy & I certainly take offense. I'm not even sure Jessica would be flattered by your statement as she presented her opinion on the subject in a respectful way. To each their own, but no need for a small minded comment like that.

Amy Beth - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Christi:

Well, I think Jessica is the only one on here with any class. Babies do get on schedules or they should. So schedule feedings when ever possible. Also, if you see women "hanging" out of clothing or swim suits or walking topless on a beach, they get stares as well. Not acceptable if you have any class at all. Breastfeeding is natural but there is a time and place. Also, there is an appropriate time for weening. Personally, breastfeeding after 6 months is ridiculous. Babies should start eating solids by then. I do take offense when I see a 6 year old breastfeeding IN PUBLIC. My son is 8 months now and I cannot imagine breastfeeding him at this point. He has already become his own little person and wants nothing to do with feeding off of me. He loves sitting down with the family as a normal human being and eating with the rest of us in his own chair.


 



I must disagree.  I breastfed for over 6 years straight with my two children.  I was always polite, but my kids did not care for blankets on their faces.  They wanted to see my face, which is a key bonding thing.  My children received nutrition (solid foods and nursing go well together) and comfort when hurt, sick, or just wanting to cuddle.  My kids eat dinner with the family just like your son.  We just had another opportunity for connection.  The benefits were healthier, happier kids and a lower risk of breast cancer for me.  People are uncomfortable with the uncommon.  The more women breastfeed in public, the more people will get used to it.  Showing your ankles used to show no class.  As long as you are kind and caring, breastfeeding is completely classy.

Madelyn - posted on 01/28/2009

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I agree that this is crazy and people need to focus on something else.  I felt uncomfortable BF in public with my first child, but now with my 2nd I do it all the time. I cover up ofcourse not to offend others and because I don't want to expose myself. This is how I feed my child and I'm proud of it too bad if others find it offensive!

Michelle - posted on 01/28/2009

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Choosing whether to breast feed or bottle feed is like choosing your religion or political party. It's your choice and you shouldn't have to defend it. I breast feed. I looked at all the options and chose that path. Are people really arguing over breast feeding a baby in public? Or breast feeding discreetly in public. I have only seen 1 person breast feeding in public since I've had my son 7 months ago. I'm sure there have been plenty more but they have been discreet about it. When I nurse, it just looks like he's asleep in my arms. If you can tell I'm nursing, you're looking too hard! If I'm not wearing appropriate clothing, I'll seek out a fitting room or other quiet place to nurse. It's no one's place to criticize someone else's choices. I was a formula fed baby and I consider myself extremely driven, intelligent and well spoken. But I feel that my children will benefit more from breast milk.

User - posted on 01/28/2009

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I was at a family event on the weekend and was breast feeding. My 5 year old neice came over and asked to see the baby. I said she is eating but she could see her when she is done. My neice then asked where the milk was coming from and I explained to her where it was coming from. She said, "Oh, that's neat" and then went off to play.



Kids don't make it a big deal unless their parents do.



And honestly how many breastfeeding women do you run into on a day to day basis, and how many of those are just letting it all hang out???



In my entire life I have never seen the nipple of someone who was breastfeeding. And rarely do I see anyone doing it at all....why? probably because they are discreet about it like 99% of people are.



Those of you that have problems with public nursing...is this in general or do you just not like it when there is boob showing. Does it still bother you if mom and baby are covered?



Does it not seem funny to some of you that the western world is really the only place that there are people who are bothered by breastfeeding??



90% of the rest of the world sees it for what it is, feeding a hungry child.



Also in these economic times...formula is expensive, breastmilk is free.



ANd for those who suggest a "rigid schedule"....my doctor and midwife specifically said DO NOT try to put your baby on a schedule before 6 months of age, they need to feed on demand.

Tiffany - posted on 01/28/2009

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I just had to come back for a moment. After seeing the many comments from women that don't want to have to explain to their children what is going on with a breastfeeding mom in public or just don't want their children to see it...I have an honest question to these ladies.



Ladies, I respect your opinions here although they are different from mine. We can agree to disagree. But honestly I would like to know that if breastfeeding is a bother to you when your children see it what do you do about the barely clothed women in public they witness? Or how about the gay or lesbian couple you encounter that are loving on each other in a way your children have never seen a man/man or woman/woman do with each other before? I really am just curious here about this because so many of you have cited your children being a reason you are opposed to breastfeeding in public & such. Please enlighten me. Because to me breastfeeding is way easier to explain than the rest.

Tiffany - posted on 01/28/2009

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High Five to you for posting this topic starter. I don't why society looks down on a woman for using her breasts for what they were made for but we are just fine looking at the woman in the itty bitty bikini that basically just covers the nipples or the thong hanging out of her low rise jeans. Our breasts are on our bodies for exactly this purpose, of course they are alternatively enjoyable for the men in our lives..lol..for different reasons. Of all the freedoms people are fighting for in this day & age why does a child recieving nourishment bother them? In my circle of girlfriends we are 50/50 with breastfeeding and bottle feeding. Our children have been exposed to both. I have never & will never take offense to a breastfeeding mother in public...I don't care if she's covered or letting it all hang out. I wish more people could look at it that way. We have an almost 4 year old daughter & our son will be here in the next few weeks so we have been doing alot of talking about it with her because mommy will be breastfeeding. We have looked at pictures and explained it all. When she sees a nursing mother all she says is look mommy she's feeding her baby. What really gets me are the people that suggest breastfeeding in the bathroom & such. Do they eat lunch sitting on the toilet?

User - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Jessica:

but just because you seem to feel you have no other choice (there is always formula) doesn't mean that you have the right to whip out your breast wherever you are without consideration to the other people around you.



EXCUSE ME??? Why should  I feed my child formula (which is not as healthy, just because you might feel uncomfortable. That is your problem. You need to unclench...yes it is natural and women aren't just whipping out their breasts. You make it sound like something sexual or awful. You really need to grow up. We are feeding our babies and most people do it discreetly.



And you said it doesn't mean we have the right to whip out our breasts and nurse our babies...well actually that is exactly what it means. I don't know what the laws are where you are but here in Canada we have the legal right to feed our babies whenever and wherever we want BECAUSE ITS WHAT IS BEST FOR OUR BABIES.



 

Kris - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Lauren:

I don't usually respond to topics but this one I just had to. I am a mother to a 5 year old and a 16 month old. Personally I did not have the ability to breastfeed my children and was condemned by the nature's way people. I had a cyst removed with the first one when she was 6 weeks old because when my milk came in and I fed it turned into the size of a grapefruit. When they went in to get the cyst out, the accidently tore through several of my milk ducts. When the second came around my ducts litterally would not let the milk out period. My body completly rejected the idea, so I bottle fed formula to both of my girls.

I think it is offensive for mothers who don't cover up to feed in public. Personally I don't like having un needed conversations with my 5 year old who is so curious about the world around her. Ontop of that, I don't want to see any other woman's nipple when I am trying to run my own errands. Yes it is natural for a woman to feed her nursing BABY whenever the baby needs to be fed. However, I have seen many mothers not be very tactful about this chore.

Plus it is utter crap that kids can't be on a schedule. Both of my daughters were on a very tight and rigid schedule by 2-3 months old. I now have two kids who know when it is time to eat and time to go to bed etc. I stay home with them and could let them make their own schedule but that isn't how the world works, we don't get to make our own schedule as mothers or in the workforce. I think it teaches a child structure and balance even before they know what the words mean.

Plus to those who will condemn me for bottle feeding formula to my kids, they are both just as smart and healthy as any other child. My 5 year old is in Pre-K and is already the smartest in her class. I fid it offensive that you would even try to come to the conclusion about your child having a higher IQ than mine based on breast vs. formula, that is completely idiocracy at its best. My 17 month old is getting over her second ear infection and second sickness ever in her life! As to the comment about not sleeping while on formula, my 5 year old slept through the night at 6 weeks and my 17 month old at 2 1/2 months. They now both sleep at least 10 hours a night because as my 5 year old puts it she needs her beauty sleep. Ontop of that there is no stomach irritation from formula at all. Then there is the whole sterilization thing, with the technology we have now I simply put the bottles in the container and push a button and it steams them.


What are you going to say to her when she asks about the teenage couple making out in the mall or comes to you with questions about sex and where babies come from?  Personally, I think answering a question regarding a mother feeding her child is going to be much easier!!  I am a licensed child care provider who nurses my 9 week old during daycare hours (yes, I use a blanket to cover myself).  When asked what I am doing, I simply say I am feeding my baby.   There is no embarrassment and no other questions.  Children ARE curious about the world around us-the good and the bad.  Be careful what things you put into those categories!! 

Kris - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Lauren:

I don't usually respond to topics but this one I just had to. I am a mother to a 5 year old and a 16 month old. Personally I did not have the ability to breastfeed my children and was condemned by the nature's way people. I had a cyst removed with the first one when she was 6 weeks old because when my milk came in and I fed it turned into the size of a grapefruit. When they went in to get the cyst out, the accidently tore through several of my milk ducts. When the second came around my ducts litterally would not let the milk out period. My body completly rejected the idea, so I bottle fed formula to both of my girls.

I think it is offensive for mothers who don't cover up to feed in public. Personally I don't like having un needed conversations with my 5 year old who is so curious about the world around her. Ontop of that, I don't want to see any other woman's nipple when I am trying to run my own errands. Yes it is natural for a woman to feed her nursing BABY whenever the baby needs to be fed. However, I have seen many mothers not be very tactful about this chore.

Plus it is utter crap that kids can't be on a schedule. Both of my daughters were on a very tight and rigid schedule by 2-3 months old. I now have two kids who know when it is time to eat and time to go to bed etc. I stay home with them and could let them make their own schedule but that isn't how the world works, we don't get to make our own schedule as mothers or in the workforce. I think it teaches a child structure and balance even before they know what the words mean.

Plus to those who will condemn me for bottle feeding formula to my kids, they are both just as smart and healthy as any other child. My 5 year old is in Pre-K and is already the smartest in her class. I fid it offensive that you would even try to come to the conclusion about your child having a higher IQ than mine based on breast vs. formula, that is completely idiocracy at its best. My 17 month old is getting over her second ear infection and second sickness ever in her life! As to the comment about not sleeping while on formula, my 5 year old slept through the night at 6 weeks and my 17 month old at 2 1/2 months. They now both sleep at least 10 hours a night because as my 5 year old puts it she needs her beauty sleep. Ontop of that there is no stomach irritation from formula at all. Then there is the whole sterilization thing, with the technology we have now I simply put the bottles in the container and push a button and it steams them.


What are you going to say to her when she asks about the teenage couple making out in the mall or comes to you with questions about sex and where babies come from?  Personally, I think answering a question regarding a mother feeding her child is going to be much easier!!  I am a licensed child care provider who nurses my 9 week old during daycare hours (yes, I use a blanket to cover myself).  When asked what I am doing, I simply say I am feeding my baby.   There is no embarrassment and no other questions.  Children ARE curious about the world around us-the good and the bad.  Be careful what things you put into those categories!! 

Brenda - posted on 01/28/2009

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I've been involved with some groups on facebook against this rediculous situation for a while now.  I have seen through these groups some of the pictures that Facebook has deemed inappropriate.  Many of them do not show nipple or even a patch of darker skin, and a good deal of them barely show anything except a strip of skin under a shirt or close to the baby's mouth.  Public nursing is a right and women should not be shoved into dirty, unsanitary bathrooms and hidden for doing what is natural to them.  I mean, come on, its a boob.  Everyone has them, or has seen them.  I planned to nurse with my oldest but had to stop due to surgery at a month, and I plan to nurse with this one.  While I do plan to use a cover, I shouldn't be shamed into doing so just because other people are immature and cannot handle the fact that a breast is not something used only for sex.  I cannot even imagine anyone in this day and age being offended by it, but there are of course plenty of them out there.  It is just another form of sexual harassment against women, trying to tie us to our homes because we choose to use our breasts for nature's inention and do what we feel is best for our children.

Laurel - posted on 01/28/2009

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Nursing is nourishing the child and should not be about showing off your breast size. Be mature about it and responsible to the task at hand. Be discrete and use appropiate behavior. Breastfeeding is a true form of natural, organic food and bonding between Mother and child. It is sacrificial and rewarding all at the same time.

Anna - posted on 01/28/2009

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Amen to all you nursing mommies who aren't afraid to "whip it out" in public!!!!!! How about most "socially inappropriate" place you have ever had to soothe your little one as only you can!!!?? Me...a not so nice car mechanic shop whilst waiting to get my oil changed!! My daughter got fussy and so I fed her, and yes i use a cover so as to maintain privacy. Some guy sat right next to me and when she was done and peeked her head out of the blanket he said, "wow, she looks happy!" and yes she did! and too all those that think you should give bottles in public...boo, and amen to the comments about flaunting your breasts in public and at the swimming pool. next time when i breastfeed i will just where a string bikini when i do it and maybe people wont mind as much!!!!! :)

Naima - posted on 01/28/2009

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Well I breastfeed my son and to me it's the other way around.  I feel uncomfortable.  I am very discreet, I use a blanket, but my son makes alooooot of noise lol.  It's crazy how people are, they don't even notice I am breastfeeding.  They walk up and ask to see the baby, then I tell them I am feeding them and it's at that moment they try to "act" offended.  I say act because prior to them knowing I was feeding him it doesn't bother them.  Apparently it's the thought that I am feeding him that people don't like.  Quite frankly, I could care less.  I breastfeed him when I go out to eat and I am not ashamed to do it anywhere.  If you were hungry you would pull out a snack so why does my baby have to suffer.  



Also in response to an earlier post that you should pump ... the benefits of breastfeeding, in my opinion, are convenience, bonding, and health.  Why would I give up two of three things just to please a total stranger??  Pumping takes away the convenience factor completely and as far as bonding goes is equal to just giving your baby a bottle of formula.  My child thoroughly enjoys being breastfed and he honestly limits me to the number of bottles he will take lol So I am not going to force my child to be on a bottle just because someone else can't grow up, breastfeeding is the way God intended for us to nuture our children, if you want to do it another way fine, but don't knock me for sticking with the boob and yes I will continue to do it anywhere I please!

Sarah - posted on 01/28/2009

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I never felt comfortable feeding in public because i knew people would look at me and think it was wrong but i don't think it should be a problem if someone wanted to do it, it is a natural thing to do, and the baby needs to eat. Doesn't bother me, I just think if someone is going to do it they should cover up, but there is alot of perverts out there that's another reason why i wouldn't do it.

[deleted account]

Quoting Jessica:

As a breastfeeding mother I don't like to see other people breastfeeding their child in public. I don't get offended, but I still don't like to see it. I take time to pump, try to plan my outings around his meals and make sure I have enough bottles when we leave the house. Sure, in an emergency I will breastfeed when we are out of the house but I have usually gone out to the car or into another room. I don't see the need to sit in the middle of a restaurant while you are breastfeeding.


When I had my first baby, my husband was uncomfortable with public nursing.  He wanted me to feed him in the bathroom.  I told him I would if he took his food into the bathroom to eat.  Thankfully, he's a lot more accepting of it now.  Babies have the same rights as the rest of us.  We are not told we can only eat at home or in the car, why should our babies have to.  For those people who have a problem with my daughter nursing in public.....You go eat in the bathroom, and let my baby enjoy her meal!

Amy - posted on 01/28/2009

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God gave women breasts to feed their babies. Humans turned breasts into a sexual thing. Breasts ARE for feeding babies - that's why we have them - that's why we were created with them. There shouldn't be any shame in feeding a baby with your breasts because that's what they are for!

However, in today's society unfortunately, they are considered "private parts". Otherwise there wouldn't be this forum, and there wouldn't be so much controversy over it.

Since they are now "private parts"... (whether they should be or not), people are offended when they are exposed. I think the best thing we can do as breastfeeding moms is to gradually help people get past this boob phobia by feeding in public if need be, but just try to limit the amount of boob exposure by covering with a blanket/cloth since there are obviously those out there who are offended.

It's a shame, but I do feel weird breastfeeding in public because I don't like to offend people. I've only had to do it twice in 5 months (in a restaurant booth, covered with a blanket). I wish that society didn't look down on it - it'd be nice if it were looked at as a normal occurrence and not such a big deal was made of it!

Becky - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Andrea:

I love breastfeeding, even if I only do it at nighttime now, because my little girl is a year old and doesn´t really need it during the day anymore. but if we are out somewhere, and there is no food, she still gets breastmilk. But I know what you mean with people being funny about it especially the older generation. My husbands grandmother banned from breastfeeding my daughter on her 80th birthdayparty! I had to sit by myself in an empty restaurant so people don´t get offended. I only found out on the day, otherwise I wouldn´t have gone. Same women asked me after 3 month if I started giving her some bananas to eat, so the poor kid gets some vitamins. And at x-mas, the disgusted question, Are you STILL breastfeeding??? She probably thinks, I am going for the easy unhealthy option, instead of giving her the good powder stuff.AArrgh, she drives me crazy ;-)


I am sooooooooooo sorry, Andrea, that your husbands grandmother acts that way!  My daughter just turned one on New Years, and I stopped a week before her birthday (which is just what I decided), but my mom was so disappointed that I had decided to stop!  She believes you should nurse until the child decides it's time!

Christa - posted on 01/28/2009

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yeah ppl tend to tell you not to offer a bottle too early because of confusion but they don't say if you wait too long they will nto take at all!!!



He is 6 months now and eating solids and starting to drink out of a sippy cup here and there so one good thing is I skipped the whole bottle process period hehe

Becky - posted on 01/28/2009

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Nicely said, Christa W. After a certain number of weeks, my daughter would not take a bottle either.

Becky - posted on 01/28/2009

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Well, I did breastfeed until a week before my daughters birthday. I fed her in public, but I was discreet as possible. I understand that many women don't have the choice of breast or bottle. Most of my friends were unable to breastfeed, some just chose the bottle. I just want to know for those of you who are offended by public breastfeeding: Would you be offended if someone asked you to please cover your child or take them into a bathroom to feed him/her with a bottle? Or better yet, do YOU eat in the bathroom?

Christa - posted on 01/28/2009

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Thats all fine and dandy but what if your baby will nto take a bottle??? then are you supposed to just not feed them?? My son will not take a bottle and if he needs to eat so be it, I usually find a place that is designated for that purpose but if no place is available I feed him covered. I have no problems with ppl feeding in public, ppl sit and bottle feed baby when needed so I feel if a baby needs to be fed then feed it.

Lauren - posted on 01/28/2009

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As a mother I did take it personally against my children. Plus now that we have the techology that we do there are even more studies that show diffferent than what we were first taught. Just because there is one study showing one thing there just might be another study later showing something completely different. We live in a world where medical issues and studies come out daily.



As other mothers who do breastfeed have pointed out there is a tactful way of doing it in public without disrespecting others around you. It has everything to do with respecting your body and not flashing those who don't care to see what you have or don't have. Just be respectful and there shouldn't be an issue.

Marin - posted on 01/28/2009

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Why should we care if " some men " might be tempted? That is completely not our problem. That is that man's problem. Anyone who sees a woman breastfeeding her baby and thinks it's something sexuall is sick and needs to address those issues with a professional.

Michelle - posted on 01/28/2009

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I have to admit that when I first started breastfeeding I was self-conscience in public. But now I REALLY don't care! If you aren't going to provide me with a spot to nurse discreetly, then I'm gonna nurse where I can! I don't use a blanket because my son (7 months) just pulls it off and when he was younger he would cry if I used one. I do make sure that my whole boob isn't hangin' out or anything... You usually can't see anything when I nurse in public. It is a shame that we have to deal with the dirty looks and the old ladies walking by shaking their heads like it's pornographic or something.

User - posted on 01/28/2009

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Um...it takes almost nothing to tempt other men. Some men you could walk by them and they are tempted. Who is married and has been hit on? I know I have. I know I wouldn't do that to my spouse. I don't care how another man sees me, it's not happening. And when feeding a baby, you wouldn't attract a man like you would dancing topless at a bar. It's different.



A little boy peeing in public would embarass a mother because it's mean to go in the toilet. Breast milk is meant to go in a baby's mouth. If something is used as intended it's not offensive.



And I don't think that the IQ issue is random things read on random websites. I heard that long before I had a computer.  It's statistics from studies performed by professionals I am sure. And it doesn't mean that bottle fed babies are not smart. It's not a personal attack.

Lauren - posted on 01/28/2009

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I have to respond to those who responded to my post.



With my five year old I would be humiliated if she were out in public and lifted her shirt to hurse her baby doll. Wouldn't a mother of a boy be humiliated if he whips his junk out in public and starts peeing? And apparently where I live there aren't people like who you guys see out in public. I don't see nudity and people flashing their stuff out there. My daughter knows what is lady like and what is not and she knows what to cover up including her boobies. It has more to do with respecting yourself and not flashing about something that could tempt another man because yes some men are very sexually attracted to breasts no matter what they are being used for.



When it comes to the whole IQ issue, saying that one's child has a higher IQ and is healthier and more fit than another simply because they were breastfed over another who was bottle fed is uttter BS! Not everything you read on the internet is correct and valid! If you start quoting things that you read online as the "facts" then you are putting yourself up to look pretty dumb.

Marin - posted on 01/28/2009

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To reply to the above statements from Katrina Brett and Jen Peacock, I am exclusively breastfeeding my 3 & 1/2 month old son and I am a young Teen Mother. For me the only way I would have used formula was if I could not breastfeed. I am proud of myself for breastfeeding and making the choice to do what I feel is best for my son. Most of my friends who also would be considered teen mothers are breastfeeding unless they are physically unable. So to Katrina, I would be confident in saying that more and more young people will be breastfeeding. As to one of the points that Jen brought up, the one about having a schedule. I personally feel the same way! Breastfeeding is a strickly on demand feeding tool, as breastfeeding mothers cannot see or measure how much milk their child is getting. They may eat once and be full but then 20 minutes later they are hungry again! And as was said in an above post when my child is hungry I will feed him whenever and wherever I am. I won't put my child through a screaming fit while I try and find somewhere to "hide". Why put him through that ordeal when the only one I would be appeasing is the people who aren't mature enough to deal with a nursing mother? I do make the choice to be discreet, I wear nursing bras and nursing tops so as to show as little breast as possible and use a blanket until I have myself covered by his head. But if someone doesn't take as much caution as I do I will not condemn them for it. They are just trying to provide for their child. I say well done and good job to those like me who choose to breastfeed and not be intimidated or driven away by the childish views from those who can't handle it.

Marin - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Rebekah:

WOW!! And here I go again!! I will rant until my fingers hurt form typing! Scheduling, like breast vs bottle, is not for every mother and as I have been told to "shut up" and "back off" by many other mothers, I'm sure I will get a lashing here too, by some of you as well...
Not all of us are super organised and have the support need to pump, breastfeed AND go on with our household/life duties as mothers, so for goodness sake... lay off with the "this is how I do it, so why can't you do it too?" comments and let us have our opinion about the fact that we should not have to cover it up for your or anybody else. I said it before and will say it AGAIN.... our babies are hungry and they need to be fed. I agree with the fact that that is OUR choice and WE AND OUR CHILDREN have every right to do it OUR WAY!!! I cannot believe it either!?! That in this, the year 2009, that there are still people out there fighting to force us to cover up or hide for THEIR peace of mind! There are still illegal drugs out there, wars going on, children being abused and killed in horrific situations all over the world and some people are still trying to push their selfish, ignorant standards on to those of us who have children to raise and keep safe in this ever changing world???!!!??? It's our turn to say "BACK OFF!!!"



Well said Rebekah i completely agree!!

Christi - posted on 01/28/2009

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OMG! Don't all of you have more important things to attend to than to just keep dragging this in the mud? Just agree to disagree and move on. Don't all of you have children to attend to? I know I do. I am done with this.

Sarah - posted on 01/28/2009

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Can I also say in response to those mothers who believe strict routine and feeding schedule should be implemented.......research shows - and by research I mean facts and figures collected by doctors and other health professionals - that generally babies that are breast fed on demand by 12 months will be leaner and healthier than bottle fed babies. This is believed to be as a direct result of babies being allowed to feed when they need to and not having a set diet of 'x' an amount of ounces of milk each day forced down their necks! Ultimately this leads to healthier children as they have learnt from a young age when they have 'had enough'.

Just a thought x

User - posted on 01/28/2009

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I am brand new here to circle of moms. This is the very first thread I've read and it's been an interesting read. I have a 3 year old daughter and a 5 year old daughter. I breastfed both of them. I used a pump at work to send milk to day care but when I was with them and they were hungry I fed them with out a second thought.



With my second daughter my employer gave me a lot of grief about using the pump. Not so much the time spent away from my desk but she saw what I was doing as gross and made me do it in the bathroom. I researched everything I could to find out what my rights were. They can't do that. The state in which I live it is against the law to expose your breast unless it is for nursing a child. So I understand how it feels to be trying to just take care of your baby and have people make you feel bad about it.



I did nurse where ever I was but I kept myself covered. And it's not so much that I am worried about how a stranger feels about seeing my body parts it's that i am self conscious and I like privacy. My husband was always willing to help me drape a blanket or what ever. The only stares I ever got in public were because of other nosy individuals. We went to the zoo and I placed blankets in the window and rolled the windows up for privacy, a teen age boy came running and I heard him shout "I saw her boob dad"



But it's worth laughing off. How other people view breast feeding is not worth stressing over, do what you've got to do to take care of your kids the best you can! If someone had to go to their car or what ever with a bottle with a screaming/hungry it would be neglectful! Just feed your baby.



I would also like to add that I can respect other people's views on it. My step mother didn't breastfeed simply because it's cold where she lives, her kids were born in the winter and she was afraid of how a leaking breast would feel in negative temperatures. I've known people who think it's just rude. When it comes down to it, it's your body, your baby, do your thing : )

Rebekah - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Katrina:



soon all of us mums are going to be told to stop breastfeeding and start bottle feeding thats what i think but i ent going to stand for that im 20 years old im not very old but im more than happy to breastfeed and i would actually like to see more young people doing it





GOOD ON YOU GURL!!! I have that fear myself sometimes and I applaud you and ANY mum who chooses to make that decision and has success. (Not to say that other mums that make other choices for whatever reason do not deserve a big round of applause too) It's just that I have many friends who have ahd babies around my age and I am the only one who stuck to my guns, for as long as I did and did what I thought was best for mMY girls. (and would have done for my son also, had I been GIVEN a choice!!!)



SO many women bottlefeed these days and breastfeeding, has for quite a few many years now, been the minority group in the debate.



It is only MY personal opinion here ladies, but I do feel sad for those mums and babies that either don't get a choice, one way or the other and that have terrible experiences with breastfeeding or that don't want to try to experience it with their kids. Fair enough if it's been bad before or your milk just doesn't show up or you dry up too quickly, or whatever.... but c'mon, why not TRY it, even once, just to SEE if it's right for you, given the opportunity???



 

Anne - posted on 01/28/2009

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Quoting Jen:

ok, a few hot topics were brought up in this thread....

1. nursing in public ... I personally choose not to, but it doesnt bother me if other women choose to do so.
2. scheduled feedings.. my baby is only 2 months old and I personally believe that babies need to be fed on demand and that trying to schedule their feedings is not putting their needs first....
3. bottle vs breast... I breastfeed at home but CHOOSE to give my son formula in a bottle when we go out, he goes back and forth easily and this is what works best for us..

PS. I've gotten good at typing one handed with baby nursing in the other arm :)



Amen sister!

User - posted on 01/28/2009

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ok, a few hot topics were brought up in this thread....



1. nursing in public ... I personally choose not to, but it doesnt bother me if other women choose to do so.

2. scheduled feedings.. my baby is only 2 months old and I personally believe that babies need to be fed on demand and that trying to schedule their feedings is not putting their needs first....

3. bottle vs breast... I breastfeed at home but CHOOSE to give my son formula in a bottle when we go out, he goes back and forth easily and this is what works best for us..



PS. I've gotten good at typing one handed with baby nursing in the other arm :)

Katrina - posted on 01/28/2009

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soon all of us mums are going to be told to stop breastfeeding and start bottle feeding thats what i think but i ent going to stand for that im 20 years old im not very old but im more than happy to breastfeed and i would actually like to see more young people doing it

Katrina - posted on 01/28/2009

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soon all of us mums are going to be told to stop breastfeeding and start bottle feeding thats what i think but i ent going to stand for that im 20 years old im not very old but im more than happy to breastfeed and i would actually like to see more young people doing it

[deleted account]

Quoting Anne:



Some one on here was saying they didnt want to have to explain to thier 5 year old what some one was doing if they saw a mother nursing.






Well I have a 4 year old and since Im nursing my baby she sees what Im doing and even 'nurses' her dolls :-) So she doesnt ask me about it if she sees another baby in public being nursed she just tells me that the baby is being fed. My worry is that the day is approaching when my daughter is going to see these teens and adults that think they have to make out in public. I find it very offensive to go to the park, or to the beach, or just walking down town I see people getting very passinate with each other. So, Im going to have to answer a question some day soon about what they are doing. Personally I think they are exposing poeple to more then the public needs to see just by thier actions. Also what about the men that feel the urge to urinate in a public place. Arent they revealing more then the public needs to see? ARe we allowed to protest about that display in public? arent they putting out a more privet part of them then we are with nursing? I guess the argument could be that they just had to go, but then so could it go that the baby just had to eat!






I think the world is made up of lots of people with that comes lots of different thoughts. So I guess if Im suppose to 'look away' from :






mulitiple body piercings, tattos, low cut or revealing clothing, a guy peeing in public, young lovers who cant wait till they get home,






People talk about freedom of speach, freedom to do what they want where they want.......then they too can 'look away' from what we have choosen to do in public. Feeding our children is by far more important then any of the above stated things.





My son is 3 and I openly nurse in front of him.  He knows that "boobies" are for babies to eat from and that is where his sister gets her milk from.  He aslo takes his stuffed animals and his sisters dolls and "nurses" them.   I think it is super cute that my boy will lift his shirt and pretend to feed a baby, then burb it and put it to bed for a nap:)  No different really than him pretending to feed it with a bottle:)

Rebekah - posted on 01/28/2009

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WOW!! And here I go again!! I will rant until my fingers hurt form typing! Scheduling, like breast vs bottle, is not for every mother and as I have been told to "shut up" and "back off" by many other mothers, I'm sure I will get a lashing here too, by some of you as well...
Not all of us are super organised and have the support need to pump, breastfeed AND go on with our household/life duties as mothers, so for goodness sake... lay off with the "this is how I do it, so why can't you do it too?" comments and let us have our opinion about the fact that we should not have to cover it up for your or anybody else. I said it before and will say it AGAIN.... our babies are hungry and they need to be fed. I agree with the fact that that is OUR choice and WE AND OUR CHILDREN have every right to do it OUR WAY!!! I cannot believe it either!?! That in this, the year 2009, that there are still people out there fighting to force us to cover up or hide for THEIR peace of mind! There are still illegal drugs out there, wars going on, children being abused and killed in horrific situations all over the world and some people are still trying to push their selfish, ignorant standards on to those of us who have children to raise and keep safe in this ever changing world???!!!??? It's our turn to say "BACK OFF!!!"

Katrina - posted on 01/28/2009

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my grandad and nan dont care they wanted me to breastfeed my daughter i used to go out into a diff room to breastfeed her and they was like why you doing that for your missing out cause your going into a diff room i dont see why we have to feel bad for wanting to breastfeed our kids i am happy tho my little sis is preg and she is going to breastfeed her baby cause i did it im proud of her

Katrina - posted on 01/28/2009

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my grandad and nan dont care they wanted me to breastfeed my daughter i used to go out into a diff room to breastfeed her and they was like why you doing that for your missing out cause your going into a diff room i dont see why we have to feel bad for wanting to breastfeed our kids i am happy tho my little sis is preg and she is going to breastfeed her baby cause i did it im proud of her

Andrea - posted on 01/28/2009

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I love breastfeeding, even if I only do it at nighttime now, because my little girl is a year old and doesn´t really need it during the day anymore. but if we are out somewhere, and there is no food, she still gets breastmilk. But I know what you mean with people being funny about it especially the older generation. My husbands grandmother banned from breastfeeding my daughter on her 80th birthdayparty! I had to sit by myself in an empty restaurant so people don´t get offended. I only found out on the day, otherwise I wouldn´t have gone. Same women asked me after 3 month if I started giving her some bananas to eat, so the poor kid gets some vitamins. And at x-mas, the disgusted question, Are you STILL breastfeeding??? She probably thinks, I am going for the easy unhealthy option, instead of giving her the good powder stuff.AArrgh, she drives me crazy ;-)

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